


Welcome the Angels of Sioux Falls (And Then Some)

by pastelbluebirds



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst and Humor, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Family Drama, Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Humor, Fluffy Ending, Humor, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Siblings, Protective lovers, Protectiveness, Shameless Smut, Sibling Incest, With A Twist
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-22
Updated: 2018-07-09
Packaged: 2019-04-26 16:46:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 13
Words: 56,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14406297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pastelbluebirds/pseuds/pastelbluebirds
Summary: The Lucifer and Gabriel are casted out from Heaven. Not because they didn't bow down to humanity, but instead for bad behavior. God needs to know if they can act like the proper protectors, saying they can only come back to Heaven when they collect enough Heaven Coins. However he kinda regrets his decision upon seeing the mess his sons have made.





	1. The Troublesome Duo

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you that have never watched Panty and Stocking with Garterbelt, you might be a little confused, but luckily I've watched the show before and am here to explain. Panty and Stocking are two Angels who were kicked out of Heaven for bad behavior. In order to get back into Heaven, the two Angels must collect Heaven Coins. To help them, Panty and Stocking have companions known as Garterbelt the priest, a zipper beast named Chuck, and a nerdy rich boy in disguise named Brief. The thing about these characters is that they wield lingerie as a weapon. Panty can transform her panties into a gun and Stocking can transform her stockings into twin katana. They also represent the Seven Deadly Sins—or so it has been said/theorized.

_Sioux Falls. A city clinging to the threshold between Heaven and Hell. With a piece of its human inhabitants being regularly threatened by foul-tempered evil spirits. A faded darkness lodged in the cracks of troubled souls has struck the city, unnoticed and deadly. However there are those who wield a light beyond all human understanding and ascend their stools of righteousness to eradicate those shadows bound by the bowels of Hell. But who could it be given the duty to eliminating this darkness? Are they servants of God or minions of the Devil?_

"It's time for the morning hustle, I suppose." Michael mumbled to himself, sighing heavily. Whistling loudly, the priest waited. Suddenly and rather randomly, a crimson couch fell through the ceiling, carrying a mere mailwoman and two Angels. Archangels, to be exact. The second eldest, Lucifer. And the baby, Gabriel. "Having a good morning, Lucifer?" Michael asked in a monotone voice.

"See ya' sweetheart." Lucifer coo'd to the innocent mailwoman, waving as she scurried out the door with her clothes. The woman blushed and requested for the Archangel to call as she ran out the church. Michael then cleared his throat, finally catching the awareness of Lucifer. "Huh?" Turning to face his eldest brother, Lucifer blinked. "Oh, hey Mikey." Lucifer greeted in a bored tone, stretching his arms over his head with a loud yawn. "I didn't see you there." He murmured, burying himself further into his comforters. 'What did I expect? At least he said hello.' Michael thought with a silent huff.

"And how are you this morning, Gabriel?" Michael greeted the little Archangel, moving on.

"My morning could be better." Gabriel replied with a halfhearted shrug, snapping his fingers to make a Chupa Chups Sucker appear out of thin air. Cherry. Popping the lollipop in his mouth, Gabriel hummed in satisfaction. Michael then went to continue, about to tell his brothers the usual—another Ghost was fucking up the city—when he was cut off. "You're never gonna call, are you?" Gabriel asked Lucifer knowingly, all-the-while snuggling closer to his brother under the zaffre blankets.

"Hell no." Lucifer answered with all honesty. "It's a good thing she has a pretty face."

"That bad?" Gabriel asked, raising a curious brow.

"Dude, I almost went to sleep." Lucifer said, sighing heavily. "But enough about that." He said, waving his hand dismissively and decided to change the subject. "What's with you and this candy everyday? Don't you ever crave protein, Gabe?" Lucifer asked, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. Gabriel scoffed, knowing exactly what Lucifer really meant.

"Don't you ever _not_ , Luci?" Gabriel countered. "Besides, I'm not a savage like you. I know how to keep my hands to myself." He said jokingly.

"Prude." Lucifer teased, rolling his eyes playfully.

"It's called being a gentleman." Gabriel retorted.

"Excuse me!" Michael yelled, finally having enough of their mindless chattering. Lucifer and Gabriel then miraculously stopped their conversation without any argument, giving their older brother their full attention. "Now, as I was saying, Father has blessed us with another Heavenly Mandate." Michael said, gesturing to Castiel—a Seraph sent down from Heaven to help Michael watch over Lucifer and Gabriel.

"Oh, well, ain't that something." Lucifer said in a snarky tone, once again rolling his eyes. "You hear that, Gabe?" Lucifer inquired, shooting his younger brother an amused glance. "Apparently our dear 'Father' has 'blessed us' with another Heavenly Mandate." Lucifer mocked. There was a hint of bitterness is his voice. "'Father' isn't even in Heaven to bless this so-called 'Heavenly Mandate'." He taunted the priest. Michael growled lowly, his eyebrow twitching with irritation.

"Anyway," Michael started, ignoring Lucifer's rudeness. "Castiel, if you please." Castiel nodded obediently, holding up the piece of parchment for his brothers to read.

"Collector?" Gabriel read the scroll. "The fuck does that mean?" He asked, baffled.

"Just as it says." Castiel replied. "No doubt it has something to do with the victims."

"Which also means there is yet another Ghost on the loose within the city. And it is our duty to handle the problem." Michael added.

"What else is new?" Gabriel sighed. "Hooray, work." Gabriel cheered sarcastically, tossing his lollipop stick and swapping it out for a handful of jolly ranchers.

"I'll pretend to have not seen that." Michael muttered, the corner of his lips twitching downwards.

"Yeah, yeah." Gabriel taunted, balling up the wrappers and throwing them at his older brother.

"I **will** murder you." Michael growled, his frown quickly turning into a scowl.

"Michael." Castiel spoke. The Archangel priest turned to the Angel, seeing he had set up the projector.

"Thank you, Castiel." Michael said gratefully, and as quickly as the scowl shifted and formed into a small smile. Honestly it was entertaining to see how fast Michael could change emotions, almost like a mood ring; Taking a deep breathe to calm himself, Michael continued. Presenting Lucifer and Gabriel a simple PowerPoint with numerous pictures of people lying dead on the ground, their eyes white and mouths agape. "As you can see here-"

"Wait a second, will ya'? I'm tryna think." Lucifer interrupted. "Mikey, just so we're straight, people's souls or whatnot are getting snatched and you want us to track down the culprit?"

"You two can never shut up, can you?" Michael asked, his cheeks turning pink in frustration, once again his mood shifting. "Must you always be the center of attention?!"

"I mean, we _do_ save the world." Lucifer said, and Gabriel nodded in agreement.

"You save one _city_ and you can barely do that. Your 'success' surely and truly doesn't even count as you two saving either a capital or an entire state within the whole country." Michael argued fiercely. "If you want to return to Heaven you must collect Heaven Coins and you get Heaven Coins by killing evil Ghosts!" He ranted, holding up one of the many Heaven Coin Cases which only held three coins. "It's almost as if you two wish to stay on Earth forever! This is punishment, not a joke!" Lucifer and Gabriel yawned, finding no interest whatsoever in Michael's lecture. "Need I remind you that you are not here to collect men, women, or sugar! So stop acting like ungrateful heathens and start acting like Archangels!"

"Michael, get with the times. There's more than two genders." Gabriel stated, stuffing his face with sour patch kids.

"You're missing the point!" Michael yelled angrily, his cheeks turning red. His brothers always knew how to push his buttons.

"'Father' gave us a mission, yada yada yada, soul sucking sonsuvbitches, blah blah blah, save Sioux Falls. Pretty sure I heard man-eating toilets somewhere in your rant, but hey, who the hell cares about minor details? But yeah we get it, Mikey." Lucifer said, taunting his brother. Throwing off the covers, the Archangels stood in front of Michael, dressed and ready to kick some ass. Ignoring Michael's protest about Grace abuse or some shit like that. "Gabriel."

"Yeah Lucifer?" Gabriel replied.

"You ready to roll?" Lucifer asked, holding up the car keys to the Pimpmobile. A 1978 Lincoln Continental Mark V—to which the Angels have fondly named Transparent. Michael watched as Lucifer and Gabriel disappeared as the front doors of the church slammed shut. He sighed heavily, stepping down from the alter and taking a seat on the abandoned red couch. Michael rested his elbow on the armrest, his cheek pressed against the palm of his hand, and his eyes closed as he mind became to swarm.

"Michael?" Castiel stood in front of the exhausted priest. Michael opened his eyes, scanning over the little Angel: Castiel's head was tilted like a confused puppy and his posture was much like a servant waiting for instructions. Michael tsked quietly and patted the empty space besides him. Castiel hesitated, but then sat down next to his elder brother. "Michael, is something the matter?"

"Just thinking." Michael answered.

"If it is about Lucifer and Gabriel, I'm sure they'll be fine." Castiel said, reassuring Michael.

"I know they will be." Michael agreed. "But that isn't what I'm talking about." He added, confusing the Angel. "I was thinking about our time in Heaven."

"Please, will you tell me about it?" Castiel requested. Michael glanced down at the little Angel before finally nodding in agreement.

"This was long after humans and Earth were created. At the time, Father decided it was time to tell us something important..." Michael closed his eyes, thinking back to that fateful day when both God and Amara told him, his brothers, and his sister the whole truth.

 

_Three men and one woman knelt at the hands of God and the Darkness. The Archangels Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, and Gabriel. Standing in front of the four Archangels were God and the Darkness, Chuck and Amara._

_"Father, is something the matter?" Michael asked, concerned and ready for battle. Michael—the eldest Archangel—was known by many titles. Titles such as Saint Michael, the Commander of Heaven, a powerful warrior and general._

_"When you sent word out to see us, we thought for the worst." Lucifer explained, peeking out through his long lashes and blonde locks. Lucifer—the second eldest Archangel—was much like Michael. He was a General of Heaven and a powerful warrior. At first he envied Michael, which was understandable. His older brother was currently of a higher status than himself. But then he quickly pitied Michael, because Lucifer had much more free time. Lucifer was then able to teach Gabriel many tricks, sneak out of Heaven, and visit the abandoned Garden of Eden._

_"Please tell us it is nothing." Raphael said, almost as a form of request. Raphael—the third Archangel—was the Right-hand of Michael. This meant she didn't fight very often. But when she did, Raphael was a great force to be reckoned with. When she wasn't on the battlefield, she would heal the wounded warriors. This earned her the title The Great Healer of God._

_"I'm sure it_ is _nothing." Gabriel said to Raphael, trying to reassure the woman. "Right Pops?" Gabriel asked Chuck, his query quiet and nervous. Gabriel—the baby Archangel—was much more simpler than his siblings. He was a warrior, yes, but he delivered the sacred messages of God. This earned him the title Messenger of the Lord._

_"There's nothing wrong." Chuck reassured the four worried Archangels. "But yes, there is an important matter I wanted to discuss."_

 

"Father told us everything. That when he made all Angels, he tweaked our DNA." Michael explained. "Castiel, do you know what the Seven Deadly Sins and Seven Heavenly Virtues are?" He asked, and Castiel nodded. "Well, what if I told you we have a chunk of Sin or Virtue within us?" Castiel let all this newfound information sink in. And honestly, this didn't faze him as much as he thought it would.

"So every Angels represents either a Deadly Sin or a Heavenly Virtue?" Castiel asked, and Michael nodded. "Which would explain the Garrisons..."

"All Angels were separated between Sin and Virtue. Me, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Naomi, Ephraim, and Thaddeus led those of Sin. Meanwhile Anna, Ishim, Zachariah, Ezekiel, Hael, Rebecca, and Flagstaff led those of Virtue. The Garrisons of Sin were the Garrison of Pride, the Garrison of Lust, the Garrison of Wrath, the Garrison of Gluttony, the Garrison of Greed, the Garrison of Envy, and the Garrison of Sloth. The Garrisons of Virtue were the Garrison of Chasity, the Garrison of Liberality, the Garrison of Diligence, the Garrison of Humility, the Garrison of Patience, the Garrison of Abstinence, and the Garrison of Kindness." Michael stated, explaining as much as he could to Castiel. "Think of us as the Embodiments of either a Deadly Sin or a Heavenly Virtue." He added. "I am the Embodiment of Pride, Lucifer is the Embodiment of Lust, Raphael is the Embodiment of Wrath, and Gabriel is the Embodiment of Gluttony. All four of us are Deadly Sins. But you, as mentioned before, are a Heavenly Virtue. You, Castiel, are the Embodiment of Chasity."

"Tell me more. About you and the other Archangels." Castiel requested. "Whatever happened to your training? What even was it?"

* * *

_Raising his hand, a glowing halo appeared above Michael's head. Throwing it down, the Archangel created a dancefloor. A performance space for himself, his brothers, and his sister. Michael was dressed in a white chiton with a champagne belt that had a porcelain heart attached, a champagne bowtie choker, champagne chain-link bracelets, and champagne thigh-high gladiator sandals. Lucifer wore a white sleeveless button-front vest top, white shorts with a gold belt that had a rouge heart attached and a matching gold chain to hang from his belt buckle, a gold leather O-ring choker, gold coiled armbands, a single gold dovetail bangle on his left wrist, and gold gladiator sandals accompanied by his striped stockings. Raphael donned a lace-trim sheer taupe babydoll, a silk white bandeau and matching cheeky panties, a taupe belly chain with a mint green heart attached, a taupe gypsy anklet on her right ankle, a taupe lariat necklace, and a taupe wirework elven circlet. Gabriel was clad in a white tunic coupled with a silver belt that had a golden heart attached, a white lace choker, silver bangles, long white fingerless lace gauntlets, and silver knee-high gladiator sandals. Halos and wings flashed, giving them a more graceful appearance. Michael planted his feet on the pole and climbed to the top, carefully dipping back and using his momentum to 'round the pole in full slow circles, his back barely brushing against the cold metal and his hands running through his messy black locks as he gracefully performed a Russian Lay Back. Raphael dug her heels into the pole and climbed mid-way before swinging 'round with ease and grace, hooking her leg on the pole and detaching it before swinging 'round once again, pressing her knee against the pole and using her hand as her second support, and thus performing a Ballerina. Lucifer and Gabriel spun onto the poles, completely in sync as they dipped back and hooked their leg around the pole, performing a Gemini. Expressions of pure bliss on their face as their wings and halos flashed again. Slowly and skillfully, the Angels swiftly twirled off their poles, spinning on the balls of their feet to present themselves to their audience. Michael and Lucifer glided their hands down their sides, sliding to the floor in unison. Raphael ran her hands up her arms until they reached her shoulders, sliding her fingers under the silky garment. Gabriel combed his hands through his hair, tugging on the strands and moaning with every pull._

_**Oh pitiful shadow lost in darkness;**_

_Gabriel and Michael flashed cheeky smiles as they blew sweet kisses and flashed cocky winks. The Archangels stayed in total sync as they slipped their hands between their legs, teasing themselves._

_**Oh evil spirit born of those drifting between Heaven and Earth;**_

_Lucifer and Raphael removed their garments, flashing each other gummy smiles._

_**May the thunderous power from these holy delicate men and beautiful maiden strike down upon you with great vengeance and furious anger**_

_Michael and Gabriel bent over, taking off their boxers and briefs—respectively—all-the-while smirking confidently._

_**Shattering your loathsome impurities and returning you from once you came.**_

_Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, and Gabriel held up their garments. Grins on their faces as the lingerie started glowing dimly._

_**Repent you motherfucker!**_

 

_The four waited for something to happen, no doubt waiting for the lingerie to transform into weapons. But instead the garments' glow dimmed and nothing else happened._

_"Well that was a total bust." Michael grumbled, slipping his briefs back on under his chiton. Gabriel grunted in agreement._

_"I will never get used to this." Raphael mumbled, nervously tugging on her bra and panties. "This all seems ridiculous to me. Using clothes as weapons. It doesn't make any sense." She complained. She tried to look annoyed, but her tone was shy and her cheeks were rosy with embarrassment. Although Michael didn't blame her. Raphael was hardly wearing clothes after all._

_"I'm actually digging this whole turning-your-clothes-into-weapons thing." Gabriel spoke up, observing himself in the mirror. "I also dig our new outfits. I never knew Angels could be powerful and sexy." He said rather teasingly. "Hell, we even get our own signature colors." He said, twirling the heart on his belt. "Champagne and white." Gabriel pointed to Michael, who flashed his bracelets, heart accessory, and his massive wings. They were impressive, pure white and when they reflected in the light the glare they gave off resembled a rainbow. "Taupe and mint green." Gabriel waved his hand towards Raphael, who jiggled her belly chain and heart accessory, and even gave her wings a flutter. Her wings were beautiful, mint green with accents of jade. "Silver and whiskey." Gabriel showed off his silver bangles, his heart accessory, and his golden wings. The feathers matched his eyes perfectly. "Gold and pink." Gabriel nudged his head to Lucifer, who presented his choker, heart accessory, and pink wings. They faded into different shades of pink, the feather radiant and shimmering._

_"I like our new training room." Lucifer said, his eyes trailing over the mirror covered walls and poles that stood in the center of the room. "Dad even put in stripper poles for practice." He joked. "And we're gonna need it." He said. "Sure we got the transforming part down and we know what our 'Heavenly Garments'-"_

_"Boxers!" Gabriel cheered, excited and also a little amused._

_"Briefs." Michael said plainly, unimpressed and even a little embarrassed. Much like Gabriel, he too would have to remove his underwear in order to transform them into his weapon. Which also meant no coverage underneath the chiton._

_"Babydoll..." Raphael sighed, her blush spreading to the tips of her ears._

_"Stockings." Lucifer chirped. "But we still don't know what our 'Heavenly Weapons' look like. Meaning we have to get stronger." He pointed out. "So I say we all climb those poles and get to it."_

* * *

To say the town was under attack was a fucking understatement. The streets were crowded with damaged cars and unconscious bodies, while the sky was lit with orbs. Souls. Which means this wasn't just some ordinary Ghost. It was most likely a Soul Eater. Although there were still people that stood outside to watch as the corrupted Ghost collected the "life energy" of the innocent from its high position in the blackened sky. And for some odd reason, many people thought it was a sign...

"This is just crazy. Please tell me that I'm not the only one seeing this!"

"This is the Will of God, isn't it?"

"Is this the rapture?!"

"Please don't tell us prayer is the only thing that can get us out of this!" Michael scoffed, his eyebrow twitching in irritation. 'Idiots, the lot of them.' He thought bitterly. He understand their city was under attack, but this was a low level Ghost, meaning it can't do any real damage. It isn't going to take over the world or something, fuck, the thing probably didn't even have a brain. So the least the citizens could do was quit their useless whining and step back so the Angels could do their job.

"Why would I tell you that?" Michael asked the police chief, not even sparing him a glance. "Really, God isn't even here right now. And what do we need Him for when we have Archangels?"

"Oh." The chief said lamely, taking off his police cap to scratched at his head sheepishly. "I guess I really didn't think of it like that..." He confessed. Michael hummed with disinterest and decided it was best to move on. If the Ghost was handled with speed and care then the faster they could start repairing the city.

"Lucifer, Gabriel." Perking up at attention, Lucifer and Gabriel took a step forward. "You're up." Michael said, gesturing to the Ghost. With identical smirks, the Archangels stalked off to defeat their enemy. The cops merely scoffed and huffed at the sight.

"What? You're talking about that Satanic emo over there?"

"And that midget next to him who's _obviously_ a D-list pornstar?"

"My brothers might not seem like much, but I guarantee they're very powerful." Castiel said, putting everyone's comments to rest. Lucifer and Gabriel then stopped just mere feet from their enemy, blue and golden eyes analyzing the thing with disinterest and cockiness.

"I say it's about time to flush the toilet." Gabriel said, trying to stifle a snicker.

"Ok, that was too cheesy, even for you." Lucifer said, rolling his eyes.

"C'mon, toilet humor is the shit." Gabriel said, cackling at the unintended pun.

"How 'bout I buy you a cake from that fancy bakery you love so much and you manage to get through this without saying another fucking word?" Lucifer suggested, bribing his baby brother. Gabriel hummed in deep thought before nodding in agreement and glee.

"As long as what I'm saying now doesn't count, I'm in." Gabriel said cheekily.

"Good." Lucifer said, his smirk returning as he cracked his knuckles. "Now let's kill this motherfucker for fucking ruining our fucking peaceful ass evening and if you make this quick I'll buy you two." He said, itching for a fight. Hell, if it turned out to be one-sided.

"Repent!" The clouds opened up and a beam of bright light shined down upon the Archangels.

 

_Raising his hand, a glowing halo appeared above Lucifer's head. Throwing it down, the Archangel created a dancefloor. A performance space for himself and his brother. Lucifer wore a white sleeveless button-front vest top, white shorts with a gold belt that had a rouge heart attached and a matching gold chain to hang from his belt buckle, a gold leather O-ring choker, gold coiled armbands, a single gold dovetail bangle on his left wrist, and gold gladiator sandals accompanied by his striped stockings. Gabriel was clad in a white tunic coupled with a silver belt that had a golden heart attached, a white lace choker, silver bangles, long white fingerless lace gauntlets, and silver knee-high gladiator sandals. Halos and wings flashed, giving them a more graceful appearance. Lucifer and Gabriel spun onto the poles, completely in sync as they dipped back and hooked their leg around the pole, performing a Gemini. Expressions of pure bliss on their face as their wings and halos flashed again. Slowly and skillfully, the Angels swiftly twirled off their poles, spinning on the balls of their feet to present themselves to their audience. Lucifer glided his hands down his sides, sliding to the floor. Gabriel combed his hands through his hair, tugging on the strands and moaning with every pull.  
_

_**Oh pitiful shadow lost in darkness;**  
_

_Gabriel flashed a cheeky smile as he blew a sweet kiss and flashed a cocky wink. He then slipped his hands between his legs, teasing himself.  
_

_**Oh evil spirit born of those drifting between Heaven and Earth;**  
_

_Lucifer removed his garment, flashing a gummy smile.  
_

_**May the thunderous power from these holy delicate men strike down upon you with great vengeance and furious anger**  
_

_Gabriel bent over, taking off his boxers all-the-while smirking confidently.  
_

_**Shattering your loathsome impurities and returning you from once you came.**  
_

_Lucifer and Gabriel held up their garments. Grins on their faces as the lingerie started glowing dimly.  
_

_**Repent you motherfucker!** _

With a cocky laugh, Gabriel twirled his boxers while the lingerie burned brighter until the bright light burst to form a gun. A stainless steel Taurus, model 92 9mm with smooth swirls and wings craved into the beloved weapon known as Crotchless. Swinging down the scythe, gripping the handle as he brushed off the electric blue flames off his blade. However, he didn't stop there. Taking off his other stocking, Lucifer swiftly transformed it into a scythe similar to the first. Much like Gabriel's pistol, the edges of the scythe blades were melded with smooth swirls and wings. And the lovely twin weapons were dubbed Hellfire and Hellion. Flashing each other knowing smirks, the brothers unleashed their wings. Six for each, massive and glorious. Gabriel adored solid gold wings to match his whisky eyes, his wings matching his smile to the T. Lucifer donned lush rouge wings that fades to rose to flamingo to crisp white, the beautiful innocent colors contrasting with his personality. "On three?" Gabriel inquired. Lucifer scoffed and flashed him the same knowing smirk, raising his blades. "Alright." Gabriel chuckled happily, cocking his gun. "Three!" Michael watched closely as his brothers fought the Ghost effortlessly, amazed by their power and even by their playfully. Gabriel fired his gun at random, taunting but calculated. Lucifer served strikes, claws of light as it seemed, at the Ghost. Each strike were similar to Gabriel's. And soon the brothers reined victorious. They then flew down from the sky with smug grins on their faces as the souls quickly returned to their bodies. "Five Heavens." Gabriel said, presenting the Heaven Coins with pride. "Easy snag."

"This calls for a celebration." Lucifer declared. "And by celebration, we mean movies and curry."

"Oh, and cotton candy!" Gabriel cheered happily and eagerly, practically dancing as he hovered in the air like a descending feather.

"Maybe some strippers too." Lucifer suggested, nodding to himself.

"Lucifer, if you kept spoiling me with treats, I'll get a cavity." Gabriel said with a loud laugh, looping his arm around Lucifer's waist.

"I'm not just spoiling you, little brother. Even I need a little sugar in my life." Lucifer said jokingly with a playful chuckle, hooking his arm around Gabriel's shoulders. "Looks like you do eat protein after all."

"And looks like you do indulge yourself in sweets."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I recommend you all watch the show—whether it be PASWG or Supernatural—because then you might fully understand what's going on. This fanfic will follow the PASWG storyline, but it will have from twist and turns—as mentioned in the tags. So I hope you continue to read.


	2. And So The Duo Becomes The Three Musketeers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Know how I said "Eventual Smut"? Try soon, like, now. It doesn't last too long, so calm down. But as you already know I'm very descriptive so...you've sorta been warned? Good luck and enjoy!

_Ok, so here's the thing: Everyone knows about the Angels of Sioux Falls._ Everyone. _They were practically celebrities. There was Michael, the eldest Archangel, the Embodiment of Pride. Lucifer, the second eldest Archangel, the Embodiment of Lust. Gabriel, the youngest Archangel, the Embodiment of Gluttony. And Castiel, the little Angel, the Embodiment of Chastity. Each Angels' lifestyle lined up perfectly based on their Sin or Virtue. Or so everyone believed..._

Gabriel whimpered as the unknown man continued to hit his prostate at a ruthless speed, airy moans spilling out from his lips as the man plastered quick and almost unnoticeable kisses along his shoulder. Small pleas flew from Gabriel's mouth, but the man paid no heed and continued to go at the undesirable pace. Chasing his own high until he came. The Archangel groaned with unsatisfactory and weakly pushed at the man. The man simply chuckled, unfazed, pulling his softened cock from Gabriel's abused hole. A dribble of cum dripping onto the ruined sheets.

"Dude," Gabriel panted out, watching out the corner of his eye as his conquest made yet another X on the cheap wallpaper. "I enjoy a good creampie, but I only came twice." He whined, snatching up the sheets with a sharp unsatisfied huff and wrapping them around himself. "Just look at how many times you've cum." Gabriel said, pointing over his head to the eight X's on the wall. "That's not fair ya'know."

"Ya'know sweetheart, you're more of a devil than an angel." The man—a biker—said jokingly and rather smugly, a cocky grin stretching across his face. He was obviously pleased.

"How fucking original." Gabriel mumbled bitterly, rolling his eyes and scooting away from the man. "And by the way, Mick Jagger, leather pants are _not_ flattering on you." He added, rolling onto his stomach and grabbing the remote from the nightstand, turning on the TV. _"This is an incredible turn of events! If you're just joining us, an unnamed sports car..."_ Gabriel squinted to get a better look at the second car. "That's Transparent..." The ringing of his phone then caught his attention and so he answered to avoid any possible dreadful conversation with the biker. "This is Gabriel."

_"Where the hell are you?!"_ Michael yelled angrily, screaming into Gabriel's ear. But the little Archangel kept his cool, thinking of the perfect lie to tell his brother.

"Visiting the elderly at a nursing home." Gabriel claimed with a confident and smooth tone. "It's called being a good upstanding citizen, duh." He added jokingly. Even so, Michael still knew the truth.

_"Don't lie to me!"_ Michael objected. _"You're at the Immortal Hotel!"_ Gabriel cringed, knowing he was caught. _"Get your lazy ass on the battlefield immediately!"_ Michael demanded, finally pushing Gabriel beyond his limits.

"Fine!" Gabriel snapped, frustrated. "It wasn't like this guy was rocking my world or anything!" Quickly hanging up, Gabriel rolled out of bed. Throwing off the covers and snapping his fingers, Gabriel cleaned himself up. Dressing himself in a plain black knee-high sports jersey dress with **GLUTTONY** written across his shoulder blades and **13** on the front in gold. "Sorry." Gabriel apologized halfheartedly, slipping on black tennis shoes. "I gotta go help out my brothers." He explained as he threw on a black leather jacket to complete his look.

"Take my bike." The biker offered. Gabriel scoffed with disinterest. "I'm not kidding, my bike is wicked fast." The man said confidently. "And you know what they say, faster is always better."

"Well guess what, fuckface. A little technique doesn't hurt." Gabriel said, snatching up the man's keys to his motorcycle. "Thanks for the ride."

* * *

Sirens blared up and down the highways, police cars chased after the Ghost and Angels, and destruction was rained down on the civilians as Hell and Heaven raced by at what could have been the speed of light. Lucifer growled angrily as he gripped the steering wheel, the accelerator pressed down to the floor in attempts to keep up with the wannabe Speed Racer.

"Lucifer, please calm down." Castiel requested, leaning into Lucifer's side to try and sooth him. Lucifer just hissed at the Angel, his eyes drifting between the road ahead and the asshole Ghost besides them. "Lucifer, listen!" Castiel yelled, trying to grab the wheel. But Lucifer put an end to that real quick and used his Grace to press Castiel against the passenger side door. "Your recklessness will lead to you crashing the car."

"Yeah, so?" Lucifer inquired, waving Castiel off without a single glance.

"A mere car crash won't kill us, but we will surely feel great pain as an end result!" Castiel retorted. The Ghost—the vile thing taking form of a taxicab—laughed at the brothers, enjoying their arguing. Lucifer quickly snapped back into focus, a murderous look in his eyes.

"Get out of the way losers!" The Taxi Ghost screamed. "That means I'm gonna run your asses over!" He cackled. "And no one can stop me!" The Ghost mocked, his gaze turning to the Angels. Lucifer snarled the Taxi Ghost, crashing Transparent into the Ghost's side in hopes to knock it off balance, but it had no affect.

"C'mon!" Lucifer sneered at his enemy. The ghoul just tsked at the Archangel and retaliated, knocking its body against Transparent.

"You tryna catch me, huh pussycat?" The Taxi Ghost taunted. "Well then, bring it on bitches!" He laughed, roughly nudging against Transparent. "Although I don't think you'll be able to handle what I'm packing, meaning I have a big dick!"

"Shut your filthy pathetic mouth and give me your best shot, nookwhiff!"

Meanwhile  
With Gabriel

"I guess that jerk-off was right." Gabriel said with a snicker, putting the pedal to the metal for the fun of it. "She doesn't roar like Transparent, but she does purr!" Gabriel cheered, swerving pass the slow drivers. Gabriel then turned and exited off the highway, his eyes glancing for any sign of his brothers and the Ghost's whereabouts. However, upon passing by a shopping mall, he heard crashing and screaming, so he stopped to listen in. When he heard the noise getting louder, Gabriel quickly started driving again as two cars crashed through the entrance.

"Gabriel!" Castiel and Lucifer cried out, surprised to see Gabriel there to help out in the fight. The little Archangel laughed, sparing his brothers a wink. 

"What's kickin', motherbitches?" Gabriel greeted cheekily.

"About motherfucking time." Lucifer complained. "Why the fuck didn't you leave a note? You just left."

"That was pretty rude of you." Castiel added in agreement.

"I was getting some dick." Gabriel confessed bluntly, but he wasn't gloating. He was more embarrassed than proud. "Believe me though, he was disappointing. Fucked too fast, came too easily, and he wasn't exactly a sweet talker." He admitted, rolling his eyes with a disappointed sigh.

"Still," Lucifer mumbled, pouting much like an angry bratty child. "I'm usually the one pulling off a dick-n-run."

"Or a clit-n-run." Gabriel added, laughing loudly. "Usually I'm the one on the mission while you're out fucking. But I flipped the switch on you, didn't I, huh big bro?" Lucifer couldn't help but crack a proud smile. Castiel sighed, shaking his head shamefully. The Ghost stared at the three Angels, confused.

"Wait a minute, you three know each other?" The Ghost asked dumbly. The Angels scoffed at the stupid question.

"No shit, fucknut." Gabriel replied in a snarky tone.

"We thought that was pretty obvious from the start, yes." Castiel contributed.

"We're Lucifer, Gabriel, and Castiel." Lucifer said proudly.

"Who?" The Taxi Ghost asked, having not heard of them before.

"We're Angels, dick." Gabriel answered, sticking his tongue out. He then lifted up off the seat of the bike and managed to balance himself on the pegs, sliding his boxers down with ease and transforming them into his beloved pistol—Crotchless. "Now hold still." He said, aiming his gun at the Ghost.

"Check this out." The Ghost snickered. "Take it off!" Without warning the Ghost bumped against Gabriel's bike. Gabriel wobbled clumsily, gripping the handles for control. "I bet you like it rough!" The Taxi Ghost taunted, pushing Gabriel harder against the concrete traffic divider.

"Fuck off!" Gabriel retorted, loosening his grip on the throttle in order to slow down, causing the Ghost to crash into the divider. "I'm gonna enjoy blowing your brains out." Gabriel mumbled to himself. But that's when he realized: Crotchless was gone. "Fuck." Speeding back up, Gabriel guided the motorcycle to ride by Transparent and knocked on Castiel's window. Castiel rolled the window down, giving his brother a curious and puzzled look.

"Gabriel, what are you doing?" Castiel asked, baffled and concerned.

"We have a problem."

"What's wrong?" Castiel asked, still confused and more concerned now.

"It's about Crotchless." Gabriel stated. "My gun is missing."

"Well find it." Castiel said rather dismissively.

"Kinda hard when we're speeding down a highway!"

"Hey, who turned out the lights?" Remembering they were still on a mission, Gabriel turned to their to see quite the sight. There on the Ghost's head were Gabriel's precious boxers.

"My gun is on your face!" He pointed out, before taking a pause. "Well, they're technically my boxers." He said, but he was getting off track and so he snapped out of it. "Who the fuck cares, my boxers are on your face!"

"I can't see! But it sure smells like I'm going fast!" The Ghost joked, licking the lingerie with his disgustingly long tongue. Gabriel growled, his cheeks turning beet red.

"Move over!" He demanded. Without much hesitation, Castiel moved to the back and opened the back door, giving Gabriel the chance to jump off the bike and into the car. "I'm driving." He declared. Lucifer shrugged indifferently, swiftly moving to the passenger side and letting Gabriel take the wheel. Slamming his foot down on the gas. "Go, Transparent, go!"

"Ok, so what's the plan?" Lucifer asked, hopeful and puzzled.

"I don't have one." Gabriel admitted almost immediately. Lucifer gave him a funny look, earning a sigh. "My 'plan' is to get back my boxers, ok?"

"We need something more than that. A way to catch him." Lucifer said with a frustrated huff. "You throwing a hissy fit over a pair of trashy ass boxers isn't doing us much help." He said, narrowing his eyes at the little Archangel.

"Well then, if you have any ideas I'm all for it." Gabriel said, turning to glare at his brother. "If not, shut your fucking mouth." He seethed. Lucifer and Gabriel growled at one another, sparks flying as their glares intensified.

"Here's an idea." Castiel butted in. Gabriel and Lucifer turned around to see Castiel gripping on the seats for dear life. "Eyes on the road!" Snapping their gaze back in front of them, the brothers screamed in terror and surprise as police cars began to rain down on them. "DO SOMETHING!!" Castiel exclaimed. Snapping out of his mini daze, Gabriel began to maneuver around the falling cars, swerving and skidding across the road. Determined. And he stayed determined even when a police car managed to snag off the roof of Transparent. Once they were in the clear, the Angels were able to relax and collect themselves. Analyzing the damage of their beloved car, Castiel's worry and fear turned to rage and hatred. "Now I'm pissed." Castiel hissed. "I'm going to rip him apart."

"I don't think that will be necessary." Lucifer said to his little brother. "Look." He pointed, motioning for Gabriel to stop the car. "The cops actually did something right." He said, gesturing to the Ghost head laying in the middle of the highway. Gabriel scoffed, the Angels stepping out of the car and strutted towards the defeated ghoul until they stood over him.

"Ah, life in the fast lane." Gabriel taunted in a bored tone. "It just makes you finish quicker."

"Just so you know," Castiel slipped off his shoe, taking his legwarmer and swiftly transforming it into his trusty katana. "I'm sure what Gabriel means to say is you're dead." Castiel stated, raising his sword to end the Ghost's life. Until Gabriel blocked it. "What are you-"

"Chill the fuck out!" Gabriel protested. "Let me get my boxers first." He then went to grab his lingerie, but stopped short when he found out both the boxers and the little hermit were gone. Frantically searching, Gabriel ended up finding them seconds later. Looking over the edge of the freeway he saw the Ghost had managed to possess a truck.

"Fuck." The Angels swore in disbelief, but not yet defeat.

"So just to make it _very_ clear, this is all your fault." Castiel said to Gabriel, angry blue eyes narrowed at his big brother.

"I know." Gabriel agreed. "But that's not an excuse to go and fuck up my boxers, ok Cassie?"

"Ya'know boys," Lucifer spoke up, and his brothers perked up at attention. "I think I have an idea." He said with a grin, pointing to the amount of ammo that managed to crash into their car. Gabriel shared the same grin, giddiness bubbling in his very Grace. "Gabe, you thinking what I'm thinking?" Lucifer asked, watching as the Archangel edged towards the weapons. Excitement in his eyes as he rounded up all the guns in the back.

"Already on it." Gabriel said, and then disappeared into thin air. Lucifer then turned to Castiel as he walked to their car, hopping in the front seat while Castiel hadn't moved an inch.

"C'mon Cassie, we gotta roll." Lucifer said, pulling Castiel out of his thoughts.

"What are we going to do to help Gabriel?" Castiel asked, both very worried and very curious.

"We're actually gonna improvise." Lucifer admitted casually. Castiel sighed and made his way over towards Transparent, about to get into the passenger seat when Lucifer stopped him short. "Sorry little bro, but I need you up on the hood." He said. "No questions asked." He added quickly. Castiel frowned, but hopped up on the hood anyway. Making sure his feet were firmly planted on the car to keep him steady. Gripping his sword tightly. Castiel looked over his shoulder and Lucifer flashed him a smirk. "Hang on!"

* * *

And so the Taxi Ghost turned into the Truck Ghost, clearing a path for himself. Crushing cars under his wheels and spilling blood to those who were unlucky and more deserving of life. Meanwhile a nosy ass news helicopter flew overhead, filming the entire disaster. And when he thought he was winning, well...

"Hey fatass!" Gabriel called out, grabbing the attention of the Truck Ghost. All-the-while firing the loaded ammo he snagged, running on top of the abandoned cars. "I got an idea, why don't you let me help you lighten your load?!" He then jumped over the maw of the truck, guns still ablazing, but trying very hard not to fuck up his boxers. Gabriel tumbled, but still landed and just kept firing with all he had. Ignoring the Ghost as he groaned and screamed in pain when Gabriel shot one of the propellers, causing them to turn onto the next exit. That was the last gun. Throwing it over his shoulder, Gabriel couldn't help but grimace at the smell. "Gunpowder smells like old lady perfume." He complained.

"Huh? What, is that all you got, dick-Angel?" The Ghost taunted, acting as if he didn't just get shot at.

"So quick to insult. How cute." Gabriel replied with a scoff. "And yeah, I'm done. My brothers however? Not so much." He said, pointing ahead. The Truck Ghost followed his finger to see quite the surprise.

"No way." Standing on top of Transparent was Castiel, his sword in hand and a blank stare on his face. "I gotta say, your brother has got some massive balls!" Without further warning, the Ghost sped up and knocked Gabriel off the roof. Sending him flying onto the nearby nosy helicopter. Castiel got into a ready stance, his heart beating faster with every inch the foe grew closer. Once close enough, Lucifer sharply swerved the car. Letting out a battle cry, Castiel hacked his blade right through the truck with ease. "Shove it up your exhaust pipe... That means ass!" The Truck Ghost cried out as he flew over the Angels' heads.

"The job is done." Castiel informed his brothers, straightening his stance.

"Did you destroy my boxers?!" Gabriel yelled at Castiel, scolding his brother. "You owe me another pair if you did, those were expensive!"

"Please calm down, Gabriel. The job is done, we're victorious, and he's dead." Castiel said, however he couldn't help but feel wrong.

"Yeah, but the bell should be ringing." Lucifer mentioned, his gaze towards the sky. "That's how it works..." But instead of the church bells ringing, they heard a train whistle. The Angels groaned as a train emerged. The Ghost was back, this time taking the form of a freight train. "Round three, that's impressive." Lucifer admitted.

"If you wanna keep going, we can keep going." Gabriel spoke confidently. "We can do this all night buddy, ask around."

"It's true." Castiel agreed. "Lucifer and Gabriel are quite known for their 'performances'."

"You talk about us like we're hookers." Lucifer coo'd.

"Which is actually really sweet coming from you." Gabriel said, winking at the little Angel. Castiel blushed, scoffing at his brothers as he turned his nose upwards.

"Enough playing around already." Castiel murmured, reading his katana.

"Tsundere." The Archangels joked.

"Cassie's right though, Gabe." Lucifer said, choosing to cut Castiel a break. "Let's get rid of this pest and go home." He said, steering the car off the edge of the freeway to land and ride up to the roof of the train.

"Hey," Gabriel tapped on the glass of the helicopter's window, grabbing the attention of the news crew inside. "I need a favor, I'll make it worth your wild." He said. "I need you to get me close to that Ghost fucker. If you're successful, I'll give you a flash of my boxers." Gabriel negotiated. The crew turned red.

"Y-your boxers?!" The star reporter stuttered, surprise and disbelief. "Yo-you can't be serious!"

"Just do it!" Gabriel demanded, bashing his fist against the glass and causing it to crack. The news crew fell silent and nodded feverishly, not wanting to further anger the Archangel. The pilot sped forward thus getting Gabriel close to the head, where his boxers flew in the breeze like a flag on the antenna of the train. Springing off the helicopter, Gabriel managed to land besides Castiel on top of Transparent. And suddenly, without any warning at all, the Ghost sped up. Faster than the other two times. Castiel and Gabriel both dropped down and gripped onto the hood, while Lucifer kept his foot pressed to the accelerator to kept them on the roof of the train. The Ghost began to babble, but the boys didn't understand. 'Too fast.' Gabriel thought, tightening his grip on the hood. And then suddenly an idea came to Gabriel's head.

"Whatever you're thinking, please, say it now." Castiel said, almost like he knew what Gabriel was thinking.

"Too fast." Gabriel said, speaking his thoughts aloud.

"I don't understand." Castiel said, flashing his brother a confused glance.

"You don't have to." Gabriel replied. "I just need your help."

"Then let's do this."

"Guys?" Lucifer spoke, wondering why his brothers were slowly loosening their grip on the hood. "What the hell are you doing?" He asked concerned.

"I have a plan." Gabriel stated as Castiel let go of his grip on the car, scaring the daylights out of Lucifer, "Don't worry, we're coming back." Gabriel assured him, before finally letting go and letting the wind carry him away. Lucifer thought about chasing after them, but then Gabriel flew over his head. Watching as Gabriel tore his boxers off the antenna and transformed them into his beloved pistol. Crashing onto the Ghost's face, Gabriel smirked.

"Um, sorry?" The Ghost tried, but Gabriel scoffed.

"Yeah, look, I'm done here." He replied in a teasing manner. "It's not me, it's you." Gabriel said, cocking his pistol. "Repent you motherfucker." Pulling the trigger, the Ghost blew to bits. The train—or what was left of it—crashed at the end of the line. And so it was done. Gabriel sighed in relief, floating down into the passenger seat of Transparent.

"Gabriel." Turning around, Gabriel smiled upon seeing Castiel sitting patiently in the backseat.

"It's finally over." Gabriel said, relief laced in his voice. "Thanks for catching me back there. If you didn't, I would've been blown away." Castiel shrugged halfheartedly, choosing not to mention that he actually almost _did_ blow away.

"You're welcome."

"So how many coins did we get?" Lucifer asked as he pulled off, heading back to the church.

"Three Heavens." Gabriel replied, counting their earnings.

"Big, fast, and disappointing." Lucifer joked. "Although, what more could you expect?"

"I'll say." Gabriel said, agreeing. "I'm never wearing these again." He said, pinching his boxers, a disgusted grimace on his face. "Cassie?" He held up his boxers to his little brother, in hopes to get rid of the undergarment. Castiel nodded, taking his legwarmer and shifting it into his katana, slicing up the boxers into pieces wordlessly and swiftly. "Thanks. Again."

"I'll buy you more." Castiel promised.

"Thanks. For, like, the third time now." Gabriel said with a goofy smile. "Today has been a long day." He said, lying back in his seat. "Missions don't usually take that long."

"And how." Lucifer and Castiel agreed.

"So what now?" Gabriel asked curiously. "Just got home and go straight to bed?"

"How 'bout we go home, take a nice long shower, eat some junk food, and watch a movie?" Lucifer suggested.

"Oh! The movie should be something funny." Gabriel piped up.

"Or something with gore." Lucifer said as a suggestion.

"Or both. Like Little Shop of Horrors or Scream." Castiel said, thinking of movies that they all might favor.

"Or maybe a Chucky film!" Gabriel cheered, practically shaking in his seat. For the rest of the ride the brothers suggested film after film, before the topic switched to snacks and drinks, and then switched to a bunch of nonsense.

Later that night  
The Angels' Residence

"What's all this?" Michael asked, baffled and amused. There were bits of popcorn scattered on the floor and coffee table, a big empty bowl laying upside-down on the carpet and a large wooden spoon set besides it, numerous of sweets tangled in Gabriel's golden locks, and movies stacked in messy piles next to the couch. The ending credits of Nerve rolling on screen while Gabriel and Castiel slept peacefully. The two Angels practically laying on each other; Castiel had his head rested on Gabriel's chest and Gabriel had his head rested on the armrest while his arms were wrapped around his baby brother.

"We got bored." Lucifer answered casually, shrugging halfheartedly and unapologetically. "Wanna join me?" He asked, patting the empty space to his right. "The wimps fell asleep in the middle of the joyride scene." Lucifer joked as Michael edged towards the couch. "C'mon, sit down, you pussy." Lucifer smirked, tossing a handful of sweets at his brother. Michael rolled his eyes with a small playful huff, picking the candied treats off the ground and throwing them back at Lucifer. "That's the spirit." He mumbled, his devious smirk transforming to a soft smile. "Hell, if you want, you could even pick the movie."

"You really want _me_ to pick the film?" Michael asked, cocking a curious brow.

"Yeah, sure, if you want I mean." Lucifer said with another shrug. "I have popcorn." He added, gesturing to the half-full bowl of popcorn that sat on the coffee table. Michael chuckled and nodded in agreement, looking through the pile of movies until he saw one that interested him: Spectre 007. "That's a good movie. I think I like Octopussy better though." Lucifer said, snickering to himself at the innuendo.

"Of course." Michael said, shaking his head playfully as he popped in the film. "I missed this." He said, taking a seat next to Lucifer.

"Me too." Lucifer agreed, resting his head on Michael's shoulder. The brothers snuggled together as the movie started. "I saw you." He then said, earning a hum in response. "Back on the 'battlefield'." Lucifer stated, mumbling, almost like he was telling a secret. "I saw you. You were watching."

"I was." Michael said, nodding. "You're right, I was watching."

"Why?" Lucifer asked, interested and puzzled.

"I wanted to see how Castiel would do on a mission." Michael explained. "And he passed the test."

"Good." Lucifer said, a satisfied smile creeping on his face. "So does that mean Cassie is officially apart of Team Angel?"

"Yes." Michael replied. "Also, we're going to need a new team name. 'Team Angel' is too obvious."

"Eh, I'll work on it."


	3. All Hail The Angels

Two screams were met that morning as Lucifer and Gabriel crashed landed. The two Archangels settled on the red couch once again, nestled in their blankets.

"You're gonna stop doing this!" Lucifer snapped immediately in complaint, cranky from having been woken up so rudely. "Can't you give us a fucking break? Seriously, it has been a whole week since the last Ghost attack!"

"Good morning to you too." Michael greeted in a monotone voice, not the least bit fazed by Lucifer's sour mood.

"Geez, a guy can't masturbate in peace around here?" Gabriel whined, clearly unsatisfied as he buried himself in his golden sheets. "Seriously Michael, this is Angel abuse."

"Now that you two are finally here, I would like you to meet someone." Michael said, continuing to ignore his brothers' complaining. Lucifer and Gabriel instantly perked up, fully awake at this newly heard announcement.

"Your pimp?" Lucifer guessed.

"Your hooker?" Gabriel asked.

"Your fuckbuddy?" Lucifer tried.

"Your _fuckbuddies_?" Gabriel inquired.

"Lucifer, Gabriel," Ignoring their wild accusations, Michael pushed forward a chubby man dressed in a suit and tie with a pair of browline glasses. "I would like you to meet Donatello Redfield. Your new principal." He stated, gesturing to the older man. Donatello gave the Archangels a relaxed smile and carefree wave in greeting.

"Donatello?" Gabriel repeated, rolling the name around for a moment, feeling as if he heard that name somewhere before. "Like the prophet in the Ancient Scrolls, Donatello?" Gabriel asked curiously.

"That would be him." Michael answered, happy Gabriel remembered such an ancient thing as the Scrolls of Heaven.

"Wait? Rewind." Lucifer spoke up. "Did you say 'principal'?" He asked, and Michael nodded. It took him about a second to realize what was going on. "We're going back to school?!"

"Just because you're Angels, doesn't mean you can't get a proper education—by human standards." He explained. "Besides, you have another mission that takes place right on campus. The perfect excuse if I do say so myself."

"How come Cassie gets a free pass?" Gabriel whined in complaint, crossing his arms with a stubborn pout.

"He doesn't. Castiel is actually coming with you." Michael stated, pointing to their baby brother, who was ready to go. "Don't worry, you're not living on campus, just going to school there." Michael assured his brothers. "It isn't even that far from here so quit acting like Fledglings."

"Well what's the school name?"

"University of Sioux Falls." Michael and Donatello replied. Lucifer and Gabriel rolled their eyes at the obvious name choice, but knew they had to go anyway despite all their protests.

"Fine, we'll go." Lucifer agreed reluctantly, sighing heavily.

"I just have one question." Gabriel said, raising his hand. "Where's the nearest bakery?"

Later that morning  
University of Sioux Falls

"We're supposed to be undercover." Castiel informed, reminding his older brothers that they weren't supposed to be causing a scene of any sort. Crashing onto campus and rolling out a fucking red carpet was _clearly_ causing a scene. "So much for being incognito..."

"Well I wanted to make a grand entrance." Lucifer replied simply, swiftly swiping off his shades to examine the student body. "Not bad, not bad at all."

"We're here on a mission, not more conquests or candied treats." Castiel said, repeating Michael's rules. "So please, behave yourselves."

"Loosen up, Cassie." Gabriel said, roughly petting his little brother's head. "Also you should stick with me and Luci while we're here. You'll learn a thing or two." He said, winking. Castiel sighed again, opening up the campus map Michael gave him.

"Where do we look first?" Lucifer asked, looking over Castiel's shoulder.

"We're here." Castiel pointed out, gesturing to the Main Quad. "Students have reported screams near the campus fountain-"

"Aw shit!" Gabriel interrupted loudly. "They have a café on campus called Spoiled Rotten!" He pointed out on the map. "That sounds too good to be true, like Heaven! That's where we should start the search!" Gabriel cheered greedily, turning around to run into some random direction. Except he managed to bump into some random person. And although he fell back, this person—this man—was able to catch him.

"I'm so sorry." The man apologized. Gazing up at his savior, Gabriel meet with hazel eyes.

"H-hi." Gabriel greeted, awestruck. No, not awestruck. Moonstruck. Which was strange because he was usually the one who left people in a daze and stuttering like fools.

"Hey." The man greeted back, smiling down at Gabriel rather fondly. "I'm Sam Winchester."

"Like the rifle?" Gabriel asked curiously, and Sam nodded. "I'm Gabriel." He said, pushing himself off of Sam.

"You're that Archangel." Sam said, looking down at Gabriel with a look of realization and disbelief.

"You know who I am?" Gabriel asked shocked, and Sam nodded with a chuckle.

"You and your brothers are all over the news." He pointed out. Before Gabriel could get another word in, the crowd around him started cheering.

"What's going on?" Gabriel asked, puzzled.

"Wera is here." Sam answered in a bored tone.

"Wera?" Gabriel repeated. "What kind of name is that?"

"It means 'victory bearer' in Greek." Sam stated. "Listen, Wera is Queen Spider around here. She rules the school, so please be careful." Sam warned the Archangel. Gabriel merely scoffed. "I'm serious."

"I know you are, Sammy." Gabriel said. "But I'm an Archangel. I ain't gonna get down on my knees for this chick." He said, glancing over his shoulder. "And my brothers will gladly agree." Gabriel added, as Lucifer and Castiel headed in their direction.

"What's going on here?" Lucifer asked puzzled and interested, looking Sam up and down.

"We were just talking about some 'Spider Queen' bitch." Gabriel replied, waving a dismissive hand. "Just stick to 'Queen Bee'. I mean, it's a classic title."

"I know someone isn't gossiping about **moi**." The boys turned at attention upon hearing the light cheap voice, to which belonged to a young woman. She had shoulder length blonde hair, porcelain skin, and striking pale blue eyes. She wore a purple cheerleader uniform with the school's letters and mascot on the front, matching tennis shoes, and a gold tiara. She was even sitting on top of a throne. The football players were carrying it and the cheer squad followed close behind. It was Wera herself.

"Oh, but we are." Gabriel sassed, sending Wera a cheeky smirk. Wera glared down at the Archangel from her tower of followers, clenching her jaw. "Aw, am I bugging you?" Wera simply and soundly tsked at the joke, clearly upset, much to Gabriel's pleasure. "Look, you don't know who we are, so let's get the introductions out the way."

"My name is Lucifer, I'm an Archangel and the second eldest."

"I'm Gabriel, the youngest Archangel."

"I am Castiel, an Angel of the Lord."

"Well then, I'm Wera, the Queen Spider of Sioux Falls University." Wera said, sounding both bold and ignorant. "I get that you three are new here, but let me make something clear. My name is Wera, as you already know. But you may also call me Queen, Her Majesty, or Goddess. Allow them to demonstrate." She said, snapping her fingers.

"Hail Wera, Queen Wera, Her Majesty, Goddess!" The crowd cheered, much to Wera's pleasure.

"As I said," Wera continued. "I'm the Queen Arachne around here and I rule this school, so it would be best to follow orders." Wera said smugly. Lucifer scoffed, rolling his eyes upon witnessing Wera's snotty behavior. 'What the fuck is this, high school?' And he thought he and Gabriel were bad.

"Listen asshole," He spoke up. "I'll be damned if I bow down to some plastic bitch like you." Lucifer said, shocking the students. Nobody ever talked to Wera like that. "I'm a fucking Archangel, so it would be best if you put some respect on my name."

"And mine." Gabriel and Castiel said, their tone stern and expressions hard.

"Gabriel, Castiel," Turning to Sam, Lucifer realized he didn't know the name of his new friend. So he just said the first thing that came to mind: "Moose." Waving his hand, Lucifer walked away, motioning the others to follow. "We're leaving." As the four of them walked away from the scene, Sam felt his cellphone buzz in pocket. The device chirped: _"Text message bitch!"_ A notification.

"Who's that?" Gabriel asked, deciding to be nosey. Sam dug in his pocket and took out his phone, unlocking it to see the text was from Dean.

"Just my older brother." Sam answered, sending Dean a text back before pocketing his phone.

"I'm not exactly satisfied with that answer." Gabriel said, pursing his lips into a bored pout.

"I don't know what else to tell you." Sam said with a chuckle.

"For starters, you could tell me your major. Yours and your brother's, maybe?" Gabriel suggested. "If you don't then I'll just find out for myself."

"Fine." Sam said, giving in. "I major in law while my brother majors in art."

"A lawyer and an artist." Gabriel said, nodding in approval. "Is there room for three, possibly five, Angels?" He asked curiously.

"Family doesn't end in blood." Sam said, thus giving Gabriel his answer.

"That's cute." Gabriel said with a bright smile. "Who told you that?"

"A wise and pit-bull of a man named Bobby Singer." Sam said, making Gabriel laugh. "After my Dad died, Bobby took me and Dean in. We thought we were just wasting his time at first. But one day he said, 'Boys don't be stupid. Family doesn't end in blood. Now shut up and have a beer with me.'"

"No." Gabriel said, shaking his head in denial, but Sam was dead serious. "He didn't!"

"He did." Sam said, and the two shared a laugh. "Oh, I think this is your stop." He said, pointing to where Lucifer and Castiel were waiting.

"Do I get to see you around?" Gabriel said, giving Sam his best puppy pout.

"Let me see your schedule." Sam requested. Gabriel immediately dug into his pocket, pulling out a crumbled piece of parchment paper, and placed it in the man's outstretched hand. Sam then took out his own schedule and compared the two. "Luckily you have two free periods with me." He said, but Gabriel wasn't satisfied. "Might not be much, but it _is_ something."

"I guess." Gabriel said, shrugging halfheartedly. But then he smiled and gave Sam a wink before skipping away. At least he could talk to Sam freely, right? "See you around, Samquatch."

* * *

"Cute." Lucifer said, grinning at the figurine in his hand. It was him. Whoever made it had got his cocky grin and cool blue eyes spot on. When he turned the model upside-down, he saw there was a gold wind-up key attached to the bottom of the blue platform the figurine was standing on. Taking the key, Lucifer quickly found the hole the key belonged to and began to wind it up, only to blush when he heard himself singing. _"Silver light. She turned her face up to the starlit sky. And on this night began to wonder shy. She knew that soon the day would come."_

"Daughter of The Moon. An original song created by YouTuber Adrisaurus." Gabriel said, chuckling in amusement.

"It's a great song, ok." Lucifer said sheepishly, his blush worsening. "Don't judge me."

"Fine, fine." Gabriel replied, earning a stubborn huff in response. "Ya'know I heard some guy made it for you." Gabriel then said, flipping through his magazine. "I don't know his name, but I _do_ know he heard you singing in the concert hall and just had to record you for the figurine." He explained, glancing at his big brother. Lucifer was smiling, listening to the mini Archangel sing. Suddenly Sam came into the lounge. Bumping into people while trying to get to the three Angels. And when he did, he instantly fell to his knees and panted for breath.

"Hey Sammy." Lucifer greeted, unfazed and amused. "Nice entrance." He joked, earning a glare.

"Sup Moosie." Gabriel greeted, flashing the Winchester a cheery smile. "Fancy seeing you here. It isn't even your free period yet."

"Hello Sam." Castiel greeted, giving Sam a tiny smile. "Is something the matter?"

"Guys, I really need your help." Sam said, receiving confused expressions in response. "My friends, Jess and Brady, have disappeared." He informed. "I know it sounds unlikely, but I know them, something isn't right." Sam said hurriedly.

"Calm down, Sammy." Gabriel said concerned, placing a hand on Sam's shoulder. "We'll find them." He said reassuringly.

"You will?"

"Duh!" Gabriel laughed. "We're Angels. It's kind of our job."

Later that night  
Football field

"I don't get it. We've looked everywhere, that means they have to be here." Sam said, combing a hand through his hair in worry.

"Stop worrying yourself, Samster." Gabriel said, patting Sam's back in comfort. "We'll find them."

"Well if it isn't the Holy Whores of Sioux Falls." Turning around the quartet came face to face with seemed to be a tower of football players and cheerleaders with Wera standing at the top. "I thought you would find me here. Although it took you long enough."

"Not you again." Lucifer groaned loudly. "Of course you would choose the stadium as your hideout."

"Shouldn't you be wallowing in the trash?" Gabriel taunted. "Also, that entrance was way too big for you." He added with Lucifer nodding in agreement.

"Please, I have the most biggest entrances in the whole school." Wera boasted, sounding rather smug and proud of herself.

"Wow." Gabriel deadpanned. "You must be one loose bitch." Castiel sighed heavily and shook his head in shame, while Lucifer laughed like there was no tomorrow. 'These are the Angels that save us from Ghosts everyday?' Sam thought, not knowing whether to laugh or fear for his life. He didn't think they would be so...playful. "I could call a few doctors for ya' if that would help, but just know your pussy ain't never gonna be the same." Gabriel said, snickering to himself. Castiel tsked and slapped Gabriel in the back of the head. "What?! It's true!"

"As childish and degrading as that was, it was almost cute. But we'll see how cute you are when I'm finished with you." Wera declared, jumping down from her tower of followers and landing perfectly on her feet. "However," She then snapped her fingers, signaling her followers to part like the sea. And they did. To reveal a giant spider web with two cocoons laying on top. "I thought you would want to know what I really am." Suddenly skin tore apart and bones cracked. Her pale skin shifted to tar black and her blue eyes turned a bright sickly yellow. Wera was no longer human, but a giant spider. A Ghost. Her true form.

"Could this have been anymore predictable?" Lucifer whispered to Gabriel.

"I know, right." Gabriel whispered back in agreement. "She's a queen, she's a spider, we fucking get it!" Gabriel huffed. "Life is such a disappointment sometimes."

"Ya'know something, Wera, we could show off too." Lucifer said, a smirk stretching across his face.

"Cassie, you helping?" Gabriel asked curiously.

"If I must." Castiel said. "I want to see how strong I've gotten."

"Sammy, you might wanna stand back." Gabriel told the Winchester, and Sam obeyed. "Ready gang?"

"Let's fucking do this." Lucifer said, stretching his arms over his head with a loud yawn. "I'm getting fucking bored just standing around."

"I agree." Castiel spoke. "I say we get things over with now."

"Repent!"

 

_Raising his hand, a glowing halo appeared above Lucifer's head. Throwing it down, the Archangel created a dancefloor. A performance space for himself and his brothers. Lucifer wore a white sleeveless button-front vest top, white shorts with a gold belt that had a rouge heart attached and a matching gold chain to hang from his belt buckle, a gold leather O-ring choker, gold coiled armbands, a single gold dovetail bangle on his left wrist, and gold gladiator sandals accompanied by his striped stockings. Gabriel was clad in a white tunic coupled with a silver belt that had a golden heart attached, a white lace choker, silver bangles, long white fingerless lace gauntlets, and silver knee-high gladiator sandals. Castiel donned a white sleeveless turtleneck crop top, white skinny jeans paired with a bronze belt that had raven black hearts attached to either side of his hips, a thick white leather choker with a bronze heart, and his blue legwarmers topped with bronze gladiator sandals. Halos and wings flashed, giving them a more graceful appearance. Lucifer and Gabriel spun onto the poles, completely in sync as they dipped back and hooked their leg around the pole, performing a Gemini. Expressions of pure bliss on their face as their wings and halos flashed again. Castiel climbed and spun around the pole, the cold metal settling between his legs as he spun and glided through the air, performing a Viva Seat. Eyes fluttering close, his wings and halo flashing as he continued to float through the air. Slowly and skillfully, the Angels swiftly twirled off their poles, spinning on the balls of their feet to present themselves to their audience. Lucifer glided his hands down his sides, sliding to the floor. Castiel ghosted his hands over his stomach while Lucifer glided his hands down his sides, both Angels slipping to the floor in unison. Gabriel combed his hands through his hair, tugging on the strands and moaning with every pull._

_**Oh pitiful shadow lost in darkness;**_

_Gabriel flashed a smile as he blew a kiss, slipping his hands between his legs, teasing himself._

_**Oh evil spirit born of those drifting between Heaven and Earth;**_

_Staying in sync, Lucifer and Castiel removed their garments, giving each other gummy smiles._

_**May the thunderous power from these holy delicate men strike down upon you with great vengeance and furious anger**_

_Gabriel bent over, taking off his boxers all-the-while smirking confidently._

_**Shattering your loathsome impurities and returning you from once you came.**_

_Lucifer, Gabriel, and Castiel held up their garments. Grins on their faces as the lingerie started glowing dimly._

_**Repent you motherfucker!**_

 

"I say for this performance, we should unleash a bit more." Gabriel said, as the light burst to present his pistol. Lucifer and Castiel nodded in agreement. Giving each other knowing glances, Lucifer and Castiel threw their glowing lingerie in the air. Lucifer and Castiel quickly discarded the remaining stocking and legwarmer, before extending their hands to catch the falling transformed weapons. Lucifer's twin scythes, Hellfire and Hellion. Castiel's twin katana, Diaphanous and Irenic.

"It has been so long since I've used both of my weapons." Lucifer said, spinning his beloved weapons with ease. "So," Lucifer then turned to Castiel and watched as the little Angel wielded his weapons with a warrior's passion. His stance graceful and strong. "Castiel, how does it feel? This power?"

"Incredible." Castiel answered, flashing his brother a smile as he unleashed his wings. The pair of wings were smaller than his brothers, but strong like theirs. The feathers were a thick raven black, much like a black hole or Castiel's eyes. The way they suck you in. "However I would rather not waste this power by common chit-chat." Castiel declared, his face turning neutral. "We've all waited long enough."

"Agreed." Lucifer replied.

"Finally." Wera hissed. "Attack, my children!" She commanded, sending the football players and cheerleaders to defend her.

"Pathetic." Lucifer tsked, as he and Gabriel unleashed their wings. "Like Castiel said, let's not waste time."

"Ready?!" Gabriel screamed. "Hike!" He cheered, flying at his enemies with great speed, all-the-while shooting randomly.

"Need I remind you, this isn't your typical run n' gun, Gabriel!" Castiel scolded, flying after his reckless brother. Lucifer huffed out a chuckle, watching as his brothers fought with great skill and swiftness. He then turned to Sam, not at all surprised to see the Winchester still there.

"Wanna have a go?" Lucifer asked, holding out one of his scythes—Hellfire—to Sam. Sam stared at the weapon in disbelief before shaking his head.

"I don't think I'll be able to handle it." Sam said, smiling warily. Lucifer hummed, interested, before nodding in understand and flying after his brothers to join the fight.

"Is this where you ran off to?" Looking besides him, Sam met with Dean's lazy smirk and bemused tired eyes. "I didn't take you for much of a sports fan." Dean said, barely stifling a yawn. "What's happening?" He asked curiously, pointing to the current battle happening in front on him.

"Angels versus spiders, I think." Sam said, shrugging halfheartedly. Dean hummed in interest, nodding in understanding. "Yo!" The Winchester boys then turned their attention to Gabriel. The Archangel hovering off the ground, looking ever-so gleeful. "INCOMING!" He exclaimed, pointing over their heads. Both of them looked up and was surprised to see a football coming towards them. Holding out his hands, Dean caught the ball effortlessly. "Nice catch!" Gabriel praised. "Now run, pretty boys, run!" Gabriel instructed, cackling as the football team came stomping after them. Dean and Sam glanced at one another with panicked expressions, before they turned around and started sprinting away from the incoming danger.

"This is all your fault!" Dean yelled, tossing Sam the football.

"Don't give this to me, you caught it!" Sam retorted, tossing the ball back to Dean.

"Well I don't want it!" Dean protested, getting ready to throw the ball back, when Sam turned a corner. "What the fuck, Sammy?!"

"Just follow my lead!" Sam retorted. With the grumbled, Dean followed instructed, and that's when he saw what Sam was doing. Because they were throwing the football back and forth, they managed to confuse the players. Now half of them were following Sam and the other half were following Dean. "Oh three!" Sam called out as they grew closer.

"On three!" Dean repeated.

"One..."

"Two..."

"Three!" The Winchesters then turned another corner, causing the football players to collide and knock themselves out. Sam and Dean stared at the football team, who laid unconscious at their feet, before they started laughing in triumph.

"Touchdown!" Dean cheered, throwing the football down, now fully awake. "Kiss my ass, dickheads!"

"Dean, wait." Sam said, causing his brother to pause. "What _is_ that?" He asked, pointing. Sam and Dean then crept closer to the knocked out players, and were surprised when they saw thin golden yellow webbing coming from the nape of their necks. And at the end of those webs were small black spiders the size of Sam's thumbnail. "Guys, we have a situation!" Sam cried out, calling for the Angels.

"I understand now." Castiel said, popping up behind Sam and Dean, thus scaring the living daylights out of them. "Wera was controlling them the entire time." He said, staring at the spiders with disgust. "I'll take care of the football team, you warn Lucifer and Gabriel." Castiel told the Winchesters. "I fear if they get too impatient, they'll start getting too violent." Dean and Sam nodded, turning around to let Lucifer and Gabriel in on the news.

"Lucifer! Gabriel!" Dean and Sam yelled, calling to the Archangels, while they continued to fend off the cheerleaders. Sadly the Winchesters were ignored. "Lucifer! Gabriel!" They tried again, but no response.

"They're ignoring us." Sam groaned, scrubbing his face.

"No shit." Dean sighed, combing a hand through his hair. That's when it got dark. "Did the lights just blow out or something?" He asked, and Sam shook his head feverishly, pointing up.

"Look what we have here." Wera said from above, tying the brothers up with her webs and picking them up. "It seems I have been brought a snack." She said with a loud laugh.

"Fuck you." Dean hissed, spitting in her face. Wera growled, shaking her head to rid the saliva.

"I think I'll eat you first."

"I suggest you don't, see I don't taste all that good." Dean joked dryly. "My brother doesn't taste all that great either." He added quickly. "All sweat and salad dressing, I assure you."

"SILENCE, YOU PEST!" Wera exclaimed in anger.

"That's funny coming from you, Wera." A flash of gold then blinded the Winchesters, who were then stunned when they saw Gabriel standing on Wera's shoulders. "Safe landing, boys." Gabriel said to the brothers, before shooting Wera's hands. The Queen Spider screamed in pain, dropping the boys to the ground to tend to her wounded hands. Dean and Sam gasped for air as they hit the ground, winded.

"You'll pay!"

"Is that right?" Gabriel asked, shoving his pistol into her mouth. "Ya'know, I'm getting tired of your lousy mouth." He said with a sigh. "Bon appétit, Mademoiselle Wera!" The gun then fired off and not soon after did Wera explode. The Queen Spider was no more. Floating down to the ground in front of Dean and Sam, Gabriel counted the Heaven Coins.

"How many?" Castiel asked, looking over Gabriel's shoulder.

"Eight." Gabriel replied. "Cheap bitch." He huffed, giving Castiel the golden coins.

"That's more than we usually get." Castiel pointed out, pocketing the Heaven Coins. "Now," Castiel then turned his gaze to Sam and Dean, his eyes pinpointed on the newcomer. "I believe we haven't met before." He said, pointing to Dean.

"Hey." Dean greeted.

"Hello." Castiel greeted, bemusement and curiosity in his eyes.

"Sup." Gabriel greeted, giving Dean a cocky smile. "So, what's your relationship with Sammy-boy?" He asked, the joking and playful gleam in his eyes turning protective.

"My name is Dean Winchester." Dean replied. "Sam's older brother." He stated, much to Gabriel's relief. Although, Gabriel didn't know why he really cared. "Who's that?" Dean then asked, pointing to the Archangel with dusty pink wings, carrying Jess and Brady bridal style in his arms with such ease.

"That's our older brother." Gabriel answered proudly. Lucifer then landed besides Gabriel and Castiel. Once he did, Jess pushed Brady out of her lap.

"Thanks for the ride." Jess said grateful. "But next time, just carry passengers one by one." She said, earning a hearty chuckle.

"I'm _not_ even that heavy." Brady groaned.

"Yeah, yeah." Jess said, rolling her eyes as she jumped out of Lucifer's arms, helping Brady stand.

"Dean," Sam spoke up, earning everyone's attention. "I would like you to meet Lucifer." He said, introducing the Archangel. "Lucifer, this is my older brother. His name is Dean."

"H-hi." Lucifer stammered, blushing under Dean's gaze. He didn't know why he stuttered or why he was suddenly so shy, but this newcomer...

"Hey." Dean mumbled, suddenly awestruck upon realizing this was him: the angel singing in the concert hall. He didn't think the guy was really going to be an Angel, an Archangel nonetheless. The two continued to stare at each other, cheeks rosy, and words caught in their throats. Rolling his eyes, Sam coughed into his fist which caused Lucifer and Dean to jump.

"Anyway, thank you again for saving us." Jess said gratefully, for both herself and Brady.

"It's our job, really, it was nothing." Lucifer said coolly.

"I guess this officially makes you the new Kings of this university." Jess then added.

"Kings?" Gabriel and Lucifer asked, curiously and a bit doubtful.

"Kings?" Castiel asked, a bit frightened and mostly concerned.

"Kings?" Sam and Dean asked, baffled and stunned.

"Kings." Jess answered plainly, nodding. Gabriel and Lucifer were left bemused by this new development, before they gave each knowing glances and cocky smirks, their doubt completely vanishing. Castiel sighed heavily in grief and worry.

"Guess that makes you boys our lackeys." Gabriel said, eyes focused on the Winchesters.

"I just got here." Dean protested. "Don't we get a say in this?" He asked, gesturing to him and Sam. Gabriel and Lucifer hummed, as if in deep thought, before declaring bluntly in perfect unison:

"No." Dean sighed in defeat while Sam chuckled silently.

"This is gonna be a long semester."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Surprise! The Winchesters finally appear! Now personally, I was so eager to write this chapter.
> 
> So now you've met Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Castiel, Chuck, and Amara. Now we have Donatello, Sam, Dean, Jess, and Brady. Who else shall we meet as this adventure continues?
> 
> One Winchester equals trouble. Two Winchesters equals double trouble. Paired with the Angels, they're in for hell of a ride.


	4. Don't Cry Over Stolen Pudding

_Everyone knows Lucifer and Gabriel are as close as siblings can be, but when they fight it can get pretty nasty pretty quickly..._

"Gone! Gone! Gone! Someone stole it! It isn't here anymore, damnit!" Gabriel cried out, angry tears prickling at the corners of his eyes as he threw open a window. It was too much to just keep bottled up. He couldn't help but scream his heart out. " **NOOOOOOOOO!** " Gabriel screeched, outraged and horrified. Lucifer, however, was irritated and tired. Claiming it was too early for his brother's bullshit.

"My hangover is saying you're too fucking loud." Lucifer complained, rolling his eyes. "Unless you're missing your period or something." He joked dryly. Gabriel hastily wiped the stray tears away, pulling himself back inside and slamming the window shut.

"This is no time for your dumbass jokes right now, Lucifer!" Gabriel snipped, clearly upset. "It would be nice if you showed you cared." He grumbled. Lucifer sighed dramatically.

"What's the matter, Gabe?" Lucifer asked, rolling his eyes once again. "Lose your mind?" He added jokingly. He just couldn't help himself.

"My pudding is gone, you dick!" Gabriel yelled angrily, taking out a Heavenly Sweets catalog. "Pud-ding!" Gabriel shoved the catalog in Lucifer's face, displaying the Panna Cotta pudding he ordered. "It was specially ordered from Heaven and there's a 500 year waiting list!" He explained, tearing up the magazine. "Damnit! That pudding is legendary!"

"And?" Lucifer inquired dismissively. Gabriel glared at his brother. "It can't be as legendary as you claim. A Panna Cotta was originally created on Earth. Heaven merely copied and modified the recipe. Hell, if you want it so badly just order the pudding from one of the cafés on Earth." Lucifer said, but Gabriel just stared at Lucifer with narrowed eyes. Lucifer wouldn't understand Gabriel's dilemma. Gabriel paid for the pudding himself with his own hard earned money. It was rightfully his and now it was gone, meaning all his efforts was a waste of money and energy. "My question is why open up shops in Heaven? What, now the Angels want to be civilized or something?" Lucifer asked, joking dryly. Gabriel just continued to stare at his brother with angry narrowed eyes, his cheeks turning pink. Lucifer frowned. "What?"

"No fucking way." Gabriel mumbled, clenching his fists. "You ate it. Didn't you?!" He questioned, but Lucifer shrugged with a careless _uhn-uhn_. "Don't you 'uhn-uhn' me!"

"Why do you assume it was me?" Gabriel then gripped his chin, earning a sputter of surprise from his brother.

"I'm not assuming." Gabriel murmured, digging his dull nails into Lucifer's skin to keep Lucifer from moving. Tilting his head back and turning his head to the side, Gabriel growled upon spotting a smudge of thick raspberry sauce on his cheek. "I knew it was you!" Gabriel yelled, snatching his hand away as if Lucifer burned him. "I can't believe you just fucking sat there and boldface lied to my face! You knew it was mine, Lucifer! I paid for that damn pudding and you still ate it!"

"Calm down, will ya'? Geez..." Lucifer mumbled, wiping the sauce from his face. "So I ate your fucking fancy pudding, big whoop." He grumbled, avoiding Gabriel's angry gaze. "It didn't taste that good anyway. Too sweet."

"You knew it was mine, Lucifer. It had my name on it and you knew it was gonna be sugary sweet, you dick, what the fuck?!" Gabriel screamed, his pink cheeks quickly turning red.

"Aww! You really are Mikey's little Fledgling." He taunted, cooing teasingly.

"JESUS!!" Gabriel exclaimed in frustration. "You always have to fuck up everything, don't you?!" He raged, stomping his foot like a spoiled child or an angsty teenager. Lucifer rolled his eyes.

"You're being so melodramatic." Lucifer claimed dismissively.

"Oh really?" Gabriel inquired, quickly taking out a few photos and then showing Lucifer a picture of his room. The bedroom surprising clean for such a rowdy Archangel as himself. "This is my room." He stated proudly, before swapping out the picture. Showing Lucifer a photo of the current state of his room. The cave of wonders was messy and not exactly pleasant to look at, which was odd for such a classy Archangel as himself. "Yours looks like a hoarder's asshole exploded!" Gabriel was just getting started, still trying to get his point across. "Look at your toilet! Look at your bathtub! Look at what you put in your mouth and I'm not just talking about clit or dick!" Gabriel ranted angrily, violently ripping up the pictures. "You're nothing but a filthy hoebaging thief!"

"Babycakes, hush up." Lucifer coo'd, hugging his little brother. "You're all flustered. You need some inner fucking peace." He said teasingly, flashing Gabriel a playful smile. But the little Archangel just pushed him away.

"I do not understand how I could ever be related to you."

"Try these." Lucifer offered, holding up a bag of chips. Gabriel read the label: Volcano Jalapeño. "I'll let you steal some of my food if that will make you feel better." Gabriel huffed, clearly not satisfied, and slapped the bag of the chips out of his brother's hand. The bag falling to the ground and chips spilling out onto the floor. "Look hooker, I'm trying to be fucking nice here." Lucifer said harshly, but Gabriel was unfazed by his rudeness.

"You should already know that I don't particularly care for spicy food." Gabriel reminded his big brother, sounding almost robotic. "Ever heard of having an acquired taste?"

"Acquired taste, huh?" Lucifer repeated, scoffing. "You do realize that if you only eat sugary shit you'll only get fat, fatty-mc-fatterson." He taunted, flashing his brother a snarky smirk. Gabriel growled. Lucifer knew he was sensitive about his weight.

"Well you wanna know something, flatty-mc-flatterson?" Gabriel straightened himself and placed his fists on his hips, twisting his body to show off his shapely assets. "All the weight I gain goes straight to my hips and ass, which also means there's more to grab onto." He stated proudly, trying to stay optimistic.

"It's cool, I get it." Lucifer said dismissively. "Your soft pear-shaped figure keeps you from looking like a little boy. That way when the guys give you candy it won't seem like you're hooking up a pedophile." _Lucifer always knew Gabriel had more of a shapely body type compared to him. Not that he was jealous of his little brother, no, quite the opposite. Lucifer was protective of Gabriel and always will be. And yet at this moment..._

"Like that loser you keep on the back burner?" Gabriel mentioned. This struck a cord. "Oh yeah, you skinny bitch, I diddled him. I diddled him _real_ hard." Gabriel said childishly. "And he said I was the best fuck he had ever had. Way better than you." _This angered Lucifer. But not in the way Gabriel thought it would..._

"Oh yeah?" Lucifer jumped to his feet, deciding to fight fire with fire. "Well sorry honeybunch, but I fucked that little emo masochist freak you 'liked so much'." Lucifer mentioned, smirking. "Heads up buttercup, he was tiny and awful. His ass was fat and jiggly just like your fancy pudding and giant skin sacks." The sky then blackened and lightning struck. The arrogant smirks disappeared and weapons were drawn. _This was more than pastries and fuckbuddies. But none of them would admit anything._ "Keep your mouth off my things!"

"Likewise dick!" The sharp ends of two blades met with the blunt force of a single pistol. Grunts were heard as they pushed against one another, trying to win this battle of brute strength. That's when the elevator sounded and opened to reveal Michael, Sam, and Dean. At the sight of seeing his brothers fighting, Michael sighed. The sigh was heavy. He wasn't angry. Instead he sounded disappointed and worried.

"Great, they're fighting..." Michael murmured sadly.

"Shouldn't we do something?" Sam asked nervously. Michael sighed once again and shook his head.

"It will just all end badly." He warned them. Suddenly the sound of fluttering wings was heard and Castiel appeared, standing besides Michael and all-the-while scaring the living daylights out of the Winchesters. "Ah, Castiel. You have returned." Michael said casually, as if nothing happened. But then again, this was a normal thing for him, being an Angel and all.

"Michael." Castiel said, holding out his hand, which was enclosed around a scroll. "We received another Heavenly Mandate from Father." He informed.

"What does it say?" Michael asked, and watched as Castiel unraveled the scroll.

"Rope." Castiel read, showing the priest. "What does it mean?"

"Why does it fucking matter?" Gabriel sneered. With enough strength, Gabriel pushed Lucifer away and aimed his gun at the Archangel in case he got any ideas. "As long as I get away from you, I don't give two shits about what it means." He said to Lucifer. Slowly and carefully, Gabriel transformed his pistol back into his boxers and slipped them on underneath his tunic. "C'mon Sam, we have work to do." Gabriel said, walking over to Sam and snatching him up by the wrist. Leading him back to the elevator.

"Wait, where are we going?" Sam asked, confused and afraid.

"Didn't you hear Castiel?" Gabriel asked sharply. "We have a Ghost to gank, Samuel." He hissed, surprising Sam. Now was not the time to mess with Gabriel.

"Fine." Lucifer growled at Gabriel, shifting his scythes back into his stockings and carelessly throwing them to the ground. "I don't need you anyway. Go on and get yourself killed." Gabriel merely let out a scoff and childishly stuck out his tongue, further irking Lucifer's nerves. "Don't fuck with me whore!" Lucifer threatened, his eyes glowing red. Gabriel just glared at his brother and flipped Lucifer off.

"Don't fuck with _me_ whore." Gabriel repeated, slamming his fist on the down arrow button. Seconds later the doors closed and soon the duo were gone.

"You really don't mean that." Dean said matter-of-factly. "You care and you know it."

"Who are you to decide that?" Lucifer hissed, his eyes glowing brighter.

"You two are being overdramatic." Dean said, ignoring the question. "What are you fighting about anyway?"

"None of your business." Lucifer replied lowly, picking up his stockings and turning his back to retreat to his room. "If you need me, I'll be in my room changing. Gabriel is gonna need me, so I might as well be ready. Wheels up in twenty." With a wave over his shoulder, Lucifer disappeared.

"I thought they were fighting." Dean said to Michael, confused as to why Lucifer cared when he said he didn't.

"They are." Michael stated. "My brothers are complicated, but that's how family is."

* * *

"I still can't believe that fuckwit ate my pudding." Gabriel said through gritted teeth, gripping onto the steering wheel. "My fucking name was on it and everything! Is he fucking illiterate? Is he _that_ stupid that he just ignored what was mine and then eat the pudding behind my back?! The nerve! You think he would have some class. I just don't understand!" Gabriel ranted to himself.

"Wait." Sam paused and replayed the words that flew from Gabriel's mouth just moments ago. "That's what you were fighting about? Pudding?!" Sam asked, outraged that Lucifer and Gabriel were fighting over something so small and trivial.

"It's not just that." Gabriel argued. "You're supposed to trust your siblings, whether with dumb secrets or tasty food or just because." He explained. "They're not supposed to steal from you. They're not supposed to betray you. They're not supposed to put you down by calling you out on your weight." Gabriel babbling, feeling tears bubbling up in his eyes. Sam's angry expression softened. He hadn't thought of it like that. And so, without much hesitation, Sam reached out to comfort the Angel. But then Gabriel's phone rung, effectively stopping Sam in his tracks. Gabriel let out a small sigh as he picked up the phone. "What is it?"

_"Gabriel, Castiel just identified the Ghost you're looking for."_ Michael stated. _"But you must stay vigilante. This Ghost uses girls to-"_ Michael was unfortunately interrupted. Gabriel frowned and listened closely as someone else started talking.

_"Listen skank,"_ Lucifer spoke. _"I'll forgive you for your petty behavior-"_ Gabriel let out an animalistic growl and crushed the phone in his fist to silence his arrogant brother.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Sam asked quietly, hesitant and unsure, but he truly wanted to help. Gabriel snapped his head to face Sam, glaring at him.

"Do I look like I want to talk?" Gabriel asked in a snarky tone. Without waiting for a response, he turned his attention back to the road ahead. "It doesn't matter now anyway. This is our stop." Gabriel said, stopping the car and jumping out of Transparent. Sam followed his lead.

"Where do we start first?" Sam asked, baffled and curious. He had never done this before.

"You start questioning the pimps and prostitutes." Gabriel ordered, before walking away.

"And where are you going?"

"Sex shop." Gabriel answered bluntly, pointing to a store labeled Sweet Dreams. Sam sighed, his shoulders slouching in defeat. He was tired of all this. He was tired of being dragged around. He was tried of Gabriel's nasty ass attitude. He was tired of asking questions. And he was tired of this stupid fucking Pudding Problem.

"Now isn't the time for-"

"It isn't for me." Gabriel interrupted as he continued to stomp away. 'Brothers.' Sam thought, watching as the little Archangel walked away. Truthfully, he understood exactly what Gabriel was going through. While Gabriel made his way towards Sweet Dreams, he managed to bump into a child. She looked like Little Red Riding Hood.

"Help!" She cried out helplessly, gripping Gabriel's shirt. "Help, there was a mean big bad wolf trying to eat me!" Gabriel's eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 'A wolf? Here in the city?' He thought. 'This has to be what Michael was talking about.' Gabriel thought, sure of himself.

"Sweetie, I'm gonna need you to lead me to this dick-munch." Gabriel said, determined.

"He was over here." Little Red said, taking Gabriel's hand and leading him towards an alley. 'I don't need Lucifer or Sam, I can do this mission on my own.' Gabriel thought confidently as he ran deeper into the alleyway. Moments later, as they in the middle of searching for the culprit, a Ghost busted through a brick wall. "It's him!" Little Red screamed in fear, hiding behind Gabriel.

"Alright!" Taking off his boxers, Gabriel transformed them into his trusty pistol and aimed at the Big Bad Wolf. "Get ready, cum-dumpster! You're facing the one and only Gabriel. Embodiment of Gluttony and Messenger of God!" Without realizing it, Gabriel had been trapped; The Wolf and Little Red laughed. Wrapping Gabriel up in a thick black rope within seconds and tugging. Gabriel cried out as his weapon fell to the ground.

"It's one of those Angel freaks." The Wolf spoke. "Not only that, but an _Archangel_."

"What do they want with us?" Little Red asked, her sweet appearance now monstrous.

"Us?" Gabriel asked, baffled.

"Red and me are one of the same." The Wolf said, smirking. "We share one mind and one body. We're the same Ghost!" He explained.

"That's right." Little Red agreed. "I lure in the pervy men and Big Bad Wolf steals all of their money." She informed. "We're **huge** fans of money."

"Who falls for a shitty plan like that anymore?" Gabriel asked, rolling his eyes, clearly unimpressed. That's when his eyes caught the tail. A rope. "God-mother-damnit!" He yelled in frustration and realization. "'Rope' was being literal!" The Ghosts' smirks turned to cruel grins as they began to play tug-of-war with the poor Archangel. Gabriel gasped and screamed in pain, struggling against the rope that bound him. But then that pain slowly began to turn into pleasure and his struggling stopped completely. His eyes turned glassy and his screams of pain turned into airy moans. "Please, tu-tug harder!"

"He's enjoying it..." Little Red said, her snickers turning into laughter. "What a little freak!"

"At least he'll die in ecstasy!" The Wolf replied, unhinging his jaw to bite down on the Archangel.

"Hey yo!" Little Red and The Wolf looked to the entrance of the alley to see Lucifer, Dean, and Sam. "Drop the Archangel, now." Dean threatened, his gun ready. Lucifer tsked.

"Like that'll work." Lucifer murmured rather judgmentally, taking off his stockings and turning it into his beloved scythes. Without a second thought or regret, he threw one of his scythe at the beasts. The Ghosts quickly jumped back, letting the Archangel go. Gabriel yelped in surprise as he fell to the ground, the scythe clattering to the concrete besides him.

"I didn't need your help..." Gabriel groaned out quietly, getting to his feet and kicking the scythe back towards Lucifer.

"Yeah, I could see that. Sorry I interrupted your three-way gang bang." Lucifer apologized sarcastically and harshly. "That wasn't very smart of you. Going in on your own, I mean." He added, picking up Hellfire and wiping off the blade. His stance dominant and firm.

"Like you could do better?"

"Watch me, little brother." Lucifer said coolly, a confident crooked smirk on his face. Upon hearing a roar, Lucifer turned to see The Wolf running at him. Snickering, Lucifer lifted his scythes and prepared to cut the Ghost down to size. When two bullets suddenly hit his weapons and knocked him off balance, causing him to take a tumble into a brick wall. Examining his scythe, Lucifer gasped in disbelief and horror. "You shot at me!" Lucifer hands shook with anger at the sight of his scratched up blades.

"Whoops." Gabriel giggled, a smug smirk stretching across his lips. "Guess my finger slipped. Twice." He said, twirling his gun. Upon hearing a screech, Gabriel turned his attention to the little imp running at him. "I'll show _you_ how it's done." He said cockily, aiming at the little Ghost. Only for a scythe to come flying and pin Crotchless against the brick wall.

"Whoops." Lucifer snickered, dusting off his hands, satisfied. "Looks like my scythe slipped."

"Slipped, my ass!" Gabriel yelled in doubt, snatching his brother by the collar of his shirt. "I told you, don't fuck with me!"

"I think I remember telling you the same thing!" Lucifer yelled back, lifting Hellion and pointing the sharp blade at Gabriel's throat.

"Stop fighting!" Dean yelled, fending off the Ghosts as best as he could with Sam's help. Real weapons didn't exactly work on these type of Ghosts. "You're only making things worst!"

"Family shouldn't fight! Not like this! And you both know that your fighting is absolute madness..." Sam added, helping defend him brother. "You should be supporting each other! Helping each other! Not killing each other!" He protested, hoping they'd listen. But they weren't. So he decided to use another tactic. "Gabriel remember what you told me?" Sam asked, finally grabbing both Archangels' attention. "How siblings should trust each other? Whether with secrets or food or just because?"

"Shut up!" Lucifer and Gabriel screamed, punching the Winchesters in the face and causing them to fly across the alley. Sam and Dean crashed into a dumpster, but they were out of harms way nonetheless.

"Whores! Pay attention!" Little Red shrieked as the Big Bad Wolf clobbered the Angels to the ground. "So much for the puny little Angels saving the day!" The little Ghost teased.

"I believe we have beaten the most strongest team!"

"When we're finished with them, people are gonna be like: 'Archangels who?'"

"Those low down dirty whores were no match against our power." As the Ghosts continued to taunt and boast, the anger and fury inside the Archangels began to rise until it became deadly.

"Gabriel?" Lucifer whispered to his brother.

"Yeah Lucifer?" Gabriel replied, whispering.

"Are you thinking what I'm thinking?" Lucifer asked, his hand twitching as he slid his scythes closer to his side.

"Of course. We _are_ brothers." Gabriel answered, a smirk on his bruised face, reaching for his gun.

"So temporary truce?" Lucifer asked hopefully.

"Yeah, temporary truce." Gabriel agreed, flashing his brother a crooked smirk. The Archangels then wobbled to their feet, weapons in hand and a dangerous gleam in their eyes. Unleashing their wings, Gabriel and Lucifer gave each other a knowing glance while the Ghosts continued to be oblivious.

"Let's kill 'em!" The Archangels declared, suddenly alerting the Ghosts. Lucifer grinned wickedly, slashing his scythes at the beasts. Streaks of violent energy slicing the thick rope that tied Little Red and The Big Bad Wolf together.

"You're mine." Lucifer declared, pointing his blade at The Wolf. "Beg for mercy." Snickering, Lucifer flew at the Ghost with grace and alarming sped, jabbing The Wolf in the stomach with the blunt end of his weapon. The Wolf cried out in pain, flying back into the brick walls.

"Hope you haven't forgotten about me." Gabriel said to Little Red, firing his gun at the little imp, watching her dance pitifully in order to avoid the bullets.

"I don't know if you two know this, but just in case you didn't, never underestimate my brothers." Sam and Dean looked up to see Michael standing over them, lending his hands to help them off the dirty alleyway ground. The Winchesters gladly accepted the good deed, the two standing to their feet and observing the fight alongside Michael. "There is Gabriel's strength and Lucifer's technique." Michael stated. The Winchesters watched as each attack delivered from the Angels hit the Ghosts dead on. "These are the properties that keep the Archangels together. They are Lucifer and Gabriel!" Michael announced proudly, watching as the Ghosts exploded. The Archangels then collected the Heaven Coins and made their way to Transparent and Baby.

"You guys going home now?" Sam asked, and Gabriel nodded with a small hum. "No more fighting, right?" Sam asked hopefully, and Gabriel nodded happily while Lucifer ruffled his hair.

"We made a truce." Gabriel stated. "You coming along, Sammy, Dean-o?" He asked. tilting his head.

"No thanks." The Winchesters said, declining politely and gesturing to their own car—to which Dean fondly named Baby. As Lucifer pulled Transparent out of park, Dean nodded to the Archangel. Lucifer nodded back in understanding before driving off.

"So, listen," Lucifer opened the glove compartment and pulled out a jar of Panna Cotta pudding. Gabriel gasped in surprise, surely not expecting this. "I brought this for you, so, here." Lucifer said rather awkwardly, quickly handing Gabriel the dessert.

"No way..." Gabriel said in disbelief. "I don't understand. How did you get this?"

"That's for me to know, little bro. That's for me to know." Lucifer said secretively. "But I'm sure you'll figure it out." Gabriel hummed, inspecting the pudding closer. Yes, the pudding was contained in its usual winged ball-regular mouth half-pint jelly jar, but Gabriel could tell it was different from the original pudding he ordered. Instead of blackberries and strawberries there were blueberries and cherries, the chocolate topping was replaced with raspberry syrup, and it was vanilla bean. It was homemade. Gabriel smiled and let out a bubbly giggle, earning a knowing laugh from Lucifer.

"You dick."

"You pussy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When you're supposed to be getting that good night's rest, but insomnia is all like "You woke? Don't answer that, I know you are, you're welcome."
> 
> I got so many ideas swimming in my heads. Mostly inspired by PASWG, Supernatural, Tumblr, and YouTube.
> 
> Insomnia, herbal tea, and coffee don't work hand-in-hand as a team in my own opinion bee-tee-dubs.


	5. The Lingerie Run From Hell

Saturday night. The ideal night to go out clubbing or drinking. Hell, even having a backyard bonfire! The ideal Saturday night for Michael was having some peace and quiet, whether it be alone or with his family. The ideal Saturday night for Lucifer was going out dancing, mingling with other people, having fun. The ideal Saturday night for Castiel was going out Night Flying—as he says—which he usually does by himself or with his loved ones. And the ideal Saturday night for Gabriel was having a fun Angels Day In—as he likes to call it—where he spends the entire day with his family. However, unfortunately for the Angels, there would be none of that this Saturday night. The hum of a blade sharpener and the click of guns surrounded the living room area. And this irritated Gabriel to no end until he finally couldn't take it anymore. Gabriel growled, tossing his broken gun down at his feet and gripped his hair in frustration.

"I'm so fucking bored!" Gabriel cried out, groaning. "Why the fuck do we have to do this shit?" He whined, throwing his arms into the air in defeat and exhaustion. "Seriously, how backwards is this." He continued, gesturing to their surroundings: Lucifer sat on his left, piles upon piles of varies styled stockings laid next to the couch and a blade sharpener sat between his feet. Lucifer was wearing a blowtorch helmet, shielding his face from the sparks the blade sharpener produced. Gabriel besides his brother on the right, piles upon piles of varies styled boxers laying next to the couch. Broken guns sat on top of the coffee table, gears scattered underneath the piece of furniture. "I mean, we're sitting at home on a weekend alone, jacking off to goddamn machinery." He said, lazily reaching over into his pile of boxers to inspect another pistol.

"I can't tell you how much I love it when you get dramatic, baby brother." Lucifer said in a bland sarcastic tone, flipping up the visor to stare at Gabriel with a blank face. He wouldn't admit it, but he was just as bored. "It's like you really don't already know the answer to that question. Gee, Gabe, I don't know. You think we'll get the wrath of the red-faced drama queen if these weapons aren't prepped?" He asked mockingly.

"Oh!" Gabriel sung both loudly and mockingly, rolling his eyes. "My name is Lucifer and I rather jack off machinery than go out and have fun like a real adult." Gabriel taunted, playing with his pistol until it broke. "C'mon!" He groaned, carelessly throwing the busted pistol aside. "This goes against everything that we were created to do. Let's ditch that bastard." He declared.

"It's not that easy." Castiel said, grabbing their attention as he stepped through the door.

"Oh really?" Gabriel asked, raising an eyebrow. Castiel shook his head in response. "Hey, why aren't you prepping your weapons?"

"I already prepped them earlier this morning." Castiel stated. "Now, as I was saying, it's not like you can take over Michael's job." Castiel said, getting back on track. "Michael has a purpose and that purpose is taking care of us." He stated, but Gabriel just ignored everything he said. Typical.

"Check it hookers!" Gabriel cheered, putting his phone on display. The two Angels hummed in interest and looked over to see the text Gabriel received: Lingerie Run.

"'Lingerie Run'?" Lucifer and Castiel read aloud, staring at the digital invitation.

"Yup, that's right, my lovely brothers. And, get this, the sendoff is being held at the university!" Gabriel said, vibrating with excitement. Lucifer shrugged halfheartedly and tossed his broken scythe to the side dismissively. He was bored and he sure as hell wasn't missing an event like this.

"Yeah, sure, I'm in."

Later that night  
University of Sioux Falls

"You're going to stop doing this." Castiel said exhaustedly, rolling his eyes and falling back in his seat almost defeated. Once again, Lucifer and Gabriel had made yet another grand entrance. Hell, Gabriel even snapped up a fancy red carpet for their arrival.

"Just shut up and shed the suit already." Lucifer said, tearing his clothes with such ease. Gabriel followed suit with such eagerness. Castiel sighed, but hesitantly done as told. Exiting the car, the Angels presented themselves to the student body: Lucifer wore red boxers, red and black striped stockings, and tattered black tennis shoes. Gabriel wore black boxers and an old pair of true blue sneakers. And Castiel wore navy boxers, navy and midnight black striped legwarmers, and beat-up navy Chucks. Their numbers being 92, 69, and 7. "I know you ain't tryna start this party without us!" Gabriel shouted as he and Lucifer swiftly slipped on their shades. The crowd cheered for their Kings, watching as they strutted down the red carpet like the stars they were.

"Oh! Hey guys." Sam greeted, meeting the Angels at the end of their magic carpet with his brother by his side. "What's going on?" He asked curiously, his eyes gliding over the campus' front lawn, where half naked students were partying without a single fuck in the world. He nor Dean had any idea what was going on and were only here on his friends' behalf. Jess had texted earlier that afternoon, telling him that he and Dean had to come to the campus' front lawn later that night for an odd yet meaningful protest. They sure as hell wasn't expecting this.

"We're participating in the Lingerie Run." Castiel stated casually. The Winchesters shared an expression that was combined with bafflement, surprise, and nervousness. But then they turned back to the three Angels and gave them charming yet wary smiles.

"Well, you all look good as usual." Dean said coolly. Lucifer and Gabriel coo'd at the compliment while Castiel smiled shyly.

"But wait." Gabriel then said, frowning. "Why are you two still fully dressed?" He asked, unimpressed, his shades sliding down the slope of his nose to inspect the Winchesters closely.

"Perhaps they're not comfortable with undressing in front of unwanted people." Castiel insisted.

"Fuck that." Gabriel said dismissively. "I know you're hiding something from me, Sammy. And I'm determined to know what." He said, taking quick strides towards the tall Winchester. "Why don't we take these layers off, yeah? I wanna see, Sammy, c'mon!" Gabriel laughed, tugging at Sam's jeans like an excited puppy. While Gabriel continued to torture Sam, Lucifer turned to Dean and raised a single eyebrow. Dean rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest.

"Well?" Lucifer inquired. "Better get stripping." He said, earning a small laugh from Dean.

"If you want me to undress, you gotta ask nicely."

"I don't usually ask 'nicely' when it comes to getting the things I want." Lucifer replied.

"Ya'know, I can be stubborn too." Dean said, challenging the Archangel.

"Don't I know it." Lucifer chuckled. "Don't forget, Winchester, I can simply snap my fingers to get those pesky layers off." He said, reminding Dean that he _was_ an Archangel. Lucifer could have whatever he wanted, when he wanted, and he never had to ask—not usually. Sparing Dean another questioning gaze, Lucifer pointed to the ground. The gesture demanding and his last warning. Dean scoffed and turned his head to avoid the Archangel's gaze, but still, he began to take off his clothes. Lucifer smirked in victory.

"Don't think you've won." Dean mumbled as he continued to undress. "I'm only doing this because I rather not have my clothes torn off my body with a single snap." He explained lamely, discarding the last of his clothes until the only thing Dean was wearing were pretty pink lacy panties. Lucifer purred happily, hearts in his lustful eyes. Dean blushed heavily and shoved on his run-down gray Chucks.

"You got some sort of panty kink, Winchester?" Lucifer asked teasingly, causing Dean's blush to worsen. "You do, don't you?"

"And if I do?" Dean replied quietly. "Besides, they feel nice, so fuck off." He said defensively.

"Ain't nobody judging you, Dean." Lucifer said, chuckling. "I couldn't even if I wanted to. Besides, everyone has a kink."

"Finally!" Castiel, Dean, and Lucifer all turned to face Gabriel. Watching as the Archangel waved Sam's discarded clothes in the air with a cocky smile. "I finally got Sammy's clothes off!" Gabriel cheered.

"Hooray, props to you." Sam said sarcastically. "You animal, you practically ripped my clothes off." He whined, a rosy blush spread across his cheeks. Sam tried to ignore everyone's stares as they focused on his ashen gray boxers and matching thigh-highs.

"Nice to know you have a lingerie fetish too." Gabriel said playfully. Sam rolled his eyes in response, crossing his arms in what seemed like a pout. "Don't give me that face, Sammy."

"I have no idea what you're talking about." Sam mumbled stubbornly, toeing on his worn out white sneakers. Suddenly the football field lights turned on, nearly blinding everyone while they turned to aim at a figure standing on top of the bleachers with a microphone in hand. "Looks like the event is starting."

"Good evening students!" Standing at the top of the bleachers was a man. He wore a black diamond mask, a leather black spiked collar, metal cuffs, leather black pants, and black army lace-up combat boots. "You all must be wondering who I am." The man said, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "I'm called Shameless, but you all may call me Master." He purred, running a hand through his gelled hair. "Welcome, my fellow sinners, to the Lingerie Run!" Shameless cheered, and the crowd cheered with him.

"Does he...sound familiar?" Dean asked curiously. He, Gabriel, and Castiel tilted their heads while they analyzed the mysterious man. "He looks familiar too." He added, taking note of the Shameless' black hair and cool blue eyes. Sam hummed in interest and nodded in agreement.

"This started out as a student protest, but it's time people got less political." Shameless explained, eyes glancing over the student body. "Now then, who's ready to fuck this city up?!" The students hooted and hollered, running to the starting line. "Ready?" Dean, Castiel, Sam, Gabriel, and Lucifer all glanced at each other. Sparing one another a single nod before focusing in front of them. "Go!" At the sound of a starting pistol, they were off. And to say the least, it was exciting. Running around town in their underwear and scaring the shit out of citizens.

"Whoever this Shameless guy is, remind me to bang him later." Dean said, gazing upon the hundreds of students running with them.

"This is gonna be a beautiful friendship, Dean-o." Gabriel said, flashing Dean a wink.

"You guys are awful." Sam said, rolling his eyes. Still though, he couldn't help but let a playful smile spread across his face.

"I," The group then looked to Castiel. His cheeks were a light pink and his eyes almost glossy. Lucifer and Gabriel could practically see his wings fluttering. "I have this weird feeling in my chest." Castiel said, grasping at the area over his heart. "Am I sick?" He asked, concerned. Lucifer and Gabriel merely chuckled. "This isn't funny, it's a serious question!"

"We know." Lucifer and Gabriel replied.

"I think you finally understand what it feels like to be human." Gabriel said, chuckling once more. Castiel blinked, glancing down at his chest. "Aren't you glad with snuck out now?" He asked teasingly, and Castiel nodded with a small smile.

"Shit!" Sam suddenly yelled, halting to a stop. "Guys, we have a problem!" He pointed ahead. Everyone stopped soon after, following Sam's finger to see there was a Ghost standing in their path.

"Come the fuck on!" Lucifer and Gabriel whined, kicking off their shoes in frustration.

"And...the feeling is gone." Castiel sighed, taking off his shoes and carelessly tossing them aside.

"Oh my! Where did you get those?" The Ghost asked, gazing at the lingerie with such adoration. "You really should hand those over to me." He said, sticking out his hand, demanding they give him what he wanted.

"Yeah right." Lucifer then bent over, taking off his stockings and transforming them into Hellfire and Hellion. Castiel and Gabriel followed suit, transforming their garments into their beloved weapons. "Die." Lucifer growled, getting into a defensive stance. His scythes raised, ready to cause damage. But then, seconds later, the scythes started to glow a bright blue and shifted back into a stockings. "Oh fuck." Lucifer swore. "Something is wrong with Hellfire and Hellion." Lucifer murmured, lowering his weapons and staring at them with disbelief.

"Same with Crotchless." Gabriel replied. Gabriel kept pulling the trigger, but all the gun did was click. Jammed.

"Bet you wished we stayed home now." Castiel said, running at his enemy head on and slashing at the Ghost with a battle cry.

"Goodbye cruel world!" The Ghost cried out dramatically. The team waited for the Ghost to explode, but it didn't. "Ok, you can't keep dicking me around with this fake death scene. Better luck next time, honeybunch." The Ghost taunted before running away. Castiel hesitantly turned his gaze to his weapons and screamed in unexpected horror.

"No! Diaphanous, Irenic!" Castiel cried out, his eyes trailing over his chipped twin katana. "What happened to my weapons?!" Castiel yelled in frustration and disbelief, watching as the broken twin katana turned back into his legwarmers.

"Legwarmers make you look cheap anyway." The Ghost said from behind Castiel. Before Castiel could react, the Ghost ran around the Angel. And suddenly the legwarmers were gone.

"Lucifer, Gabriel, watch out!" Castiel warned his brothers, but the Ghost managed to snatch up the lingerie anyway. Running circles around the Archangels. And then the damn Ghost ate the Heavenly Garments. "Dean, Sam, run!" Castiel yelled to the bewildered brothers. He then whistled loudly and soon came Transparent. "Get in now!" He commanded, throwing Dean the keys. Without a single word, the brothers hopped in and drove off before they were attacked. Ghost simply smirked and ran off the Winchesters.

"Damnit!" Gabriel swore. "And on our night off too. What the fuck, man?!"

"That's not important right now." The Angels quickly spun around to see Shameless. "That Ghost, he has a lingerie fetish." Shameless stated, handing Gabriel a satin green button-down. Gabriel accepted the shirt, grateful. "Once he obtains the desires lingerie, he eats them. Luckily he doesn't seem to gain power from doing so."

"But our lingerie are our weapons." Lucifer said, frowning. "How do we get them back?"

"You don't." Shameless answered. "They're broken anyway. So use an alternative weapon." He explained, tossing them some car keys. Definitely not to Transparent, but Lucifer seemed rather familiar with the set of keys. "To the Impala." Shameless informed, before turning his back and walking away.

"Ok," Gabriel started. "I really am starting to think that guy seems familiar."

* * *

"What do we do now?" Dean asked, tapping his foot impatiently. "They should've already took care of the Ghost, right?" He asked, worried for the Angels. Sam bit his lip. He wanted to be positive, but he was worried too. "Well, say something!"

"I'm sure they're fine." Sam assured his brother. Never in his life has Sam seen Dean in such a panic. Not like this.

"Cas wouldn't give us their car if it wasn't serious!" Dean yelled, pointing to Transparent for emphasis. "The car, Sammy!" As of now though, in Sam's opinion, he was being dramatic.

"Dean, calm down. They're fine."

"Get back here!" Jumping at attention, Dean and Sam looked over their shoulders to see the same perverted Ghost speeding their way, with the Angels not too far behind thankfully. The Ghost suddenly appeared behind the boys and pushed Sam to the ground before taking hold of Dean. The Ghost roughly gripped Dean by his cropped hair, tilting his head up to reveal more of his neck.

"Gotcha!" The Ghost cheered, breathing into the crook of Dean's neck and tugged his hair harder. Dean gasped in pain and clenched his eyes shut as he tried to claw the Ghost off him. "Hush now, pet." The Ghost whispered, trailing his fingers over Dean's stomach. "Now, let's take these off!" He coo'd, slowly slipping Dean's panties down.

"Don't forget about me!" Sam swiped at the Ghost's legs, causing him to trip and accidentally throw Dean over his shoulder. "Dean!" Sam scrambled to his feet and jumped out of the Ghost's reach, running after his flying brother.

"Sam!" Lucifer called out. He was just a few feet away from Sam. "Give me your socks!" He ordered, sticking out his hand.

"But I don't think thigh-highs are the same as stockings!" Sam yelled back, shaking his head slightly. "It won't work!"

"Just do it!" Sam heaved a sigh, but he managed to get his thigh-highs off anyway, tripping numerous of times in the process.

"Here!" Sam outstretched his arm. As his feet connected with the hood of the Impala, Lucifer grabbed onto the undergarments. "Now, lets do this!" Twirling the lingerie with concentration and skill, the two were then awestruck as the undergarments began to transform. Licking his lips, Lucifer tossed the glowing garments in the air and Sam watched as the thigh-highs became one. As the light dimmed, a weapon fell into Lucifer's outstretched hands. "It actually worked." Lucifer murmured, gazing down upon the kusarigama.

"And if it didn't?" Sam asked, but Lucifer didn't answer. He obviously hadn't thought about that. "Screw it, just go gank the Ghost." He said, sighing heavily, shooing the Archangel off into battle.

"You ain't gotta tell me twice." Lucifer said smugly, his wings appearing. And he was off. "Oh pitiful shadow lost in the darkness, drifting between Heaven and Earth and shit." Lucifer said, smirking at the runaway Ghost. "Don't you run away from me!" Lucifer threw the chain at the Ghost. The chain easily wrapping around the Ghost tightly, keeping his still. "Repent motherfucker!" He cried out, and finished off the Ghost with a powerful slash. The Ghost exploded upon impact while the church bell rung in the distance. Lucifer was blown back, but was luckily caught by Sam. "Thanks." He said gratefully, and Sam nodded, helping the Archangel stand. Suddenly that's when he remembered what he was doing: trying to save Dean.

"Dean!" He called out, looking all around for his brother. "Where's my brother?" Sam asked, looking around frantically for Dean. "Where is he? He should've landed by now."

"Sammy, look." Gabriel said, pointing up. "Incoming!" Lucifer's eyes widened. Dropping the chain-sickle, he reacted quickly, shooting up into the air. Holding out his arms, Lucifer let Dean fall into his arms, where he was safe and alive. A little jolted, but safe.

"You ok?" Lucifer asked, worried for the Winchester. Dean nodded timidly as the two slowly descended.

"Just tryin' to catch my breath." Dean replied, leaning his head on Lucifer's shoulder while a heavy blush spread across his sweaty face. "Thanks for...ya'know." He said shyly and rather out of character. But they didn't seem to mind.

"It was no problem." Lucifer said with a toothy smile. As soon as his feet touched the hood of Baby, Dean jumped out of Lucifer's arms. And so the mission was officially over.

"As a complete stranger, I would like to congratulate you on a job well done." Shameless said, coming out of nowhere. "Now, why don't you get on home?" He suggested.

"I guess." Gabriel said, shrugging indifferently and halfheartedly. "I don't know about you guys, but I'm kinda bored." Gabriel said, stifling a yawn.

"I agree with Gabriel." Castiel spoke from his seat behind the wheel of Baby. Hopping down from the Impala's hood, Lucifer handed Sam back his thigh-highs.

"Thanks for the help." Lucifer said, flashing Sam a wink.

"You're welcome, I guess." Sam said, quirking an amused brow.

"So, uh, what now?" Dean asked curiously.

"You should all try to avoid the angry mob." Shameless said, pointing to the rioting group of college students. "Just get in the car and drive away quickly, I'll handle it." He instructed, before walking towards the large crowd to calm them down.

"What a mad man." Lucifer said, jumping into the passenger seat of the Impala.

"I was thinking sadomasochist." Castiel admitted casually.

"Ya'know, we don't necessarily have to go home. I mean, we could, but the night _is_ still young." Dean said, hopping into Transparent, gladly taking the wheel.

"Yeah, let's fuck this city up!" Gabriel cheered, bouncing into the backseat of Transparent, dragging Sam along with him.

"Or we could have another movie night." Castiel suggested, twiddling his thumbs shyly. "We've never watched a movie as a team before."

"I guess we are a team huh?" Dean inquired, staring at his new teammates.

"So who's picking the movie?" Lucifer asked, as Castiel pulled out of campus.

"Me!" Dean cheered, putting the key in ignition. "We should totally watch a Swayze movie!"

"Or two!" Sam added happily.

"Hell yeah!"

Later that night  
The Angels' Residence

"You've really never seen Roadhouse?" Dean asked, blinking in surprise. The Angels arch a questioning brow in sync.

"How about Dirty Dancing?" Sam asked, adding on. The Angels simply tilted their heads simultaneously.

"Have any of you seen any Swayze movie? At all?" Dean questioned, raising an eyebrow. The Angels shook their heads in perfect unison. "God, you guys are scary sometimes."

"Who is 'Swayze'?" Castiel asked, using visible air quotations.

"And you say you know and see all." Dean said teasingly, playfully rolling his eyes.

"Porn? Yes. Romantic comedy? Not so much." Gabriel replied, nudging his head in _so-so_ gesture. "Plus the 'knowing and seeing all' thing is really Dad's job."

"Fine then. We're gonna start with one of our favorites then." Dean declared, and proceeded to put in Dirty Dancing. "How ironic you have all these movies, but never watched them." He said, gesturing to the two DVD shelves standing high and tall side-by-side next to the TV.

"There's a lot of movies we have that we haven't watched." Lucifer stated, shrugging halfheartedly with a sheepish smile to match.

"Only because my dear brothers insisted on experiencing the human way of life." Castiel explained. "Translation, wasting money."

"So, what, is this like porn?" Gabriel asked curiously, observing the DVD case.

"Just because the movie called 'Dirty Dancing' doesn't mean anything." Sam informed. "You don't always have to take things so literal." He said with a hint of amusement in his voice, taking a seat next to the short Archangel. Which was a big mistake on his behalf, but also a blessing. To some extent.

"I take almost everything literal." Gabriel said, winking at the younger Winchester.

"Fuck you." Sam scoffed, rolling his eyes.

"When, where, and how hard?" Gabriel asked, making Sam blush. "You practically ran into that one, Sammy." He said, blowing against the shell of Sam's ear and causing him to jump.

"Shh, everyone shut the fuck up!" Dean and Lucifer hissed in perfect sync, watching as the movie started. That whole night was filled with movie after movie—courtesy of the Winchesters—and playful banter. Thanks to Gabriel there were piles upon piles of delicious desserts and snacks, along with video games to play when films weren't just quite enough. In the end of it all, before everyone fell asleep, Dean came up with a name for their new team. "Team Free Will." He said. "We got the low-key kinky white boys and the sexy but trashy Angels." And so this was their team: Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Sam, Dean, and Castiel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now that I think about it, I imagine Shameless' diamond mask to look similar to Damian Wayne wears... Just an odd thought that came to me while writing this chapter.


	6. Anarchy and Malum: Kings vs Queens

Soft snores were heard that morning as the five young men slept peacefully. Each laying on top of each other, snuggling close to one another like a litter of kittens. As the sun rose high in the sky, the glare fluttered through the window. The light tickling their skin and slowly arousing the boys from their dreams. One by the one, they opened their eyes. Dean let out a quiet groan as he sat up, stretching his arms over his head.

"Mornin'." Dean mumbled, laying back down to lean against the armrest of the couch.

"Morning." Gabriel greeted back quietly, draping himself at Dean's side.

"Good morning." Castiel said softly, turning over to snuggle closer to Gabriel. Sam and Lucifer just scoffed at the greetings, rubbing the sleep from their tired eyes and leaning against one another.

"And a good morning to you too, assholes." Gabriel joked. Sam and Lucifer grumbled in response. The elevator then sounded and opened to reveal Michael. He looked surprised upon seeing the group of five, buried in a mountain of covers and junk on the couch. He also looked nervous and awkward. Not to mention the strange outfit he was wearing—which was a long leather black trenchcoat—made him look even more suspicious.

"Good morning." Michael greeted, gulping nervously. "Angels." He nodded to his brothers. "Sam, Dean." Nodding once again towards the Winchesters, Michael exited the elevator. That's when everyone finally noticed he was holding a single envelop in his hands. But he just stood there in front of the elevator, still nervous and awkward.

"Hey Mikey." Lucifer greeted back, now fully awake. "What's with the getup?" He asked curiously, staring at the coat questionably.

"It's nothing." Michael answered with a careless shrug and shake of his head. "Also, I have some mail for you." He said, changing the subject. Gabriel tilted his head, waving his hand and bringing the mail into his awaiting hand.

"Thanks Mikey." Gabriel said gratefully. Michael nodded and turned around, rapidly pressing the down arrow button until the elevator showed up. Quickly stepping inside, Michael continued to rapidly press the button until the doors closed. And then he was gone.

"Well that was highly unusual." Castiel said, with Sam and Dean nodding in agreement.

"Now I'm even more curious." Gabriel said as he began to hastily rip open envelop. "We don't get much mail, so this should be interesting." He said, setting the ripped up envelop on the table. Holding up a neatly folded letter for everyone to see. "Oh."

"What?" Lucifer inquired. "What does it say?"

"The letter is from Donatello."

"What does it say?" Castiel asked, just as curious.

"I can't tell if it's good news or bad news-"

"What does it say?!" Dean, Castiel, Sam, and Lucifer yelled simultaneously. This caused Gabriel to jump in surprise. They were all curious, eager, and impatient.

"Alright!" Gabriel yelled back. With a loud frustrated huff, Gabriel began to read the letter aloud. "Dear Lucifer, Gabriel, and Castiel Anarchy-" He paused. "'Anarchy'? But we don't have last names." He stated, confused. "Is that what people are calling us?"

"Maybe. Could be Michael's idea." Lucifer said, shrugging. "Keep reading." He urged, and Gabriel turned his attention back to the letter.

"It is with great pleasure that I am able to inform you that the mayor of Sioux Falls herself has bought the University of Sioux Falls. She has notified me soon after her purchase, stating that she wishes to make a few changes. Starting with the staff. I..." Gabriel paused once more. Taking a breath, he then continued. "I have been given an extended vacation and won't be returning to work. I have retired, as some may say. It is for the best. You will also be greeted with two new students. They are known as the Malum Sisters. Treat them kindly. Even if they do not return the favor. Your former principal, Donatello." Gabriel sighed, crumbling up the letter and tossing it. "Retired? Retired?! They fired him. And for what? Because it was 'for the best'?" Gabriel ranted angrily. "I officially fucking hate these new Malum Sisters." He declared, crossing his arms. Suddenly a large package appeared in Dean's lap, causing him to sputter in surprise. Must've been Michael. Taking the box, Lucifer inspected it and soon found a card. Snatching the card up, Gabriel began to read aloud. "'For Lucifer, Gabriel, and Castiel, here are your new uniforms.' Signed Donatello." Gabriel growled, his eyebrow twitching in distaste and hatred. "Fucking bitches!"  
  
The next morning  
University of Sioux Falls

Out of pure spite for the mysterious Malum Family, Lucifer and Gabriel decided to burn the uniforms and stick to their own clothes. Sam, Dean, and Castiel followed suit. Upon seeing the group out of uniform, whispers began to fill the campus.

"The hive is buzzing." Dean whispered to Sam.

"They look afraid." Sam whispered back, and Dean nodded in agreement.

"Do you think this is because of the Malum Sisters?" Castiel asked quietly to the Winchesters.

"It has to be."

"Excuse me." Suddenly a newcomer joined the group, walking alongside them. A student. He was dressed in the new school uniform and he looked just as frightened as the other students. "I'm sorry, but I have to ask. Why aren't you wearing your new uniform?" He asked, scared and interested. Hell, he almost sounded impressed and in awe.

"Our uniform?" Gabriel inquired with a scoff. "We burned them." He stated proudly.

"That was a bad choice." He said, shaking his head. "It's apart of the university's new policy. No student is to be out of uniform. You must go home and change."

"Into what?" Lucifer asked, arching an eyebrow. "My brother told you we already burned the trashy rags." He said, motioning to the tasteless khaki the nervous student was wearing. "Besides I rather like my clothes." Lucifer said jokingly. "And what's the big deal?"

"What's the big deal?" The student repeated. "The Queens demand it." He informed. This caused the entire group to stop moving. "D-did I say something wrong?"

"Yeah." Lucifer answered. "I believe you did." Quickly, before anyone could react, Lucifer took a fistful of the boy's collar. The Archangel then lifted the poor student in the air. Not too high, but high enough that the his shoes barely brushed the ground. The boy shook violently, fearing for his life. Nobody has ever seen this side of Lucifer. Not anyone on campus anyway. "I don't mean to lose my cool, but I could've swore you said 'Queens'. Now is that right?" Lucifer asked, and the student nodded his head feverishly. There was no point in lying. "Last time I checked we were Kings." Lucifer said, his tone cold and demanding.

"I-I-I mea-meant th-the Malum Sisters!" The boy stuttered. "I meant no disrespect!" He said apologetically, bowing his head, begging for forgiveness. "Please, ha-have mercy." He pleaded helplessly. Lucifer huffed unhappily, but released the frightened boy from his grip anyway. The boy fell on his rear, but managed to turn himself around so he was kneeling at Lucifer's feet like a puppy.

"Listen and listen good, alright pup?" Lucifer spoke, and the boy nodded. "Tell your pathetic friends that this school belongs to the Kings. You got that?" He ordered, and the boy nodded feverishly in understanding. "Now scram."

"Th-thank you, my King." He said, kissing Lucifer's shoe before he scrambled away.

"Fucking bitches." Lucifer spat, clenching his fists. "Taking our rightful place at the top of the food chain." He growled, glaring at nothing in particular. Suddenly the familiar sound of a grand entrance was heard, which caused the roaming students to pathetically stumble and topple over each other as a black SUV limo parked at the gateway of the college.

"Everybody freak out!"

"It's Ruby!"

"And don't forget Lilith!" The thousands of students soon managed to get themselves in line—a line for females and a line for males—before the doors open to reveal the Malum Sisters.

"Hail to Miss Ruby Malum and Miss Lilith Malum!" The students greeted in unison, standing as still as statues as Ruby and Lilith Malum strutted down their sparkling red carpet. Ruby had long chocolate brown hair that reached her bust and curled at the ends, glowing olive skin, and sharp chocolate brown eyes. Lilith had long flowing blonde hair styled in loose curls, beautiful fair skin, and blue-gray eyes. The uniforms they sported were khaki; they both wore long sleeve suitcoats with white button-downs underneath and blood red ties, tight short skirts, and black pumps. Except Lilith wore white kneesocks. The two new girls continued to walk down the red carpet until they reached the end where Team Free Will stood.

"Look sister, there seems to be five students out of uniform." Lilith pointed out, her eyes gliding over the boys in distaste.

"Indeed. They must have not read the letter." Ruby said, glancing at her younger sister. "Perhaps they are illiterate."

"Or just plain ignorant."

"You bitches obviously don't know who we are." Lucifer hissed, crossing his arms.

"Should we?" Ruby asked, challenging the Archangel.

"No duh." Gabriel said, jumping in. "We're Lucifer, Gabriel, and Castiel Anarchy." He said, using their newfound last name.

"Ah yes, the Anarchy Brothers." Lilith said, sounding unimpressed and bored. She then turned her focus to Castiel, Sam, and Dean. "Are these pets of yours?" She asked, clearly amused, referring to Castiel and the Winchesters. Castiel snarled in anger, his eyes narrowing in a protective nature. He was so mad to the point he nearly jumped at the uptight whore.

"We actually have names ya'know." Dean spoke up, keeping his tone calm. "My name is Dean Winchester. And this is my younger brother, Sam Winchester." He said, introducing himself and his brother. "Clearly you must be deaf because Gabriel already introduced our Angel friend here. But I'll gladly humor you, dollface. See now, this is Castiel Anarchy." Dean said, making Castiel feel better and acknowledged. "We're all friends here. No one owns anyone, meaning we're our own person." He said, his tone now playful and almost sarcastic. Lilith hissed.

"How dare you speak to me in such a manner, you disgusting creature?" Lilith growled, her brow twitching in irritation.

"How am I speaking to you?" Dean asked with a chuckle, smirking at the fuming girl.

"Why you little-"

"Ah, ah, ah!" Dean tsked, taunting her. "A young lady such as yourself shouldn't get angry, it's improper manners." Dean said teasingly, in a playfully scolding tone. "Didn't your mother teach you any better?" He asked mockingly.

"My dear sister, I believe the hooligan is correct." Ruby said, placing a hand on Lilith's shoulder. Although it wasn't really out of comfort. "Your face is turning awfully red." She stated, sounding rather fond. Lilith paused, blinking, before cupping her cheeks timidly.

"My apologies, I blush easily." Lilith said, reminding Ruby, smiling shyly to herself.

"Even so, you mustn't stoop so low to their level." Ruby said, walking around the group. And Lilith followed close behind her. "We shall meet again. Until then. We bid you adieu."

* * *

"What the fuck is this shit?" Lucifer groaned loudly, speaking with his mouth full of...something. "This is fucking trash! It looked like meatloaf, but it sure didn't taste like it!" Lucifer quickly spat out the tasteless meal on the tray in front of him, wiping his lips with his jacket sleeve. "Seriously, what the fuck?"

"Donatello _did_ say the mayor would be making some changes." Castiel said sadly, pushing away his tray with disinterest and distaste.

"I didn't think they'd be poisoning us!" Gabriel cried out, whining, digging in his pack for something to spice up his meal. "We need ketchup, mustard, hot sauce, or even jizz to jazz this shit up!" He claimed, flipping open his bag and emptying it out. Still, nothing.

"What kind of hippie shit is this?" Dean complained, throwing his tray over his shoulder. He didn't even care anymore. First Donatello gets fired, next they receive these ugly as uniforms, then the rules miraculously changes, and now the food is replaced with this healthy ass sludge. So much for relying on the campus mess hall for food. "Lunch used to be my favorite time of day." Dean whined miserably. Suddenly a sparkly red carpet was rolled out, causing the group to groan unhappily.

"Great, hooray." Sam cheered sarcastically, hitting his head flat on the table. "They're back." He mumbled. Out of the corner of their eyes, Team Free Will watched as Ruby and Lilith strutted to the reserved table next to them. The table was even set: a cream white tablecloth was spread out with a vase of roses sitting on top, shining plates sat on either side, and numerous of utensils laid alongside at the girls' disposal. A second later, a waiter showed up at their side. He had short black hair styled in tight natural curls, dark skin, and dark brown eyes paired with rectangular glasses. He wore an obsidian black suitcoat and matching dress pants, an iron gray dress shirt underneath paired with a plum tie, and a pair of jade black loafers.

"Here you are, Mistress Ruby, Mistress Lilith." He said, serving the girls their meals. Shrimp scampi spaghetti with a side of steamed broccoli. The girls clapped and laughed, clearly pleased and impressed.

"Thank you, Jervis." Ruby and Lilith said gratefully, flashing the butler a small smile.

"Anything to make you happy, my Mistresses." Jervis said, giving the girls a formal bow before moving to stand off to the side.

"I hope you enjoy your meal, Lilith." Ruby said, placing her napkin in her lap and Lilith followed suit. "I had the chefs make your favorite."

"You always know how to make me happy." Lilith said, almost swooning. "Oh!" Lilith suddenly squealed joyfully. Ruby hummed, looking up from her meal with a quirked brow. "My apologies, dear sister, but I got so excited." She said, blushing slightly. "But Ruby, please tell me, have you heard of this _juicy_ little rumor?" She asked. Ruby hummed once again, interested, and rested her fork on the edge of her plate. "Apparently there are three genuine Angels attending this college as we speak." Lilith informed, spinning her fork between her fingers, and watching as the spaghetti noodles wounded around the utensil.

"Is that so?" Ruby inquired, watching as Lilith peacefully ate her meal. Her every move calculated and even teasing. Lilith nodded, swallowing before she began to speak.

"Indeed. Brothers even." Lilith stated. "Please sister, will you not eat with me?" She asked, tilting. "You barely touched your food. But I believe that is my fault."

"I rather listen to you talk than eat." Ruby stated, pushing her food aside and balling up her napkin. Her eyes never left Lilith as she leaned forward to press her elbows on the table, entwining her fingers and resting her chin on her hands. "You _are_ far more appealing." She said, making Lilith giggle. "Please, continue."

"Well, I find it rather unfortunate by this new information." Lilith replied, continuing much to both their delight. "At first, I thought they were talking about you and I." She said, pouting with nonsatisfaction and disappointment.

"Even so, who could ever call us Angels?" Ruby asked, smiling in amusement. "Besides, I heard they destroy everything in their path like chemical warfare."

"Or gonorrhea!" Lilith laughed. "I heard that was their specialty, especially the blonde one. What a caveman!"

"It must be awful for the other one. You know, the fleshy one." Ruby said, chuckling to herself.

"Oh, but what about the milksop?" Lilith mentioned.

"Ah, the pansy." While the Malum Sisters continued to joke and laugh, the Anarchy Brothers continued to stew in utter rage.

"That's it." Lucifer hissed under his breathe, slamming his fists down on the table and causing it to rattle. "I can't take this anym-" However he wasn't the only one who had had enough; Castiel roared in anger, flipping the table over entirely and causing it to crash into a wall. Castiel then turned to the Malum Sisters, stomping towards them.

"Milksop? Pansy?!" Castiel screamed, staring daggers at the sisters, his fists clenched at his sides. "Who the ever-loving-fuck do you think you are?! I am **NOT**  some shitty side character!" Castiel screamed, his eyes glowing a threatening blue. The Winchesters swore, scurrying to their feet to hold Castiel back. "And what in absolutely **HELL** is wrong with being an Angel?! And how dare you call my brothers 'fleshy' and 'a caveman'?!" The closer he got to the sisters, the harder Dean and Sam strained to hold him back. "You think you're so perfect, don't you? 'Hi, our mommy is the mayor and we're full of shit'!"

"Aww, have we struck a nerve?" Lilith asked teasingly. "What were your names again?" She asked, trying to remember, as if she could forget.

"Don't act all innocent!" Castiel raged, his eyes glowing brighter. "I'm gonna rearrange your face!"

"Instead of fighting, how about we settle the score another way?" Ruby suggested, and everyone suddenly paused.

"Like what?" Gabriel asked, interested in what Ruby had in mind. Hell, Castiel even calmed down to hear her out.

"A little contest. Compare and contrast, you could say." Ruby explained. Lucifer and Gabriel exchanged glances, before agreeing to their terms. "We shall let the humans decide." She said, her eyes pinpointed on the student body—Sam and Dean included. "You first."

"Manners." Castiel declared, tossing the crowd an almost unnoticeable wink.

"Beauty." Lilith replied, flipping her hair over her shoulder.

"Gracefulness." Gabriel mused, blowing a sweet kiss to the audience.

"Physical proportion." Ruby aforesaid, a hint of smugness in her voice.

"Status." Lucifer decided, speaking confidently while he batted his eyelashes innocent.

"Education." Lilith forenamed, earning a small scoff.

"Fashion." Gabriel claimed, crossing his arms and jutting out his hip.

"Credible." Ruby said, raising an eyebrow. With each category, the students swapped sides. Until the Anarchy Brothers and Malum Sisters had the scores they were looking for. However it turned out to be a tie. "There seems to be a tie." Ruby stated, tsking in disappointment.

"Then we need a tie breaker." Castiel stated, his eyes trailing from the Winchesters to his brothers to the Malum Sisters. Everyone hummed in deep thought until Lilith spoke:

"Love." She declared.

"What?" Team Free Will inquired.

"Love." She repeated simply. "How well do you show affection, if any at all." Lilith said, giggling to herself.

"Let us see here." Ruby hummed, taking out a file. "Lucifer Anarchy, the Embodiment of Lust. Gabriel Anarchy, the Embodiment of Gluttony. Castiel Anarchy, the Embodiment of Chastity." The Angels froze, their skin turning sheet white. "Lucifer, claims that love equals humanity and weakness." Lucifer clenched his fists and gritted his teeth. "Gabriel, refuses to even talk about true emotion and lies constantly to receive 'treats'." Gabriel nearly choked, cupping his hands over his mouth and squeezing his eyes shut. "Castiel, a mere virgin." Castiel bit his bottom lip to hold back a whimper, batting his eyelashes to keep the tears back. Ruby chuckled and snapped the file shut, smiling confidently and triumphantly. Slowly and reluctantly, the students threaded towards the Malum Sisters. All except for Sam and Dean, who stood frozen in front of the Angels. However it didn't matter. Ruby and Lilith won. "Well, it seems you lose."

"See you next fall." Lilith joked as she snapped her fingers. Looking down, the Angels gasped in disbelief as the floor underneath them opened up. Screaming, the Angels fell into the dark abyss. "No!" Dean and Sam cried out, and without a second thought the brothers followed after the Angels in the abyss.

* * *

"Sammy? Sammy? Sammy..." Forcing his eyes open, Sam met with concerned green eyes. "Hey. You alright, Sam?" Dean asked, his brows furrowed in distress. Sam groaned, wriggling in pain. Looking around, Sam found himself in some dark unknown place with his head nuzzled in Gabriel's lap.

"You landed kinda hard, Samster." Gabriel stated, giving Sam a strained chuckle.

"Is everyone here?" Sam asked anxiously. He wasn't the least bit worried about himself. Gabriel smiled and nodded. "That's all I need to know." Sam said, beaming. Sitting up with a grunt, Sam quietly continued to explore his surroundings.

"Those dumb whores." Dean fumed. "Who the fuck do they think they are?"

"Liars." Castiel claimed, speaking so quietly that his voice almost didn't reach Dean's ears. "They were lying. Especially Ruby." He murmured. Dean turned to his friend to see the Angel had his head buried in his knees.

"What about you talking about, Cas?" Dean asked, puzzled.

"What Ruby said about Lucifer and Gabriel." Castiel elaborated, picking up his head to stare back at Dean with saddened eyes. "She was lying."

"But not about you?" Dean asked. Castiel shook his head.

"That part is very much true, about my vi-virginity." Castiel stuttered, blushing almost shamefully. "Everything else was a lie."

"What I said." Lucifer spoke in a whisper, grabbing everyone's attention. "About love. That was a long time ago when humanity was first created. I was jealous and seeking attention." He admitted, mumbling. Not only was Lucifer assuring Sam and Dean, but he was also defending himself. "I just don't understand how she would know that." He grumbled, digging his fist in the ground.

"I'm not like that anymore." Gabriel jumped in. "I don't lie to get sex, I learned that wasn't necessary nor was—or is—it right. I was young and stupid, I didn't know any better."

"Guys!" The Angels sucked in a breathe, cautious and intimated. "We're not judging you." Sam said, reassuring the Angels. "Sometimes we say and do things we don't really mean."

"So we're forgiven?" Lucifer asked hopefully. Dean scoffed and pulled Lucifer into a much needed hug.

"Don't ask stupid questions." Dean said softly. Lucifer hesitated, but soon relaxed and returned the embrace.

"Do I get a hug too?" Gabriel asked, holding out his arms to Sam, all-the-while making grabby hands. Sam rolled his eyes, but gladly pulled the Archangel into a hug anyway.

"You too, Cas." Dean said, grabbing Castiel's attention. "Group hug!" He cheered. The group of friends laughed, pulling each other close. "I usually say 'no chick-flick moments', but this is nice." Dean admitted. Suddenly Castiel's phone rung, startling them. "And now the moment is gone..." Castiel answered with a soft sigh, putting the caller on speaker. It was Michael.

_"Angels, I picked up on your location."_ Michael announced.

"Ok then, 'new God', where are we?" Sam leered, making Gabriel laugh. Usually he and Lucifer were the ones that poked fun at Michael.

_"In the 'basement level' of the university, also known as the Ghost Plant. Which so happens to belong to the Malum Sisters."_ Michael stated. _"If you look behind you..."_ He instructed. Quickly they turned around to see thousands and thousands of Ghosts being constructed, and a large tower with a strange glowing red stone being its source of power.

"How did we not see that?" Dean inquired, the group tilting their heads in unison.

"Well, well, well." A familiar cheap voice chimed. Team Free Will immediately faced an almost unnoticed staircase to see Lilith and Ruby. "Look what the fat cat threw up."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, Ruby and Lilith are here. You might notice that Ruby and Lilith are acting rather OOC. Don't worry, that's intentional. You'll figure out soon as to why, but just know that the new behavior is for a certain Queen of Hell.
> 
> So now you've met Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Castiel, Chuck, Amara, Donatello, Sam, Dean, Jess, and Brady. Now we have Ruby, Lilith, and Jervis. Who else shall we meet as this adventure continues?


	7. Anarchy and Malum: Angels vs Demons

"Evening." Lilith greeted, a pleased smile gracing her face. "You all must have went down the wrong trapdoor, our apologies." She said, although she didn't sound all that apologetic. "Still, that does not change the fact that you all are trespassing."

"We're not the ones that pulled the switch, now did we?" Dean inquired, pointing upwards to indicate where they fell from. "Ya'know, this looks like pretty shitty business." Dean said, a mischievous gleam in his eyes. "Especially for young ladies of your status such as yourselves." Dean pointed out mockingly. "So, what exactly are you fugly bitches up to?"

"Why, I would be delighted to educate you." Ruby said, ignoring Dean's insults. "What you are observing, my little trolls, is the headquarters to a very crucial undertaking." She explained proudly. "You see, we took our experiment for a test drive yesterday and are permitting mass production." Ruby informed. "Soon you melodious 'Angels' will be unable to surpass any Ghosts due to sheer volume."

"Not that we don't support your little dreams or anything, but you're putting my brother to sleep with your constant talking." Gabriel said, pointing to Castiel, who was literally trying to fight off sleep. "Besides," He smirked upon feeling the power building up within himself, Lucifer, and Castiel. "I need a candy bar, so let's do this already."

"Repent!"

 

_Raising his hand, a glowing halo appeared above Lucifer's head. Throwing it down, the Archangel created a dancefloor. A performance space for himself and his brothers. Lucifer wore a white sleeveless button-front vest top, white shorts with a gold belt that had a rouge heart attached and a matching gold chain to hang from his belt buckle, a gold leather O-ring choker, gold coiled armbands, a single gold dovetail bangle on his left wrist, and gold gladiator sandals accompanied by his striped stockings. Gabriel was clad in a white tunic coupled with a silver belt that had a golden heart attached, a white lace choker, silver bangles, long white fingerless lace gauntlets, and silver knee-high gladiator sandals. Castiel donned a white sleeveless turtleneck crop top, white skinny jeans paired with a bronze belt that had raven black hearts attached to either side of his hips, a thick white leather choker with a bronze heart, and his blue legwarmers topped with bronze gladiator sandals. Halos and wings flashed, giving them a more graceful appearance. Lucifer and Gabriel spun onto the poles, completely in sync as they dipped back and hooked their leg around the pole, performing a Gemini. Expressions of pure bliss on their face as their wings and halos flashed again. Castiel climbed and spun around the pole, the cold metal settling between his legs as he spun and glided through the air, performing a Viva Seat. Eyes fluttering close, his wings and halo flashing as he continued to float through the air. Slowly and skillfully, the Angels swiftly twirled off their poles, spinning on the balls of their feet to present themselves to their audience. Lucifer glided his hands down his sides, sliding to the floor. Castiel ghosted his hands over his stomach while Lucifer glided his hands down his sides, both Angels slipping to the floor in unison. Gabriel combed his hands through his hair, tugging on the strands and moaning with every pull._

_**Oh pitiful shadow lost in darkness;** _

_Gabriel flashed a smile as he blew a kiss, slipping his hands between his legs, teasing himself._

_**Oh evil spirit born of those drifting between Heaven and Earth;** _

_Staying in sync, Lucifer and Castiel removed their garments, giving each other gummy smiles._

_**May the thunderous power from these holy delicate males strike down upon you with great vengeance and furious anger** _

_Gabriel bent over, taking off his boxers all-the-while smirking confidently._

_**Shattering your loathsome impurities and returning you from once you came.** _

_Lucifer, Gabriel, and Castiel held up their garments. Grins on their faces as the lingerie started glowing dimly._

_**Repent you motherfucker!** _

 

"This might come as a real shock to you, but we're real Angels." Lucifer stated cockily. "So, yeah, these are real." He motioned to Crotchless, Hellfire and Hellion, Diaphanous and Irenic, and even the pistols hidden in the Winchesters' boots. "We don't wanna hurt you, since we don't really harm civilians. But we will if it comes down to it."

"But I'm sure you can take a couple of hits." Gabriel insisted, cocking his pistol. "As Archangels, me and Lucifer tend not to hold back. Castiel might show you a little mercy though." He joked, snickering to himself. "Get ready." He challenged. "You're about to taste the power of Lucifer, Gabriel, and Castiel Anarchy."

"Those revolting little popinjays just will not give up." Ruby said to Lilith. Although she didn't sound the least bit upset. More like determined.

"Sister, I believe these Angels need a little schooling." Lilith decided, eager and just as determined. Gabriel lowered his gun, glancing between Lucifer and Castiel. Lucifer looked just as confused, but Castiel's eyes were narrowed in suspicion. Like he was waiting for something to happen.

"Indeed." Ruby agreed. "And the most inestimable lessons are the most laborious." She said smoothly.

"This may come as a shock to you, but Ruby and I are _not_ human." Lilith said to Team Free Will. Having enough of building suspense, two spaded tails wriggled from underneath their skirts and the two girls flashed their fangs, giving Team Free Will teasing smiles.

"Revel." The Earth beneath their feet then started to crack and shadowed light shined upon the Demons.

 

**Raising her hand, a glowing halo appeared above Ruby's head. But then the halo cracked and became corrupted. Throwing it down, the Demon created a dancefloor. A performance space for herself and her sister. Ruby wore a leather black cutout bustier bralette, a leather black mini skirt coupled with a bolted belt that had a crack marigold heart attached which acted as a belt buckle, a studded velvet choker, a marigold cobra coiled armlet on her right forearm, a stainless pair of marigold star-studded earrings, two marigold leather wrap bracelets for each wrist, and over-the-knee leather black heeled boots. Lilith adored a muse leather black bralette, a leather black mini-pencil skirt paired with a studded belt that had broken copper hearts attached to either side of her hips, a thick copper leather double O-ring choker, copper leather elbow length fingerless gloves, and black low-wedge heels accompanied by her silk black kneesocks. Wings along with horns and tails flashed, giving them a more demonic appearance. Ruby spun her way up the pole, swinging around twice and wrapping the pole between her legs, curling up into a ball and letting herself glide through the air to display a Drama Queen. Lilith climbed to the very top of the pole, before swinging her way 'round the pole and then opening her legs, her hand outstretched over and underneath her as she leaned back, giving her audience a perfect view as she preformed an Eye Opener. The girls giggled as their bat-like wings, nubby horns, and spaded tails flashed once more. Untangling themselves, the Demons spun and dipped down to the floor simultaneously with smirks on the faces.**

_Break o Earth;_

**Ruby arched her back while her fingers danced over her glowing skin, down to her skirt and slipping between her thighs.**

_Dry up o sea;_

**Giggling to herself, Lilith slid her palms over her naval to her knees, her fingers peeking through her kneesocks as she toed off her heels.**

_Burn out o sun;_

**Staying in sync, the sisters discarded their thongs and kneesocks _—_ **respectively—sharing mischievous smirks.****

_****Grant us power Earthly leaders and Gate Keepers of Hell_

**Ruby and Lilith held up their garments. The same mischievous smirks on their faces as the lingerie started glowing dimly.**

_****Guide us Demons of the Underworld._ _We are High Class Demon Commanders!_

 

Lilith twirled her kneesocks with grace and skill, her eyes fluttering close as they connected and turned into one weapons. Whirling the glowing weapon in the air, the wine purple glow then disbursed to present double-headed meteor hammers known as Bruiser. Reeling the glowing lingerie, Ruby herself spun on her toes, dancing as it seemed. The Demon spun alongside her glowing weapon as if it were her partner until the light burst and she stopped altogether, showcasing twin revolvers dubbed Bloodlust and Bloodshed. Unlike the Heavenly Weapons which were ivory and electric blue with engravings of smooth wings and swift swirls, Hellish Weapons were pure black and electric crimson with carvings of broken wings and sharp swirls.

"Allow us to properly introduce ourselves." Lilith declared, moving to stand in front of Ruby. Ruby smiled down fondly at her sister, gently turning her around and resting her chin on top of Lilith's head, wrapping a protective and possessive arm around Lilith's midsection. Lilith smiled to herself, placing her hand on top of Ruby's.

"My name is Ruby Malum, the Protector of the Special Child." Ruby said, introducing herself proudly.

"My name is Lilith Malum, the First White-Eyed Demon." Lilith said, introducing herself with the same pride.

"We are High Class Demon Commanders underneath the Queen of Hell." They spoke cockily, their spaded tails coiling around one another's leg.

"Fuck me." Gabriel said, running a hand through his hair. "Demons, Dominatrixes, _and_ incestuous. You two are full of fucking surprises." Glancing at Lucifer, the two Archangels have each other knowing nods.

"Ya'know something? I've been around for a long time and I never knew Hell had its very own Queen." Lucifer said, snickering to himself as he took off his boxers.

"I should've known you were Demons by your names." Castiel said, tightening his grip around Diaphanous and Irenic. "I had this feeling upon hearing about your arrival through Donatello and had Raphael run your names. I never through she would be right."

"How fascinating. A mere Seraph such as yourself knows who we are." Ruby said, pulling away from Lilith. "Castiel, is it? You want to know what I have learned from you?" She asked, and Castiel nodded. "I learned that it is cute to believe good triumphs over evil, but Lilith and I are Demons." She said, smirking at the Angel.

"And by design, we are impossible to defeat." Lilith finished.

"This is about to get real embarrassing for you." Gabriel said, taking Lucifer's boxers and transforming them into an exact copy of Crotchless. "'By design', we're about to kick your sorry asses." He declared, as he and Lucifer readied for battle. Ruby and Lilith did the same, licking their lips, eagerness in their eyes. Wordlessly, the Archangels and Demons released their wings. Standing tall and strong.

"Let's do this!"

"Actually guys," Castiel started, grabbing his brothers' attention. "I know you wish to kill each other, which is perfectly fine, I'm not judging you." He said, babbling just slightly. "But now that I think about it, shouldn't our first priority be getting the Ghoststone?" He asked. This caused everyone to pause.

"Oh yeah, that does make more sense." Gabriel said, knocking the heel of his palm against his temple.

"Yeah, about that..." Lucifer trailed off, pointing upwards. "I don't mean to alarm anyone, but the Ghoststone appears to be missing." Glancing over their shoulders, Ruby and Lilith couldn't help but scream in horror. The stone _was_ missing.

"Where is it?!" Ruby yelled accusingly at the Angels.

"Cough it up, now!" Lilith demanded.

"Please." Gabriel scoffed. "We don't even have it and we have not idea where it could be now."

"We didn't even have a fucking plan." Lucifer added, defending his brother. "What makes you think we could pull something like this off last minute?" He asked, rolling his eyes. Searching for the stone wildly, the sisters saw the Winchesters running away from the scene.

"There!"

"Fuck!" Dean swore, nearly tripping over his own two feet.

"Run Dean, they spotted us!" Sam screamed, panicking.

"Yeah, I know that!" Dean replied. "Demons, they just had to be Demons! Not only that, but these bitches are crafty-"

"Shut up and fucking run, damnit!" Sam interrupted, encouraging his brother to run faster, all-the-while passing the Ghoststone back and forth.

"Where are you going?!" Ruby screamed, firing at the Winchesters. Moving quickly, Lucifer jumped in the way. Deflecting the bullets and helping the Winchesters escape.

"Your fight is with me." Lucifer said, putting his guard up.

"Lilith! After them!" Ruby commanded. Nodding, Lilith chased after Sam and Dean. Without a necessary command, Gabriel and Castiel tailed the Demon. "After I finish you off, I will gladly tear apart your disgusting little boyfriend." Ruby claimed. "Dean, was it?" She taunted, cocking her revolvers at the Archangel.

"I won't let you touch him." Lucifer promised, glaring at the Demon. "Bring it, you stupid bitch."

* * *

"Get out of the fucking the way!" Dean screamed at the students, pushing them out of his and Sam's way.

"Dean, she's catching up!" Sam pointed out. "Move!"

"Give up!" Lilith yelled, cackling. "You really think you two are faster than me?!"

"We don't necessarily have to be faster, we just have to outrun you!" Dean yelled back at the younger Demon, making her frown. Suddenly Lilith let out a sharp whistle and paused her chasing, leaving the brothers confused and frightened. What was she planning?

"G-string!" Lilith cried out. Dean and Sam shared a look. The ground then rumbled and thunder struck, causing the boys to stumble and fall to the ground. The sound of a car horn then alarmed them. Looking around their shoulders, they saw a black SUV limo chasing after them. Scrambling to their feet, the boys continued to run as the limo chased after them. They could clearly see Lilith inside, peering from the backseat as Jervis drove the SUV.

"Dumb whore!" Dean griped, blowing raspberries at the Demon like a child.

"Let's not insult the girl riding in a limousine!" Sam retorted, scolding his brother. Dean's eyes bounced around the hall, looking for an escape route as the limo came closer. That's when he saw the flight of stairs and an idea popped in his head.

"Tag!" Dean threw the Ghoststone to Sam, pushing him towards the stairwell. "You're it, Sammy!" Diving towards the wall, Dean watched as the limo followed Sam like a game of Cat and Mouse.

"Dean!" Gabriel and Castiel ran to the winded Winchester, helping him stand. "Where's the stone?" Gabriel asked, his eyes trailing over Dean's form to see the Ghoststone wasn't on his person.

"With Sam." Dean answered. "I'm pretty sure Sam is still being chased by Lilith." He added, nodding to himself.

"Pretty sure? You're pretty sure?" Gabriel questioned. "You really left him with Lilith? Are you crazy?!" Gabriel barked at Dean angrily.

"I have a plan." Dean said dismissively, assuring Gabriel.

"You wanna share with the class, Dean-o?" Gabriel asked, crossing his arms and jutting out his hip. His stance judgmental and assertive.

"Whistle for Transparent."

Meanwhile with Lucifer  
Campus lounge

"Ya'know something?" Lucifer crouched over Ruby, gripping her dark tresses and lifting her head. Gazing at her bloody temple and scrapped up face. "The moment you appeared on campus," He started, slamming her head against the marble floor. "I got a funny feeling from you." Lucifer stated, slamming her head once more on the ground, causing the marble to crack. "I just thought it was jealousy, but I then figured I just didn't like you." He said, tightening his grip on Ruby's brown locks. "And do you know why?" He asked, but Ruby didn't answer. "Because," Lucifer continued anyway. "I was able to get a glimpse of your true face. I knew you were a Demon, but I doubted myself. Thinking my eyes were playing tricks on me. But now I know the truth."

"Quit your fucking babbling, I don't want to hear it." Ruby grumbled.

"Finally using contractions, huh? And cuss words too!" Lucifer teased. "For a second, I thought you had a limited vocabulary."

"I'm going to kick your ass."

"I'm sorry, say that again. What was that about kicking my ass?" Lucifer taunted, essentially loosening his grip on her hair. Ruby growled, tugging her hair from his hold and sweeping her legs under his feet. Lucifer yelped and fell on his ass, giving Ruby time to flip their position.

"I never did care for pain." Ruby chuckled, fisting his short locks and smashing his head against the brick wall. Bringing his head back, Ruby got a view of his new bloody nose.

"What?" Lucifer asked, bringing himself to give Ruby a smile. "Masochism not your style?"

"Lilith prefers receiving pain." Ruby stated, a twinkle of fondness and lust in her eyes. "Me? I prefer giving pain."

"Sadism." Lucifer whispered, nodding to himself as best as he could. "Then you won't like this." Elbowing the Demon in the gut, Lucifer slipped from underneath her. "Enough of the foreplay." Lucifer decided, licking the dripping blood from his lips. Ruby laughed, spitting some blood on the floor.

"My thoughts exactly." Ruby said, agreeing. The two then darted across the room and frantically started searching for their beloved weapons, all-the-while throwing childish insults at each other. Once they found their respectable weapons, the Archangel and Demon face one another. Circling each other. "Enough fooling around, Lucifer." Ruby demanded, blowing her bangs out of her eyes.

"You might wanna keep the curtains closed." Lucifer joked, pointing to her forehead. "It ain't a pretty sight."

"As is your bloody nose." Ruby said jokingly, chuckle humorously.

"I'll take bloody over broken." Lucifer said, rolling his eyes. Ruby huffed, a scowl replacing her cocky smile.

"Can we cease this chatter? As you heathens say, you're boring to death."

"Don't tempt me."

* * *

'I think I finally lost her.' Sam though, panting heavily as he keeled forward to catch his breathe. He managed to lose Lilith on his way to the roof, which wasn't that hard since he was pretty sure a SUV limousine catch climb a three flights of stairs and two ladders. He used to be in track-n-field, so he should know.

"Sammy!" Sam quickly perked up and smiled gleefully upon seeing Dean.

"Dean!" The two brothers laughed joyfully as they embraced.

"Glad to see you're still alive." Dean said happily, sighing in relief as they parted from their hug. Dean smiled brightly, patting Sam's back before giving him the once over. "And lookie here, not a single scratch." He said, pleased upon seeing Sam unharmed.

"Yeah, no thanks to you and your genius plan." Sam said, earning a laugh from his brother.

"Hey, you still got the stone, right Sammy?" Dean asked hopefully.

"Yeah." Sam answered, nodding. "Its safe, I promise."

"Good." Suddenly Sam and Dean yelled as their legs buckled, the brothers falling to their knees before they could catch themselves or retaliate. A thick chain was then wrapped around Dean's neck and a gun was pointed at the back of Sam's head. "Now," Lilith tightened the chain around Dean's throat just slightly, causing Dean to gasp. "I recommend you hand over the Ghoststone, otherwise you might lose your head." Lilith told Dean, giving him a warning.

"No way in Hell, Queen of Hearts." Dean joked, snickering under his breath to himself.

"Even near death you jest." Lilith scowled. "Have you gone mad?"

"A few exes have told me that once or twice, yeah." Dean replied, smirking up at the younger Demon.

"You really are a fool." Lilith said, shaking her head. "It's a crying shame, really, seeing you cause the death of your younger brother." She said, forcing Dean to face Sam. Sam had his eyes clenched shut as Ruby took her gun off safety. Dean sucked in a breathe before he quickly closed his eyes, not wanting to see his baby brother get his brain blown out. That was until a bullet grazed Ruby's cheek. Looking up in surprise, the Winchesters and the Malum Sisters met with golden eyes. Gabriel. The little Archangel laid on the floor of the old bell tower on his stomach, a sniper rifle in his hands and a lollipop between his lips.

"Yo!" Gabriel called out, waving to the sisters as he shifted the rifle back into his pistols. Jumping down from the tower, Gabriel walked towards the Demons as Lucifer appeared at his side with a flutter of wings. "Looks like my backup is here." Gabriel said, glancing to Lucifer.

"No worries." Lilith said dismissively, continuing to tighten the chain around Dean's neck. "But I wouldn't take another step closer if I were you." She advised. However, much to her surprise, Lucifer and Gabriel showed no hesitation whatsoever.

"Do it." Lucifer challenged. "Make a move or don't, whichever you prefer."

"You'd sacrifice your friends for your own perseverance?" Lilith asked in disbelief and doubt. But that doubt was washed away as the Angels kept advancing. "You're Angels!" Lilith argued, but Lucifer and Gabriel didn't seem to care.

"Lilith." Ruby spoke sternly.

"Yeah, we're Angels." Lucifer said in agreement. "But we're also tired and bored." He added, unfazed. "We already got Castiel waiting in the car, so let's make this quick."

"You three are the most disgusting creatures! You, Gabriel, and Castiel!" Lilith screamed, her grasp on her chains loosening.

"Lilith, calm down and finish the job." Ruby ordered, her glare shifting between the Winchesters, the Archangels, and Lilith. But Lilith shook her head and continued to ignore her.

"What kind of Angel doesn't have morals?!" Lilith carped, her focus slipping between her fingers—literally. "Hello, this is your friend I'm about to behead! My sister is a second away from blowing your other friend's brains out! You're sorta supposed to care!"

"Yeah right." Lucifer snorted. "Ruby isn't brave enough to pull that trigger." He said, smirking at Sam. "As for him," He refocused his gaze to Dean. "I think it would be best to cross one more item off the poor sap's bucket list before you knock his head clean off. So why don't you straddle his face and give him a last meal?" He suggested, causing Lilith's cheeks to turn red in embarrassment. "Such a delicious way to go, ain't it Dean-o?" Lucifer asked, winking at Dean.

"Enough of this!" Ruby screamed, having enough of everyone's shit. "Fucking die, you rancorous whores!" She glowered, firing at the Archangels. Gabriel and Lucifer stopped advancing, standing still. Gabriel narrowed his eyes in concentration and fired back. His bullets came in contact with the others, but not all. The sisters grinned in triumph. Lucifer yawned in boredom, deflecting the bullets with ease. The bullets reflected back at the sisters and knocked their weapons out their hands. Sam and Dean didn't even give them a chance to react.

"Gabriel!" Sam shouted, throwing the Ghoststone high up in the air.

"Got it!" Gabriel aimed at the stone and fired off one last bullet. As the bullet came in contact with the Ghoststone, it shattered into millions of pieces before everyone's eyes. And then the building started quaking, throwing them all off balance.

"Don't think you've won." Lilith said as Ruby whistled for Jervis and G-string. "We'll be back."

"Don't worry." Gabriel assured as Lucifer whistled for Castiel and Transparent. "We'll keep our guard up."

Later that night  
The Angels' Residence

"We can't apologize enough, guys, really." Castiel said apologetically, bowing his head in shame.

"Cas, we already told you, me and Dean forgive you." Sam said, patting the Angel on the back. "You didn't know the school was gonna blow up." He said, trying to reassure his friend. "Besides, a break would be nice until they rebuild the university." _To recap, after Gabriel destroyed the Ghoststone the entire university started to destroy itself. Because the Ghost Plant was directly under the college campus, when the Ghost Plant caught on fire and broke down, so did the school. The Angels took full responsible and kept apologizing whenever they got the chance. Sam and Dean forgave them every time though. Well, Sam kept speaking for Dean, since Dean hadn't spoken a word since being saved. Castiel and Michael just thought he was still in shock, while Sam and Gabriel thought he was just tired from the whole ordeal. Lucifer didn't know what was wrong with Dean..._ "Go to bed, Cas." Sam insisted, but Castiel shook his head. Sam took Castiel by the chin and tilted his head up, meeting with sleepy blue eyes. "Please, you're falling asleep standing up. Go to bed." He said softly. This time Castiel nodded reluctantly and then disappeared. "I'm gonna help Gabriel turn in too, ok?" Sam said to Lucifer and Dean, carefully picking up Gabriel off the floor as not to wake him. It was a tiring day and once they had returned to the church, Gabriel had hurriedly flopped to the floor and was out cold since. "How about when I get back we watch a movie?" Sam suggested, fixing Gabriel as the Archangel was laying bridal style in his arms. Lucifer and Dean silently agreed. "Good." Sam then turned around and disappeared into the blackened hallway. Leaving Lucifer and Dean alone.

"Hey," Lucifer finally spoke up, standing to his feet. "I'm gonna go make some popcorn. Does it matter what flavor?" Lucifer asked. Instead if properly answering, Dean just gave the Archangel a deadly glare before returning his gaze to the black screen of the TV. "Still giving us the silent treatment?" He asked, and like he predicted he got no response in return. "Ok, what's your fucking problem?"

"You really wanna know?" Dean spoke, his voice low and almost inaudible.

"And so he speaks." Lucifer replied sarcastically. "Yeah, I wanna know!"

"You really wanna know?" Dean repeated. "You really wanna know what my fucking problem is?!" Dean barked, jumping to his feet and facing Lucifer.

"Yes!"

"Fine!" Dean yelled in frustration, finally giving in. "What you said was completely unacceptable!" Dean shouted, clenching his fists. Lucifer's anger wavered and a puzzled expression spread across his face. 'What I said?' Lucifer thought. "Back on the battlefield when you told Lilith to straddle my face and give me my last meal." Dean elaborated. "What you said was so out of line and embarrassing. You just don't understand how hurt I was, knowing you were ready to sacrifice my life." He said. "Sammy's life." He quickly added softly. "I find it hard to believe that you might actually care." Dean said, mumbling. "Do you care?"

"About what?" Lucifer asked, furrowing his eyebrows in curiosity.

"Do you even care about Sammy and me?" Dean asked, but Lucifer shook his head.

"Dean, I think you're asking the wrong question."

"Don't turn this around."

"I'm not." Lucifer said, shaking his head once again. "Dean, I think you're asking the wrong question." He repeated. "So Dean, why don't you ask the right question?"

"I am asking you the right question, you asshole!" Dean snapped. "Just admit it!" He yelled accusingly. "Just admit that you don't give a damn about me!" His eyes widened in realization. Lucifer's eyes softened. "Don't give me that look, I don't need your pity." Dean seethed, avoiding his gaze.

"I'm not pitying you, Dean, really." Lucifer said, assuring his friend that his eyes were showing Dean empathy. "Please know that I do care about you and Sam, especially you." He added, holding out his hand for Dean to take. "I can't believe you would ever think that."

"Of course I would." Dean grumbled, slapping Lucifer's hand away.

"Dean, you gotta trust me." Lucifer said, holding out his hand again. Dean bit the inside of his cheek in thought, letting Lucifer speak. But refused to take his hand. Still, Lucifer held out his hand. "I never meant to make you feel some type of way. It was just a trick. Making them think we didn't care." Dean stared at Lucifer with shining green eyes, thinking. Slowly relaxing, Dean took Lucifer's hand and they both sat down. Soon after Dean punched Lucifer's shoulder.

"That was for making me feel like a piece of shit." Dean said, earning a sheepish smile. Dean smiled back and leaned forward to kiss Lucifer's cheek, surprising the Archangel. "Don't look so shocked." Dean said, laughing. "That was for saving me."


	8. Place Your Bets

The next two weeks in the Angels' Residence had went perfectly fine. Sorta. Around the first week, the Winchesters had called Bobby to tell him that the university burned to the ground and that they would be staying over with a couple of friends for a little while. Dean had completely forgiven Lucifer and now that they had a break from college—until it was rebuilt—Dean had plenty of time to plan trips. Sam had enough time to hang out with Jess and Brady, whether it was in person or through Skype. But around the second week... The second week wasn't so great. To say Michael was angry was an understatement. He was pissed. Yeah, he almost lost his brothers and the Winchesters to the hands of the Malum Sisters a mere two weeks ago, but that didn't excuse Lucifer and Gabriel from maxing out their credit card. That Michael obviously paid for. Wasting money was no laughing matter, but to be completely honest, Lucifer and Gabriel gave absolutely no fucks.

"Listen up cock jockeys, I'm not just talking to fucking hear myself!" Michael screamed, finally grabbing his brothers' attention.

"I really must congratulate you, Mikey. You really do have a filthy mouth." Lucifer joked, teasing his brother.

"Put a fucking cork in it, fuckface." Michael grumbled, rolling his eyes. "I understand that you two don't give a damn, but Castiel and I do!" Michael gestured to the little Angel, who shuffled on his feet nervously. "Hell, even Sam and Dean are worried about our money problems." He motioned to the Winchesters, who were discussing quietly, no doubt calculating how much they spent on the credit card in hopes they could pitch in. "Do you two understand you wasted a total of three MILLION dollars on shit you didn't need?!"

"What do you mean?" Gabriel asked, tilting his head. Michael rolled his eyes for the second time and took out a large list of items. A receipt.

"Several packs of flavored lube and vibrators from 'Sweet Dreams'. Toys that surprisingly _aren't_ sex toys. Clothes flown in from France. And who eats this much food?! You motherfuckers eat so much, you're gonna start sweating bacon grease!" Michael ranted, tossing Lucifer the bill. "Firstly, I must say I'm shocked. I thought the only toys you two knew about were dildos and fleshlights. Really, I didn't expect stuffed animals to be on the bill. Secondly, these clothes are way too expensive and half of them you don't even need. And thirdly, you don't need that many sex toys! I bet you have a whole _closet_ full of them!"

"Well, Mikey, sorry we wanna look sexy." Lucifer said jokingly. "And those stuffed animals were for Castiel as an early birthday gift, which is why they're mostly bee plushies."

"Castiel's birthday is on March 21st and it's the middle of August." Michael deadpanned.

"Details, details." Lucifer said, waving his hand dismissively.

"That still doesn't explain the lube and vibrators."

"Listen Mikey, when it comes to vibrators you can't stick to just one size, it gets boring real quick." Gabriel informed. "Plus others have different settings for more pleasure and the flavored lube is for when you're eating someone out or being eaten out." He explained like a smug pro.

"That's not the fucking point." Michael growled through gritted teeth.

"So you say all the time." Lucifer and Gabriel complained.

"Mikey, if you're gonna be a fucking baby, you might as well crawl back up your giant vagina where you belong." Lucifer taunted his older brother.

"Lucifer, Gabriel, this church is falling apart and I can't afford anymore repairs." Michael said, pointing to the dripping ceiling.

"We work our dicks off killing Ghosts, so enough with the preaching already." Gabriel said, pursing his lips in a thin line.

"That's not money, that's Heaven Coins." Michael pointed out. "Don't you get that when you take out the motherfucking city, I have to pay for it with my damn cash?" Michael explained, his eyebrow twitching in agitation.

"Mikey, you're being such a pussy about this." Lucifer said, standing to his feet in order to make a statement, and Gabriel followed suit. "If us earning money will shut your douche face, then fine." He declared. Michael took a pause, blinking in disbelief and doubt, before he started laughing.

"That's hilarious! You two earning money, like you have a single skill anyone would pay for!" Michael cackled, tears in his eyes.

"We too have skills!" Gabriel yelled in protest.

"How much were you bitching about us spending, what was it, three million dollars?" Lucifer asked, holding up three fingers.

"Just give us three days, ass-wipe!" Gabriel challenged.

"Very well then." Michael said, calming down his laughter. "I challenge you two-"

"You _three_." Gabriel corrected. "It's only fair that Cassie helps too." He asked, pointing to the Seraph, who was clearly surprised that his brothers would throw him under the bus. But it was no use in trying to convince his brothers to let him out of this deal. Besides, those stuffed bears were for him after all and it was only far if he helped.

"Fine." Michael sighed. "I challenge you three to make three million dollars in only three days." He said, holding up three fingers. "But when you fail, you will swear Heaven's unbreakable oath that you will never waste money again." Michael said, a slanted grin stretching across his lips. "And you know what will happen if that oath is broken!"

"And when we win, you're not allowed to bitch about our shopping habits again!"

"You have a deal!"

* * *

Later that afternoon  
Falls Park

"This sucks!" Lucifer complained loudly, falling onto the grass flat on his back in defeat. "I can't believe we actually accepted this challenge."

"All because your precious pride got in the way." Castiel sniped, glaring down at his older brother.

"Quiet, I'm thinking." Gabriel said, earning a huff from Castiel. "Look, I know you're upset, but there's no point in backing out now. And that goes for all of us. All we can do now is win Michael's bet." He said, his eyes shifting between his agitated brothers. "So, anybody got any ideas about how we're supposed to make this money?" Gabriel asked casually, scooping another spoonful of Ben & Jerry's ice-cream into his mouth.

"How about we stop buying more useless things?" Castiel suggested, snatching the Cherry Garcia ice-cream from Gabriel's hands.

"Jokes on you." Gabriel said, snatching the ice-cream out of Castiel's grasp. "I paid with my own hard earned cash, so ha!"

"Cash that you steal from Michael's wallet when he isn't looking." Castiel pointed out, jabbing Gabriel's forehead.

"He should know better than to leave it unattended." Gabriel criticized, rubbing his forehead with a wound pout.

"If you two are done arguing," Lucifer sat up with a grunt. "I was thinking we could steal from someone double loaded, ya'know, rich and drunk." He said with a halfhearted shrug.

"That's illegal." Castiel said, sighing heavily. "Maybe we should try this." Castiel suggested, snapping his fingers and making the daily newspaper appear in his hands. "People are always looking for workers through ads." He stated, holding up the newspaper.

"Well why didn't you just say so?" Gabriel asked, eagerly snatching up the newspaper. Flipping through each page and skimming through lines until he found a list of jobs that interested him. "Look!" Gabriel pointed excitedly, pointing to the words **HELP WANTED: WAITERS/WAITRESSES**. Lucifer and Castiel looked over his shoulder, following his finger to read about the job offer. "It says they need two or more people to work at the Comet Diner as servers."

"Apparently work experience and training are a 'package deal' while anyone with either a high school diploma or GED certificate can get the job." Castiel explaining, humming in interest. "Must be skilled in active listening, service orientation, speaking, social perceptiveness, and coordination. Must also be skilled in oral comprehension, oral expression, speech recognition, speech clarity, and arm-hand steadiness." Castiel noted. Gabriel glanced over his shoulder to give his brothers a cheeky smile.

"Oral, you say?" Gabriel asked interested, his tone joking. He and Lucifer snickered while Castiel frowned at them. "Oh stop, we're only joking." He said, turning back to the newspaper. "Oh shit! Its a '60s rollerblade café."

"A rollerblade café?" Castiel inquired.

"Sounds fun." Lucifer commented.

"Hell yeah! We could do this shit with our fucking eyes closed."

_They tried the little rollerblade café idea and it was fine. Lucifer and Gabriel were handling the job like pros. Catering to costumers, making sure that they were happy, easy as that. Unfortunately, they were still fired because of Castiel. Poor Castiel didn't know the first thing about skating. Unlike the Speed Skates that Lucifer and Gabriel were given_ , _Castiel was given Outdoor Skates. And even with Outdoor Skates, his skating didn't improve within the entire hour that they worked there. Somehow he both outstandingly and terrifyingly created countless mess after mess. It was like watching the Butterfly Effect._

_They tried being crossing guards, but that was a disaster. Apparently, within the thirty minutes of their shift, they had managed to distract the drivers which caused them all to crash. Lucifer didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing from the sound of it._

_They tried washing cars, but that too proven to be a fruitless task. Truthfully it was good for awhile. Due to them only being dressed in swim shorts, they pulled in a hefty amount of costumers. But Gabriel, being the Trickster that he is, couldn't help himself and kept vandalizing the vehicles or pranking the unexpected drivers along with passengers when he had the chance._

_They tried being carnival workers, but the Angels were proven to be a handful. Lucifer never did his job and insisted that he was on break. Gabriel kept sneaking off to raid the snack carts and also insisted he was on break. And Castiel didn't know how to properly operate any of the mechanical rides, which sadly caused them all to malfunction._

_And they tried being seers at some fancy hotel, but they didn't even last five minutes. Gabriel insisted on bugging the manager about their costumes, claiming they were outdated and stereotypical—to which he was right about. Lucifer would throw the costumers in a loop, answering them in playful riddles and nursey rhymes. And Castiel told the costumers he couldn't tell them their future because then bad things might happen. So it was back to the drawing board._

"Dude, working can fucking suck it." Gabriel whined loudly, adjusting his uniform. This was their last resorting: waitering. But since the Tipsy Lounge—the super fancy high-class bar they were currently working at—ran out of male uniforms, they had to settle with bunny outfits. So technically—and much to Dean's amusement—they were sexy bunny waiters. Complete with black rayon satin strapless front-twist bodysuits, sheer black pantyhose, perky rayon satin bunny ears, white collars and bowties, white cuffs paired with silver cufflinks, fluffy white cottontails, and high heels. Each Angel had specific colors to go with their uniform: Lucifer had red bunny ears, a red bowtie, and red high heels. Gabriel had gold bunny ears, a gold bowtie, and gold high heels. Castiel had blue bunny ears, a blue bowtie, and blue high heels. Despite the attire, the costumers had taken a liking to them. "Can you believe people actually do this shit all day?" He complained. Castiel sniffed, walking back towards his brothers with an empty serving trays under his arm.

"Honestly." Castiel scoffed, shaking his head and setting the empty tray on the clean bar counter. "You two aren't even helping." He scolded his brothers, but they just simply ignored him.

"Please, baby bro, you're handling everything just fine." Gabriel said jokingly, smiling at his baby brother. "So," He clapped his hands loudly. "Cassie, my dear, how much have we made so far?" Gabriel asked. "Its gotta at least be a million, right?" Castiel let out an exhale through his nose and shook his head. "What do you mean 'no'?"

"You know exactly what he means, Gaby." Dean voiced, clearly amused. "You three kept getting fired, so you haven't made anything yet."

"Don't fuck with me!" Gabriel snapped, slamming his fist on the countertop. "We're supposed to make three million, so try again!" Gabriel demanded.

"We know, Gabriel." Sam spoke, ready to defend his brother if need be. "But you would need to make an average of one million per day, so there is no way in hell that's possible."

"Wow, you're so helpful, thank you." Gabriel said sarcastically.

"I know it sounds like I'm not rooting for you, but you know I'm right."

"Unless there was a way they could make three million dollars in one day." Dean said, injecting this seemingly silly thought as an idea.

"Oh yeah?" Sam inquired, raising a skeptical eyebrow. "And how would they do that?" He asked curiously.

"I just made three million bucks in one day! I'm a cash pirate!" Quickly perking up at attention, the group of five looked to another table. The table was occupied by a Caucasian man in casual attire, with two bunny waitresses in his arms and a large stack of cash in his shirt pocket. With a single knowing glance, the Angels made their way towards the man. Castiel gave the waitresses a smile and silently told them to shoo. And they did. Satisfied, Lucifer and Castiel slithered into the man's arms while Gabriel bravely leaped onto the man's lap.

"Hey Daddy." Gabriel greeted the man in the traditional Tipsy Bunny fashion, flashing the man his pearly whites and playful whiskey eyes. "So is it true? You _really_ made three million smackaroos in one day?" Gabriel asked sweetly, batting his eyelashes. The man chuckled.

"You better believe it, my sexy bunnies." He boasted. "I'll even let ya' stroke it if you're nice." He said, and Gabriel gave the man a cute giggle.

"Would you mind telling us how you got it?" Lucifer asked, running his fingertips down the buttons of the man's shirt and rubbing circles on his chest.

"Pretty please?" Castiel whined cutely, jutting out his bottom lip.

"Well if you really want to know, I'm a gambler." The man said. "I won it at a casino."

"What casino is that?" The Angels asked eagerly.

"The one down the street." The man stated. "All In, I think it was called." The Angels grinned.

"Thank you." Lucifer said gratefully. The Angels then stood up and hurriedly ran off, leaving the man beyond confused.

"Where are you all going?" Sam asked, just as confused, watching as the Angels headed towards the exit. All-the-while stripping themselves of their uniforms.

"To the casino!"

* * *

"Step aside bitches, the Angels have arrived!" Gabriel announced, relishing in the attention they were receiving.

"I have to say, you do clean up nicely." Sam said, eyes trailing the Angels in approval. Gabriel smirked and smoothed back his gelled hair, gladly presenting himself to Sam: he wore a black tux, white wing-collar shirt, a golden bowtie to compliment his eyes, and black court shoes.

"I agree." Dean said, eyes pinpointed on Lucifer. The Archangel grinned happily and showed himself off to the Winchester. Lucifer wore a wine-colored suit, a black tie that made his eyes pop, a matching black turndown-collar shirt, and black oxford dress shoes.

"Cassie doesn't look so bad either." Gabriel said, winking at his little brother. Castiel blushed; Castiel wore a cream-colored button-down coupled with a midnight black waistcoat, a matching bowtie, black dress pants, and black loafers to match.

"Too bad you boys didn't dress up." Lucifer said, and Gabriel pouted in agreement. Sam and Dean shrugged halfheartedly.

"We're not really into suits." Dean said dismissively.

"Bet you'd look good though." Lucifer complimented, making Dean blush. "C'mon." He then said, taking Dean by the shoulders.

"Where are we going?" Dean asked curiously, and Lucifer chuckled in reply.

"Don't think I haven't heard about you, my dear Winchester. I've heard you and Sammy gamble." Lucifer said, smirking at the Winchester.

"Yeah, but we've only ever gambled in pool."

"That's good enough." Gabriel said, latching onto Sam. And so the Anarchy Brothers left with their prized possessions. Castiel sighed, but followed close behind. There had to be a game he was good at.

Later that night  
The VIP Section

"Incredible!"

"Amazing!"

"They're beginners?!"

"Outstanding, Gabriel." A man complimented the Archangel. "Has anyone ever complimented you on your skills before?"

"Oh babe," Gabriel purred sweetly, holding out his champagne flute. "I have to say they most definitely do." He said, meaning much more than his winnings. Watching as the man poured him another glass of white wine.

"Gabriel, Lucifer," Castiel whispered to his brothers, leaning towards them. "I believe we've reached our goal." Castiel said, motioning to their winnings. The entire time they've been there, Castiel has been keeping track as to how much they've won each and every game. Gabriel was the luckiest between the three of them.

**Gabriel:**  
**$9,500,000**

**Lucifer:**  
**$3,700,000**

**Castiel:**  
**$5,200,000**

"You believe?" Lucifer repeated questionably, raising a brow, calmly and patiently sipping on his sparkling wine.

"Yes." Castiel answered. "I really do think we should cash in our winnings and go."

"Relax." Lucifer said dismissively. "If we already reached our goal we might as well have some more fun." He said, roughly patting Castiel's shoulder. "C'mon, Roulette some shit."

"Dealer change." Blinking, the Anarchy Brothers faced forward and saw a new person had took the place of the other dealer. A woman. She had long curly blonde hair styled tied-up in a messy bun, beautiful fair skin, and blue-gray eyes coupled with semi-rimless round glasses. She wore the standard white elbow-length button-down blouse, black bowtie, black dress pants, black three-button double-breasted vest, and black high heels. She looked familiar somehow.

"Hey sugar." Gabriel greeted sweetly, making the woman blush.

"Shall we play?" The woman asked quietly, pinching the white 21mm pill between her fingers.

"Hell yeah!" Gabriel cheered, making the woman smile. "But before we play, what's your name?" Gabriel asked. "I only ask because you don't have a nametag." He pointed out, his eyes pinpointed on the spot where the golden nametag would've been. The woman's smile widened as she spun the roulette wheel.

"Lily." She answered, and rolled the pill with a flick of her wrist. Her eyes watching intensely as the ball speedily circled the wheel. "Place your bets please."

"Let's make this interesting." Gabriel said excitedly, putting a fair amount of his chips on Black 11. After a couple of spins around the wheel, the ball began to lose momentum.

"No more bets, thank you." Lily said, trying to hide the smirk on her face, watching as the ball fell on Red 12. "Too bad." Lily said, stopping the wheel from spinning with a brush of her fingers. This was Gabriel's first time losing and now he was down to $3,700,000.

"Oh well." Lucifer said, shaking off the shock. "You can't win every time." He said, trying to reassuring his brother.

"True." Gabriel said quietly. "Let's roll again." He said, placing another large amount on Black 22. Lily nodded and spun the roulette wheel. After a couple of seconds, Lily rolled the pill. Team Free Will watched the white ball as the rotated around the wheel with such speed, almost like it was going faster than the first time.

"No more bets, thank you." Lily said, as the ball fell on Black 20. Gabriel watched in disbelief as his chips were scooped up, leaving him with only $2 million. But with determination and optimism, Gabriel slammed an ample amount of his chips on Black 15.

"Hey, I'm just getting started!" Gabriel cheered confidently, trying to stay optimistic. Lily hummed and rotated the roulette wheel. After a few seconds, she rolled the white pill. Both her and Team Free Will tracked the ball, serious expressions on their faces.

"No more bets, thank you." Lily said, as the ball fell on Red 3 which meant Gabriel lost again. His chips were then scooped up and thus leaving him with $1,500,000. Deciding to help, Lucifer placed a great amount of his own chips on Black 10. "Using teamwork, I see." Lily commented, whirling the roulette wheel. "Good." She said, rolling the ball. "No more bets, thank you." The ball spun and soon stopped on Black 11, thus leaving Lucifer with $2,500,000. Growling, Lucifer and Gabriel put their chips together and placed their bets on Red 23. But soon after the ball landed on Black 31.

"Cassie, help!" Gabriel whined as his and Lucifer's chips were scooped up. Rolling his eyes, Castiel placed a hefty amount of his chips on Red 18. Back and forth, the Angels placed their bets. Until there was nothing else to bet on. Nothing more to bet with.

"Oh shit." Gabriel gasped, stumbling back onto his feet and knocking his chair to the ground. "We're broke..." Gabriel gulped nervously, his eyes locked on the chip scooper as it came to throw them out.

"Wait!" Lucifer cried out, jumping to his feet and causing his chair to fly back. Swiftly, he ripped off his tie with purpose. "Excuse me, everyone," Lucifer announced, waving around his tie like a flag. "I know this may come off as rather blunt, but which one of you wants to buy this off me?" He asked, giving his audience a cute chuckle for good measure. There was a prolonged pause before a handful of people began to shout, fighting over which one would win the Archangel's tie.

"What are you doing?" Castiel asked warily, eyeing his older brother with curiosity.

"Using our resources." Lucifer replied. "It seems we have a winner." He said, giving his tie to a very lucky lady. "Have fun." Lucifer said, sparing the woman a wink and making her giggle. Turning back to the game, Lucifer placed the chips he received on Red 16.

"No more bets, thank you." Lily said, spinning the roulette wheel and then rolling the pill soon after. Gabriel and Lucifer passed each other a glance, before they turned back to their game, awaiting the results. The ball then slowed down and soon fell on Red 18, leaving Lucifer broke. Jumping into action, Gabriel removed his bowtie and suit jacket.

"Yo!" Gabriel called out, waving his article of clothing. "This might seem a little desperate, but I really need some help. Pretty please with a cherry on top?" Gabriel requested, batting his eyelashes sweetly and the crowd cheered happily. "How lovely." He said, laughing. "It seems to be anyone's game. So who will win?" Dozens of hands shot up in the air, either cash was clenched in their fists or chips were being thrown around careless, making Gabriel grin. "Eenie, meeny, miny, you!" Gabriel picked to a winner and curled his finger to beckon the unsuspecting frazzled man closer. "I hope you'll think of me, darling." Gabriel teased, making the man blush. Placing his earning chips on Black 8, Gabriel gave Lily a nod. Lily nodded back and gave the roulette wheel another whirl.

"No more bets, thank you." Lily said, rolling the ball expertly. It all happened so fast and Gabriel nearly choked as the ball fell on Black 20, once again leaving Gabriel broke. Quickly standing to his feet, Castiel's chair was knocked down. Surprisingly, Castiel wasted no time to take off his tie and waistcoat. "That's the spirit, Cas!" Dean cheered on his friend encouragingly. Castiel presented the crowd a tiny smile. That was all they needed before they started fighting over the Angel's clothes.

"You're quite the fighter." Castiel said, his eyes pinpointed on an innocent young man. "I have no need for these anymore." He said, passing the man his discharged clothing. "Maybe if you're lucky, you'll continue to win." Castiel said boldly, flashing the man a wink. Lucifer and Gabriel obviously felt proud of his bravery. Putting his chips on Black 13, Castiel glanced at Lily. She nodded and gave the wheel a trusty spin, before she rolled the white pill. It only took a few spins before the ball landed onto Red 5.

"Damn!" The Winchesters swore. Wasting no time, Lucifer threw off his suit coat and shirt. Earning more chips, Lucifer placed the chips on Red 30. Lily made the same motion: spin the wheel and rolled the ball. The pill fell on Black 17. Gabriel hurriedly removed his waistcoat, shirt, and shoes. All the same Castiel hurriedly tore of his shirt, shoes, and pants. The audience quickly showered them in the needed roulette chips and soon they both placed the chips on Red 21. Team Free Will watched Lily's movements closely and felt defeated when the ball fell on Red 27. Back and forth, the Angels kept removing their clothes. Until they were barely covered up.

"Come on!" Gabriel groaned as the ball fell on Red 9. Hesitating, Castiel and Lucifer disposed of their legwarmers and stockings. This left the Angels in only their boxers.

"Lucky number 7, it's all up to you!" Gabriel declared, slamming their chips on Red 7.

"Please win or we'll be naked!" Castiel pleaded, trying his best to cover himself while the crowd of men and women chanted shamelessly: "Take it off! Take it off!" The air grew intensely thick as the ball spun around the wheel, faster than the first several times. The Angels held their breathe, watching as the ball slowed down. Finally the ball fell on Red 7.

"Red 7..." Gabriel gasped, a grin spreading across his lips. "Red 7!"

"We won!" Lucifer cheered, pulling his brothers in a group hug. "We won 98 million dollars!" Suddenly the building began to shake and the money started being dispensed from the money suckers, until the floor was flooded with stacks of cash.

"Hey, what's that?" Sam suddenly asked, pointing to their feet. Following his finger, they saw a small rectangular Ghost hopping around helplessly. It seemed to be trying to escape.

"It looks like a Ghost." Castiel said, tilting his head. "But its so small..."

"Hey, I ain't complaining." Gabriel said with an indifferent shrug. "This day just keeps getting better and better." He said eagerly, slipping off his boxers. The audience went wild and continued to shower the Angels in money while Gabriel transformed his lingerie into Crotchless. "Might as well earn some Heaven Coins too." Stomping down on the Ghost, Gabriel closed his one eye and aimed. "Repent you motherfucker!" The gun was then fired off and the church bell rung in the distance.

* * *

"What an adventure." Gabriel said, grinning in satisfaction. Gabriel giggled as he continued to count their winnings. "I still can't believe we won!"

"Me neither. I surely thought we'd lose." Castiel admitted sheepishly. "I must also admit that the whole ordeal was actually rather fun." He confessed, laughing. "Even if we didn't get our clothes back..."

"Of course we wouldn't, considering our fanbase." Lucifer said with a small scoff.

"By the way, thank you for buying these charmeuse robes." Castiel said gratefully to Sam and Dean, proudly presenting his newly bought lingerie. The silk kimonos went to the end of their thighs and were their signature colors: gold, silver, and bronze. Sam and Dean simply chuckled sheepishly and waving the Angel off dismissively.

"It was nothing, really." The Winchesters said in perfect sync, reaching out and ruffling Castiel's already messy hair. This earned a wide smile from the Angel. Suddenly the elevator dinged and the doors opened, revealing an enraged Michael. He held Gabriel's laptop under his arm as he stomped into the living room. 

"Are you the ones responsible for this?" Michael asked through gritted teeth. Everyone blinked, confused. Michael growled and opened the laptop, punching in Gabriel's password and turning the computer towards the group of five. "Are you the ones responsible for this?!" Michael repeated angrily, pointing to the screen where eBay was displayed. Gabriel's boxers had been put up for auction and the price was steadily climbing.

"Yup." Gabriel answered bluntly. "Sick fucks will pay for anything nowadays." He said proudly, sounding like he was some expert. Michael hissed like a snake and effortlessly broke the laptop over his knee. "Michael, what the fuck?!" Gabriel yelled, motioning to the broken computer on the floor.

"Have you no shame?!" Michael raged, scolding his brothers.

"Oh, I _have_ shame, thank _you_ very much." Gabriel replied, slamming three stacks of cash on the coffee table in front of Michael. "By the way, you _so_ owe me a new laptop." He said, pushing the stacks of money further in Michael's direction. "Here you are." Gabriel said smugly. "Three million dollars. Just as you requested, Mikey."

"And we even have more left over." Castiel added, trying to calm Michael down. But Michael simply ignored him.

"I refuse to take any of your cum stained money." Michael hissed in disgust, his gaze pinpointed on Lucifer in particular.

"Assuming shit now, are we?" Lucifer inquired, jumping to his feet and standing in front of Michael. "Just so you know, Mikey, that cash was nowhere near my cock. So sorry to disappoint you, you dumb sick fuck." Lucifer growled, jabbing his older brother in the chest.

"I _will_ hurt you, Lucifer." Michael seethed, slapping younger brother's hand away. Lucifer gave the Archangel a slanted smirk and gave Michael another jab.

"And I _will_ crush you, Michael." Lucifer said confidently. "How 'bout we take this outside?" He suggested, nudging his head to the opened window. "We can even have an old fashion one-on-one. For old time sake." Lucifer added, and Michael pursed his lips in thought. "That is if you can handle it, big brother."

"Watch yourself, little brother." Michael warned, and Lucifer humorously held his hands up in surrender. "All out?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. Lucifer nodded. "Then what the hell are we standing around for? I have a score to settle with you."

"Aw, did I make you look like a fool?" Lucifer taunted, earning a low growl. "Save it for the fight, Mikey." And then the two Archangels disappeared with a smooth whoosh and a flutter of wings. Gabriel and Castiel sighed loudly, reluctantly standing to their feet.

"Sorry boys, you might have to wait here." Gabriel said apologetically. "We gotta go before they kill each other." He stated, rolling his eyes and blowing a raspberry. Afterwards he and Castiel disappeared with the same smooth whoosh and a flutter of wings. As soon as they were gone, Sam and Dean turned to one another and burst into laughter.

"Could you imagine?" Sam inquired through quiet giggles. "Having another brother?"

"All the time." Dean confessed, calming his laughter to a low chuckle. "Who knows. Maybe we do and we just don't know it." He said jokingly, earning a punch in the shoulder. "But if we did, do you think we'd fight like Lucifer and Michael?"

"Probably." Sam replied. "I mean, that's usually how family works. You fight, you make-up, and then you fight again. But when you aren't fighting, we'd just hang out and have fun. You stick together, ya'know?" He explained. "Plus, it'd be nice to have a little brother."

"Another little brother to torment." Dean said, snickering to himself. Sam playfully rolled his eyes.

"So, Lucifer?" Sam asked, quirking a curious brow and watching in amusement as Dean's cheeks turned pink. Which was rather unusual for Dean. After all, Sam had always known Dean to be quite the flirty romantic. Dean was always the one to make others blush at the mere sight of his smile, to make their knees weak at the sound of his laughter, to make them quiver at the sight of his bright green eyes, and to make them wish they had him all for themselves. But it looked as though Dean was the one floating. Although he didn't know if he was floating on Cloud Seven, Cloud Eight, or Cloud Nine. Dean blinked slowly and he wore a dazed expression, nodding in response to Sam's earlier question. "You like him, don't you?" Sam asked, pushing his luck, hoping he would get a straight answer out of his brother.

"I don't know right now..." Dean replied honestly. That wasn't the answer Sam was looking for, but he would take. "Although, if I did like him, could you blame me?" He asked rather cryptically, grabbing Sam's attention once again. "I mean, c'mon! Lucifer just has this...thing about him. He is just _so_ Alpha." Dean said rather dreamily. Sam chuckled with another playful roll of his eyes.

"You're telling me."


	9. The Demonic Romeo and The Angelic Juliet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ships and brotherly feels anyone?

Wintertime **[Nighttime]**  
Falls Park

Sunday. The unspoken Holy Day, where people go to church and sing the Holy Muses for the Big Man. However church is rather irrelevant to the Angels. Sunday mornings were spent cooped up at home and scrolling through Netflix. Sunday nights were spent at the park and playing a sly game of iSpy. Although it wasn't like _"I spy with my little eye something red."_ It was more like _"I spy with my little eye someone sweet."_ Sweet was their humorous uncreative code word for potential dates, curtesy of Gabriel. This was an easy game. A game that was often played by Lucifer and Gabriel, although they'd sometimes drag their siblings into playing along with them. The way of the game was easy: the players would take turns pointing out each sweetheart and then rating them with 1 being the lowest and 10 being the highest.

"I spy with my little eye someone sweet." Gabriel said, pointing to an unsuspecting man. The handsome man was young and quite charming from what they could tell. He even had a date with him, but the Archangels could tell she wasn't anything major to the man she had her arm around. But still, Lucifer shook his head. "No?" Gabriel asked, furrowing his brows. "What do you mean 'no'? I pointed out a good guy. Not great, but good! I'm sure he can show you a good time. Hell, that girl wrapped around his arm could show you a good time too, but here you are! I...I'm just having trouble understanding..." Gabriel babbled, his shoulders slouching in defeat.

"Sorry." Lucifer apologized, heaving a sigh through his nose. "In my own opinion, Gabe, you can do better." He said, shrugging halfheartedly.

"You've said that several times, Luci." Gabriel said, groaning unhappily as he draped himself on his older brother.

"I know, I know." Lucifer mumbled.

"What's wrong with us?" Gabriel asked quietly, snapping his and making two Chupa Chups Suckers appear in the palm of his hand. Cola-lemon Bubblegum and Strawberry-kiwi Bubblegum. "We used to love this game." He added, handing Lucifer the Cola-lemon lollipop.

"Thanks." Lucifer said gratefully. Now everyone knew that Lucifer wasn't partial to sweets, much like how Gabriel didn't favor spicy food. However there are times when they will make exceptions. And now, Lucifer was willing to make an exception. "And you're right ya'know." Lucifer said, getting back on track. "We used to love this game. Used to, as in past tense." He said, unwrapping the candy. "Unfortunately, I don't think I can answer your earlier question. I can't." Lucifer leaned against Gabriel, lollipop sticks clasped between their lips. "I can't." Lucifer repeated. "We can't."

"We?" Gabriel echoed. "What do you mean 'we'?" He asked. Lucifer didn't want to answer that unfortunate question and decided to find something else to talk about. Luckily, he found exactly that.

"Oh, look." Lucifer said, pointing upwards, quickly changing the subject. This made Gabriel upset. He hated being ignored. Nevertheless, Gabriel looked up to see Castiel flying overhead. "Looks like Cassie came to join in on the game." Lucifer said. "Hey Castiel." He greeted as Castiel landed in front of them.

"So this is where you two have been." Castiel said, smiling in relief. "I should've looked here first, but I wanted to make sure. I checked all your favorite places like Sweet Dreams, The Quiet Place, IHOP-"

"Lollipop." Gabriel grasped Castiel's hands and gave the Angel a wide smile. Castiel returned the smile upon hearing Gabriel's nickname for him. When it came to nicknames, they meant something to the Angels. Mikey, Luka, Pet, Babycakes, and Cherub were often used teasingly—whether jokingly loving or irritatingly mean. Mika, Luci, Raph, Gabe, and Cassie were often used teasingly sweet. Lollipop was new. "Calm down, will ya'? We're fine." Gabriel said, reassuring the little Angel. "Ya'know what? There's nothing for us here, so let's just go home." He suggested. Castiel nodded and made his wings disappear. Gabriel then stood up and hooked his right arm around Castiel's left. Lucifer smiled fondly at his brothers and followed suit, wrapping his right arm around Gabriel's left. The three Angels then started to leave the park, but then Castiel suddenly stopped.

"Why'd you stop?" Lucifer asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I just grew curious is all..." Castiel said, trailing off. Lucifer and Gabriel shared a confused look. Castiel blushed and pointed to whatever he was talking about. The Archangels followed Castiel's finger to see he was pointing towards a man talking on his cellphone. He was mature; he had short black hair and a scruffy beard to match, a fair complexion, and striking coco brown eyes. He wore a black tuxedo, a gray dress shirt underneath paired with a blood red tie, a pair of obsidian loafers, and a long black trenchcoat. Lucifer and Gabriel shared another look, wondering why Castiel felt the need to point out this stranger. He wasn't of any importance to them.

"He seems a bit too stiff for my taste." Lucifer joked, waving his free hand dismissively.

"And here I thought that's how you liked 'em." Gabriel joked back. "Whatcha say, Cassie?" He asked, turning to his baby brother, only to be surprised upon seeing Castiel was gone. "Hey, where'd Castiel? He was just here two seconds ago."

"Gabriel." The little Archangel hummed in acknowledgement. "I found him." Lucifer said, grasping Gabriel's chin and turning him to face the direction Castiel went.

"No way..." Gabriel chuckled, watching as Castiel trudged towards the mysterious man with such nervousness. "That's my brother!" Gabriel cheered happily and proudly, shaking Lucifer with pure excitement. But Lucifer wasn't responding. Instead a dull clack was heard and Gabriel almost stumbled when he only felt air. Glancing down, Gabriel saw it was the Cola-lemon sucker. "Luci?" Meanwhile Castiel was weighing his options. 'What am I doing?' Castiel thought as he kept walking towards the mysterious man. 'Maybe I should-' But then he stopped himself. For some odd reason, he wanted to go talk to this man. He just had to. Straightening himself up, Castiel continued to walk with a confident stride. Well, as confident as an awkward Angel could be.

"Hello." Castiel suddenly snapped back into reality—although he didn't know what he had dozed off in the first place—and realized he was standing in front of the handsome stranger.

"H-hello." Castiel greeted back, stuttering a little.

"How may I help you?" The man asked, amusement hinted in his voice.

"I," Castiel thought for a moment. What did he want? "I don't know actually." Castiel confessed, blushing in embarrassment.

"It appears the cat has got your tongue, huh poppet?" The man joked teasingly. Castiel merely tilted his head in response, giving the man his signature confused puppy expression.

"Why would a cat have my tongue?" Castiel asked, not entirely understanding. This made the man laugh, causing Castiel's blush to worsen. "Have I said something humorous?" He asked quietly, twiddling his thumbs shyly.

"No, not at all." The man replied, shaking his head. "And it's an expression, by the way." He added, and Castiel nodded curtly in understanding. "Now, care to give me your name?" He asked. Castiel gave a small laugh and shook his head playfully. "And why not, hm?"

"Shouldn't a gentleman give his first?" Castiel asked, earning a raised brow. The corners of Castiel's lips twitched and he had long stopped fiddling with his thumbs. Once again he felt confidence coursing through him.

"How bold of you." The man said, earning a gummy smile. "Crowley MacLeod."

"Castiel Anarchy."

* * *

Springtime **[Afternoon]**  
The Angels' Residence **[Castiel's bedroom]**

"I gotta ask, Cassie, why a spring date?" Gabriel's whiskey eyes tracked every one of Castiel's movements as the little Angel practically flew around his bedroom in a small panic. "I mean, yeah, April is great. It's 2018. The perfect time to go out on a date. That is if you enjoy chilly weather." Gabriel said playfully, leaning against the doorway of Castiel's room while the Angel worked.

"Is there something you want, Gabriel?" Castiel asked, rummaging through his closet with something date appropriate. This was his first date, meaning Castiel had no idea what he was doing. He watched movies about these types of things, but those were just movies. He still didn't know the proper things to say on a first date, much less what to wear on one.

"I'm having trouble processing all this." Gabriel said, shrugging lazily.

"What do you mean?"

"Like, who is this dude?" Gabriel asked. "What's his name?"

"Crowley." Castiel answered. "Now please, I need to get ready."

"You've been getting ready for a whole hour. I'm surprised you aren't already late." Gabriel said jokingly.

"Gabriel, please." Castiel groaned unhappily and ungracefully plopped on the floor of his closet. "I only have formal attire. I need assistance."

"I was wondering when you were going to ask." Gabriel said, walking into the messy bedroom and helping his brother off the ground. "Look at you. Still dressed in your pajamas." He commented, gesturing to the defeated Seraph. "But don't you worry because I'm here to help, Lollipop." Gabriel said, ruffling Castiel's hair. He then turned around and began to pick up the deserted clothes from off the floor, looking for an outfit for his baby brother.

"Lollipop." Castiel spoke up, and Gabriel hummed in acknowledgement. "Lollipop. That's new." Castiel said. "Does it mean something?"

"Should it?"

"It must if you're using it." Castiel said. "You're not using it in your usual 'family loving' manner, but rather to comfort and reassure me."

"Looks like you answered your own question." Gabriel said, turning to Castiel and presenting him an outfit. "Here, put this on." He instructed. Castiel nodded, taking the clothes and shedding his sleepwear before quickly trading them for the attire he was given: an ocean blue button-down, midnight black pants, and an old pair of true blue sneakers Castiel forgot he had. Castiel went to tuck in his shirt, but Gabriel slapped his hands. "No." The Archangel tutted. "Remember this, little brother." Gabriel fixed the collar of the shirt and rolled the sleeves up to Castiel's elbows. "This is a casual date. Not a board meeting."

"Alright." Castiel said, making note of that.

"I still can't believe this is your first ever date." Gabriel murmured, reaching up to fix the unusually disastrous black locks and ruffling them to recreate Castiel's usual bedhead look. "I mean, you've been talking to this Crowley guy for six months."

"I was confused on whether I should make the first move or him. I couldn't very well ask him over for Christmas and he was busy on New Years. And there were too many snowstorms..." Castiel explained rather sheepishly.

"Hey, I ain't judging." Gabriel then stepped back and observed his work. "You're gonna knock him dead." He said, feeling pride bubble up within him. "My baby brother. Going on a date. I can't believe it."

"Well believe it." Castiel replied, making Gabriel laugh. "Thank you, Gabriel. Now, I have to go. Wouldn't want to be late." With that Castiel grabbed his winter jacket, waved to his brother, and disappeared with a flutter of wings.

"Good luck." Swiftly turning around, Gabriel saw Lucifer standing in the doorway. A box of S'mores Oreos in his hands and a frown etched on his face.

"Are those my Oreos?" Gabriel asked, pointing to the half empty box of cookies. Lucifer shrugged carelessly. "Please don't do this again." Gabriel said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I need these." Lucifer retorted, earning a sharp sarcastic chuckle.

"For what?" Gabriel asked, crossing his arms over his chest. "Don't tell me you're pregnant, Luka." He joked halfheartedly.

"Oh, yeah, ha ha. Good one, Babycakes." Lucifer remarked, rolling his eyes.

"So, you gonna tell me why you're down in the dumps?" Gabriel asked, cocking a brow. Lucifer huffed and shook his head. But Gabriel wasn't having it. With a tsk, Gabriel held up his hand. Flexing his fingers and positioning them as if he was about to snap. Rolling his eyes once again, Lucifer decided to let up.

"Crowley." He said. But Gabriel just shook his head, not understanding what Lucifer was getting at. "Crowley!" Lucifer repeated, but Gabriel still didn't understand. "I know I've heard his name before."

"And?"

"And I don't trust him." Lucifer said, removing his grip on the box and letting it float there in the air. "I don't know about you, but I don't want him anywhere near Castiel."

"Don't do this." Gabriel requested, shaking his head. Lucifer scoffed and averted his gaze. "Lucifer, don't you do this!" Gabriel repeated, speaking much louder. Almost yelling.

"Don't do what?" Lucifer asked coyly.

"Don't you ruin this for Castiel." Gabriel growled, earning a dry laugh.

"Why shouldn't I?" Lucifer asked. "Don't you get it? That puppy of man is going to hurt him!"

"How would you know?!" Gabriel yelled, clenching his fists.

"I don't!" Lucifer admitted. "But I'm not gonna sit here and wait." He declared. And before Gabriel could move, Lucifer was gone. As he disappeared the Oreos suddenly dropped. Luckily for Gabriel, he was able to catch the box before the cookies scattered everywhere. Gabriel sighed and set the box of cookies on top of the dresser before sitting on the edge of Castiel's bed. His eyes fluttered close and he let his head fall into the palms of his hands.

"The only one that's going to hurt him is you..."

Meanwhile  
Castiel's P.O.V

"Where are you taking me?" I asked, trying to peek over the blindfold Crowley had tied around my eyes.

"Ah, ah." Crowley pushed my fingers away from the blindfold. "Wouldn't want to spoil the surprise." Crowley said. I hummed skeptically, but I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. A surprise? I then perked up upon hearing a door open and a bell ring. Were we in a store? "Wait right here." Crowley told me, and I nodded. I heard him walk away, but I knew he wasn't too far. I heard him talking to someone. Whispering. I couldn't exactly hear what they were saying, which made me all-the-more skeptical. But then Crowley returned to my side, clasping his hand in mine. "Right this way, darling." Crowley said, and began to lead me somewhere else. We turned a corner where we stopped off about two seconds before we continued. Another door was opened and I was immediately greeted by a wave of cool air. It was almost freezing. Crowley led me down a flight a stairs, holding my hand tight as to reassure me I wouldn't fall. Once my feet had touched the ground, Crowley untied the blindfold. "Surprise." Crowley said, stepping aside to present me an empty ice rink. It was covered in blue and red fairy lights with music playing softly in the background.

"How'd you manage to pull this off?" I asked, looking over my shoulder. Crowley shrugged and held out a fresh pair of Aegean blue figure skates to me.

"Skate for me." Crowley requested. I stared down at the figure skates, feeling a tiny smile etch itself on my lips. I used to be a bubbling fool when it came to skating. Whether it was on land or on ice, I was never able to skate as flawless as my brothers. But months and months of practiced had fixed that little detail. Taking hold of the skates, I gave Crowley a confident nod. I walked towards a bench and sat down, removing my sneakers in favor for the ice skates. Standing, I pushed myself onto the ice. The first steps were always wobbly, which earned a loud chuckle from the man. But I didn't mind. I skated a full circle around the rink and I felt myself getting back into the swing of things. It was like gliding on air to me. I made my way to the middle of the rink, stretching my arms over my head and then slipping them down my sides before letting them fall to my thighs. I had let myself slip, making smooth figure eights and spirals while my hands glided over my body. However I remembered I wasn't alone and turned my focus back to my date, who was happily recording me. I blushed in embarrassment and instinctively slapped my hands on my reddened cheeks. "No need to feel so bashful, darling." Crowley said, giving me a playful wave. I huffed and skated towards him, reaching out so my hands grasped the rail.

"Skate with me." I said hopefully, sticking out my hand. Crowley shook his head, trying push my hand away. But I grasped his own and interlocked our fingers. "Ah, ah." I snapped my fingers and laughed upon seeing Crowley wobbling, knowing that he himself had a pair of figure skates on. "Wouldn't want to deny me of my first dance, would you?" I teased, leading Crowley onto the ice. I then took Crowley's phone and suddenly removed my grip, letting the device float there. I wasn't afraid of using my powers around Crowley, but only because I told him that I was a Warlock. God forbid he find out the truth. "Now you won't miss a single moment." I said, loosening my grasp on Crowley's hand. However he was quick and tightened his grip on me. I laughed which earned a scoff from the man.

"Enjoying yourself?" Crowley asked in a faux grumpy tone, and I nodded. "Good." He said, a smile stitching itself on his lips to reveal the grumpy expression.

"Crowley." I said, earning a hum in question. "Thank you."

* * *

The next afternoon  
The Angels' Residence **[Gabriel's bedroom]**  
Third person's P.O.V

That late morning and afternoon for Gabriel was spent looking through his Heavenly Sweets catalog. Excited hums and delightful purrs escaping the Archangel as he flipped through the magazine. Tiramisu, Profiterole, and Meringue. Oh my! Gabriel was so proud of himself for snagging that catalog before he and Lucifer left Heaven.

"Dad have mercy, I think I'm about to have a sugargasm!"

"Mind holding it?" Gabriel couldn't help but shriek in fear and shock, rolling off his bed and landing smackdab on the ground. "Whoops..."

"Lucifer, what the fuck?!" Gabriel screamed, springing to his feet and giving Lucifer a nasty glare.

"Stuff it, will ya'? I gotta show ya' something." Lucifer said, tossing a couple of polaroid pictures on Gabriel's bed. The young Archangel huffed and plopped himself on his bed, taking the pictures and observing them. His bad mood immediately disappeared.

"What the fuck?" Gabriel dropped the pictures and snapped his focus to once again glare at his brother. "You stalked them?!"

"Duh." Lucifer replied bluntly.

"Are you mental?!" Gabriel yelled, snatching up the pictures and throwing them at Lucifer's chest. "What if he caught you? What then? What would you say to him then, Lucifer?" He questioned, his anger turning into concern. "Lucifer, I'm worried about you. What aren't you telling me?"

"I-" Suddenly Lucifer's phone rung. Excusing himself, Lucifer answered the call. "Hello?"

_"Hello Lucifer."_ Raphael greeted, her voice stern and assertive.

"Hey Raph." Lucifer greeted back, combing his hand through his hair. "You got anything on this Crowley guy?" He asked, and Raphael hummed, no doubt nodding as well.

_"My Intel has finally gotten back to me and it seems they've figured out who this Crowley man really is."_ Raphael stated, and she didn't sound all too happy.

"Who he really is?" Lucifer repeated. "What do you mean by that?" He asked, wanting a straight answer.

_"His name used to be Fergus Roderick McLeod. A man who lived during 1661 in Scotland."_

"Used to be?" Lucifer asked curiously and in bafflement. "And did you say 1661?"

_"I did."_ Raphael replied. _"Crowley is a Demon, Lucifer."_ She said, causing Lucifer's heart to sputter. _"He used to be the King of Hell, but I won't go into too much detail about th-"_

"They're dating." Lucifer blurted out, cutting Raphael off.

_"Excuse me?"_

"Castiel is dating him..." Lucifer breathed out, biting his lip nervously.

_"Stop him."_ Raphael commanded. _"Do not let him out of your sight. He must stay away from Crowley."_

"I'll try." Lucifer said. "Thank you, Raphael." With that, Lucifer ended the call before peeking his head inside Gabriel's room. "Where's Castiel?" Lucifer asked hurriedly. Gabriel gave his older brother a strange look. "Gabriel, please, this is important." He said. Gabriel continued to give Lucifer a strange look, but decided to let up.

"Castiel went to have brunch with Crowley, down at the café called Jitters." Gabriel stated. "But I don't think they're there anymore."

"Then where else would they be?" Lucifer asked impatiently.

"Maybe you should try Falls Park or that biking trail." Gabriel said. Lucifer nodded his head in thanks and went to leave, when Gabriel called out for him. He looked worried. "Lucifer, what's wrong?"

"I gotta go."

"Lucifer." Gabriel sighed and climbed out of bed, reaching towards his older brother. But Lucifer just gave him a slanted apologetic smile before he disappeared. "Lucifer!"

That early evening  
Sioux Falls Bike Trails

The sound of laughter cut through the crisp night air as Castiel and Crowley strolled along the quiet hiking trail. Their fingers entwined and their hands swinging between them as they chatted amongst themselves. Castiel never remembered laughing so hard and smiling so much. Back and forth they told each other past stories. Crowley told Castiel about his mother, Rowena. How she was a Witch and quite the vexing snapdragon—a teasingly mean yet loving nickname he gave her. Castiel told Crowley about how his eldest brother taught him how to dance—such as pole dancing for starters and then leading to other genres of dance that the Archangels were taught by Amara. Although he never told Crowley why—so it technically wasn't a lie. Everything was going perfect until Castiel received a call. Quickly apologizing, Castiel answered the call.

"Hello, this is Castiel Anarchy speaking." Castiel spoke. "How may I help you?"

_"Castiel."_ Lucifer spoke sternly. _"Castiel, I need you to come home."_

"Lucifer?" Castiel inquired, confused. Lucifer sighed heavily.

_"Yes, it's me."_ He replied. _"Listen Castiel, I need you to come home now."_

"Why?" Castiel asked. "What's wrong? Is something happening?" He questioned, his curiosity turning into worry.

_"What?"_ Lucifer laughed, causing Castiel's worry to turn into confusion. _"No. Nothing is happening, unless you count Gabriel masturbating over that damn sweets catalog of his."_ Lucifer joked, although his tone wasn't playful. _"Anyway, why would you assume something is wrong?"_

"Because you commanded that I come home without an explanation." Castiel said, his confusion long turning into annoyance. "If making me panic was the point of this call, then you've succeeded. I'm still on a date, so I have to-"

_"Does he know?"_ Lucifer interrupted, peaking Castiel's interest. 'I don't understand. What exactly is Lucifer trying to get at?' Castiel thought. But for some reason, Castiel swore he knew exactly what his older brother was talking about.

"Pardon?"

_"I said, does he know?"_ Lucifer repeated himself. _"Does Crowley know you're an Angel?"_ He asked. This question caught Castiel off guard. The Angel stopped walking, causing his hand to slip from Crowley's grasp. Crowley paused and turned to Castiel, his eyebrows furrowing upon seeing the saddened expression stitched on Castiel's face. _"He doesn't, does he?"_

"I don't think that's any of your business." Castiel said quietly, ignoring the look Crowley was giving him. Lucifer sighed heavily.

_"...Castiel, please know I'm doing this to protect you."_ Lucifer said, trying to reason with his brother. But Castiel just shook his head, even though Lucifer couldn't see him.

"Goodbye Lucifer."

_"Wait, no, Cas-"_ But Castiel hung up before Lucifer could finish his sentence. Castiel bit down on his lip and pocketed his phone. No matter how much he tried to deny it, Castiel knew that Lucifer was right. What would Crowley do if he knew that Castiel was an Angel of the Lord? He wouldn't know unless he found out...

"Crowley," Castiel started, grabbing Crowley's attention. "I have to tell you something." He said quietly, twiddling his thumbs. "I've known you since November and we've officially started dating yesterday. But I feel like I should be truthful with you before we go any further." Taking in a deep breathe, Castiel prepared himself for the worst. "I'm an Angel." Castiel confessed.

"I know." Crowley replied bluntly, almost immediately. Castiel's eyes widened in surprise. "Don't look so shocked." Crowley said, amusement in his eyes. "I didn't really think you were a Warlock. If you were I would've already knew your name." Crowley explained. Thanks to Rowena And her teachings, he knew every Witch and Warlock. "And it wasn't that hard to piece things together. You live in a church, Feathers." He added jokingly. Castiel huffed and let himself feel at ease. "Now I have something to tell you." Crowley said. "I'm a Demon. The former King of Hell." He confessed. To his own surprise, Castiel's expression softened. He honestly didn't expect that. He expected a tantrum or a meltdown. Hell, he thought the Angel would smite him. But Castiel just smiled.

"What now?" Castiel asked curiously, sniffling quietly.

"Now I leave." Crowley replied.

"Or we both do." Castiel suggested, and Crowley asked what he meant. "If you're leaving, so am I." Castiel decided, wiping away the tears that had fallen.

"Castiel-"

"My mind is made up." Castiel declared, wrapping his arms around Crowley's neck. "Besides, I need you." Castiel added. "Everything that I've did so far was because of you. I haven't smiled or laughed this much in forever." He said, chuckling softly to himself. "No one has ever held me in such a nonplatonic manner. No one took me out on a date. And no one made me this happy before. Not like this." Castiel said. "I would turn my back on Heaven for you." He promised. "What I think I'm trying to say is-" Before Castiel could finish, Crowley wrapped an arm around Castiel's waist and tangled his hand in the Angel's tousled locks.

"I know what you're going to say." Crowley said, giving his Angel a smile. "I think you know what I'm going to say too."

"I think so." Castiel said softly, nodding. "But I want to hear you say it."

"I can do that." Crowley said, chuckling. "I love you too." And so, they sealed it all with a kiss.

* * *

That very night the couple decided to meet up at Falls Park where they first met. They had planned to run away together, but they didn't know where yet. And so there Crowley was, standing at the edge of the waterfall waiting for his beloved Angel. He was in deep thought until the sound of footsteps alerted him. Snapping back into reality, Crowley upon seeing Castiel standing just a foot away. He was wearing the same attire he wore on their first date; but something was off. His true blue eyes were void of the usual glow and lovesick gaze. 

"Hello love." Crowley greeted, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. But he couldn't. Castiel hadn't said a word. He didn't even wave, which made Crowley feel all-the-more skeptical. "Are you alright?" He asked, his smile slowly faltering.

"Actually," Those warm true blue eyes turned into unfamiliar cold celestial blue eyes in mere seconds. "I'm not." Crowley watched as his beloved Angel morphed into a stranger. Lucifer. "Don't look like you didn't expect this to happen. I heard your little conversation with Castiel. And eloping? Really? That's your best option?" Lucifer ranted, lifting his pants leg and taking off his stocking. "Seriously?" He scoffed, shifting his stocking into his scythe Hellfire. "I knew you were bad news, but I didn't think you were stupid. Thinking I wouldn't know about your little plan and all." Lucifer said, pointing his blade at the Demon.

"And who the bloody hell are you?" Crowley said, glaring at the Archangel.

"You don't recognize me?" Lucifer asked, sounding rather offended. "I'm surprised Castiel never mentioned me. But I'll tell ya'. My name is Lucifer Anarchy, the Archangel. Embodiment of Lust, God's favorite, and Castiel's big brother." He stated, introducing himself with pride. "Castiel isn't going anywhere with you." He added. "Now say your prayers."

"Get away from him!" Lucifer's focus immediately darted behind him just in time to see a suitcase flying in his direction. Scurrying out the way, Lucifer managed to dodge the case. As the suitcase hit the rough ground, it exploded and caused the clothes inside to burst. This clouded Lucifer's vision for a couple seconds before the clothes fluttered to the ground or fell straight into the water. And there Castiel stood, standing between Crowley with his sword Diaphanous. "You really are a backstabbing whore." Castiel hissed, panting as he tried to catch his breathe.

"Such unusual rude words from such a sweet Angel."

"I can't believe you." Castiel mumbled, but Lucifer still heard him.

" _You_ can't believe _me_?" Lucifer asked, baffled and amused. "You're planning on running away with this fucking dog and you're awestruck?"

"You tried to kill him!" Castiel argued in protest. "Gabriel told me exactly what you were planning and I had to fly all the way here just to stop you!"

"I'm trying to help you! I know what's best for you and he is not what's best for you." Lucifer said, trying to get Castiel to see it his way. But Castiel just shook his head.

"Well I love him." Castiel stated calmly. Lucifer growled and tightened his grip on his scythe.

"You love him?" Lucifer inquired. "You don't know anything about love!"

"And how would you know what love is?!" Lucifer's eyes had widened. What was Lucifer supposed to say? How was he supposed to come back from that? He truly didn't know anything about love. Or at least he though he didn't... "If you wish to kill him, fine. But you're going to have to go through me." Castiel got into a fighting stance and gave his brother a warning glare, daring Lucifer to do something. Lucifer almost considered it. He really did. If it meant getting rid of this puppy dog of a man then Lucifer was willing to hurt his sweet baby brother. But then...

"Castiel," Crowley finally spoke up, grabbing the Angels' attention. "I can't take you with me." He said shamefully. Castiel spun around, his eyes widened in disbelief and hurt.

"What?" Castiel asked stupidly, stumbling towards the Demon. "Why?"

"Feathers," Crowley sighed, reaching out and cupping Castiel's cheeks. Castiel dropped his katana and instinctively wrapped his hand around Crowley's wrists. "I'm being hunted down as we speak. Until things blow over, I can't be with you. I shouldn't even be here."

"Demons?" Castiel asked, and Crowley nodded sadly. "Angel trumps Demon. I'm stronger." He said, trying to negotiate with the Demon. But Crowley kept shaking his head, telling him not to do anything stupid. "Crowley, I can protect you-"

"I won't let you put yourself in danger." Crowley said sternly, narrowing his eyes at the Angel. This shut Castiel up. "But when I return," Crowley started, his gaze softening. "I wish to take you on that third date." He said, before snapping his fingers. Castiel pulled away from Crowley and watched curiously as his beloved Demon took out a folded coat. Crowley handed the folded coat to Castiel, who took the gift and carefully unfolded it to reveal a long tan trenchcoat. "For you." Crowley said, snapping his fingers to rid Castiel of his winter jacket. "It fits you quite nicely." He added, helping Castiel put on his new trenchcoat. "Maybe when I return we can talk about spending the rest of our lives together." Crowley suggested, and Castiel nodded happily.

"Yes." Castiel answered immediately, true blue eyes shimmering with happy tears and hope.

"No." Lucifer said, but the happy couple weren't listening. He began stomping towards them and raised his weapon, but before he knew it he was being held back by a pair of strong arms.

"Stop it." The person demanded. Dean.

"The fuck are you doing?!" Lucifer screamed, breaking free from Dean's hold. But Dean quickly grabbed onto Lucifer's wrist, catching him off guard and causing him to drop the scythe. "Dean, get off me or I swear-"

"Lucifer, stop it." Dean demanded sternly, and Lucifer just suddenly froze. "Look at them." He said, pointing to the Angel and the Demon. Lucifer shook his head. "I said, look at them!" Dean commanded loudly. Lucifer bit the inside of his cheek and reluctantly began to follow directions. Lucifer stared as Castiel and Crowley talked quietly amongst themselves. Watching how casual Castiel was acting. Watching how loving Crowley was treating the Angel. Watching how they managed to turn this sad encounter into something playful. "Please, Lucifer, just let them have this."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I'm a monster, I know. But who said Crowley was never coming back? I assure you he'll be back really soon, my birdies.
> 
> And so Crowley has arrived. You might notice that he and Castiel are acting like one of those "quick to be an item couple". Not entirely true, but it might seem that way because of the time skips. In my opinion, I adore their relationship.
> 
> So now you've met Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Castiel, Chuck, Amara, Donatello, Sam, Dean, Jess, Brady, Ruby, Lilith, and Jervis. Now we have Crowley. Who else shall we meet as this adventure continues?


	10. Game, Set, and Match

Two months had passed since Crowley had to leave Castiel behind, but Castiel recovered from his heartbreaking goodbye quicker than everyone thought. Why, you may ask? Well, because Crowley didn't _just_ give Castiel a trenchcoat. Hidden into the left pocket was a piece of scrap paper with a number written on it. The number belonged to a burner phone that Crowley owned. When Castiel called, Crowley picked up almost immediately. He then explained to Castiel that he would only keep the burner phone for two weeks and then get rid of it before the assassins caught on. He would then call Castiel after he got another burner phone, but he specifically told Castiel not to save any of the numbers. That's how they've been operating, which made Castiel happy. And a happy Castiel meant a happy team. But enough about that. You must be wondering what time it is. Summertime, of course! Which means time to party and pig out! Unfortunately, the Angels had to protect Sioux Falls which meant no summer vacation for them. Except it was. You see, nothing was happening. So Dean and Sam took that as a sign.

"Everyone, pack your shit." Dean demanded, clapping loudly to grab the Angels' attention.

"Why?" Castiel asked, tilting his head.

"What do you mean why?" Dean asked, laughing. "As the protectors of Sioux Falls, you deserve a vacation."

"Oh yeah?" Gabriel asked, cocking an eyebrow. Sam and Dean nodded. With a thoughtful hum, Gabriel finally nodded. "I'm in." He said, without another thought. "Where are we going?"

"We're going with a friend." Sam stated.

"Does this friend have a name?" Lucifer asked curiously.

"His name is Garth." Dean informed. "Garth is a weird guy. But he's great too."

"Where is this 'Garth' taking us?" Michael asked, arching an eyebrow. If he and his family was going on vacation, he wanted to know all the details. He not only wanted to know who was taking them but where they were going.

"Los Angeles."

"California?!" Lucifer and Gabriel asked in disbelief, cheering with excitement sparkling in their eyes. The Winchesters nodded, humored smiles painted on their faces. Suddenly the two Archangels disappeared with a smooth whoosh and a quick flutter of wings. Their minds were made up.

"I guess I should start packing." Michael said, standing to his feet. Before he could move however, Lucifer appeared once again. A duffle strapped over his shoulder and another in his arms.

"Already covered." Lucifer said, shoving the second duffle bag into Michael's arms.

"Well, I suppose I should call Crowley and see if he's available." Castiel said, scratching his cheek with the nail of his index. An old habit that he never quite got rid of. Before he could even stand, Gabriel appeared right besides him. And just like Lucifer, he had a duffle strapped over shoulder and another in his hands. Not only that, but he also had Castiel's cellphone.

"I did that for you, Cassie." Gabriel said, tossing Castiel's phone back. "He happily agreed, so it would be best to make this day worth it." He added, pushing the spare bag into Castiel's lap.

"The coolers are in the trunk of Transparent and the GPS is ready."

"Here's the seating list." Gabriel said, handing Dean a piece of parchment paper. Dean observed the list as Sam looked over his shoulder to see what was what.

**Transparent** **:**  
Driver: Dean  
Shotgun: Gabriel  
Backseat: Castiel

 

**Baby :  
**Driver: Lucifer  
Shotgun: Sam  
Backseat: Michael

"Now, I suggest we go meet your friend Garth. It's basically a two-way trip." Lucifer said, throwing Dean the keys to Transparent. Luckily Dean reacted quickly and caught the keys without flinching. Dean huffed out a chuckle and tossed Lucifer the keys to Baby.

"Wheels up, boys." Michael said, slinging the duffle bag over his shoulder. "Next stop, California." Gabriel and Lucifer cheered once again, before they raced towards the elevator with silly grins on the faces. As the elevator arrived and everyone crammed themselves in, they started to sing joyfully.

_"California, show me love, get buzzed, let's get fucked up! California, throw it up, get buzzed, let's get fucked up!"_

_"California, show me love, get buzzed, let's get fucked up! California, so high, we'll ride all night!"_

The next two days  
Santa Monica Beach

Turns out Garth was a rather goofy guy. Garth Fitzgerald IV was his full name. He used to go to dental school, but later on decided that's not what he wanted to do with his life. So he dropped out and decided to go to veterinary school. He even takes online college. Tagging along with the comedian was his wife, Bess Fitzgerald. Yeah, wife. The silly country boy explained that he and Bess were childhood sweethearts and that their parents arranged them to be married. They officially became husband and wife when Garth was 23 and Bess was 18. It was the sweetest thing Castiel had ever heard.  _Now, where were we in the story? Oh yeah, the beach!_ Fun story actually: nobody owned a swimsuit. So they had a trip to Target. Crowley picked out navy boardshorts. Sam picked out crimson swim trunks. Castiel picked out midnight black and violet striped jammers. Michael picked out a maroon speedo. Garth picked out an ash gray and white striped rash guard. Dean picked out orange square-cut swim shorts. Gabriel picked out wine purple swim trunks. Lucifer picked out forest green boardshorts. And Bess picked out a sunflower one-piece swimsuit with a multicolored open-knit coverup hoodie. Afterwards, everyone headed for the beach. When Team Free Will, Crowley, and the adorkable couple arrived at the beach, they all weren't surprised to see it was packed. They were surprised however when they were bombarded by dozens and dozens of fans.

"If I knew you guys were famous, I would've scheduled a trip to a private resort." Garth said, laughing sheepishly.

"I've never met celebrities before." Bess mumbled to herself in awe, watching as the Angels were showered with gifts and appreciation.

"Trust me, being in the limelight isn't all it's cracked up to be." Michael insisted, his eyes gliding over the people that surrounded them.

"I think this is nice." Lucifer said, gesturing to their adoring fans.

"I second that." Gabriel agreed, taking another bite of his banana split. Which was obviously a gift from one of his adoring fans. The classic Neapolitan dessert was topped with chocolate syrup, raspberry sauce, caramel sauce, dozens of chocolate chips, plenty of seedless cherries, and whipped cream. He could get used to this.

"I never thought I'd be waited on hand and foot." Lucifer said, sipping on his tropical drink. A Painkiller. It was considered a feminine drink, but fuck it. A drink was a drink. "What do you think, Cassie?"

"I don't know." Castiel confessed quietly. "I didn't even know I had fans." He said, blushing under the eyes of all his admirers.

"I'll burn them all to a crisp if they try to touch you." Crowley interjected, making Castiel laugh.

"Jealous now, are we?" Castiel teased, earning a grumpy tsk in response, which once again made him laugh.

"You four are just so sickeningly sweet." Gabriel said to the couples, playfully rolling his eyes. Suddenly the familiar sound of a grand entrance was heard and a black limo SUV pulled up besides Garth's Ford Ranchero. It only parked there for a moment before it pulled off, leaving a large cloud of dust and sand in its wake. Raising his hand, Castiel swiped his arm through the air to blow the dirt and sand aside before everyone was blinded. Sadly, the Angels' gifts weren't so lucky. With a hiss, Lucifer snapped the ruined gifts away with distaste. Ruby and Lilith were here now; Ruby wore a black deep V-plunge neck strappy monokini paired with thick gold anklets and bracelets. Lilith sported a black cross front bandage swimsuit coupled with thick silver anklets and bracelets. Yup, definitely the Queens of BDSM. Ruby and Lilith strutted down their sparkly red carpet, when they finally noticed Team Free Will.

"Look sister, it seems to be those rats that blew up the school." Lilith said, pointing towards the Anarchy Brothers and the Winchesters.

"It appears so." Ruby replied, her eyes surprisingly pinpointed on Sam. Gabriel and Dean growled protectively, standing in front of Sam like guard dogs.

"And look, Crowley is here as well." Lilith said, causing the Demon to squirm as Lilith's eyes turned white. "The Queen will be delighted to know we finally found him."

"Knock it off." Castiel hissed, his eyes glowing blue as he gnashed his teeth possessively. Ruby and Lilith scoffed in response to the threat.

"What the fuck are you two doing here?" Lucifer grumbled, glaring fiercely at the Malum Sisters. Lilith let out a stubborn huff, her eyes flickering back to their usual blue-gray.

"We were going to ask you buffoons the same thing." Lilith said, taking out a document of some sort. A deed to be exact. "Were you not notified? This beach belongs to us." She explained, pointing to their signatures at the bottom of the deed. "We have the legal documents signed by the mayor of Sioux Falls herself."

"Yeah right." Gabriel replied, rolling his eyes irritably before snapping his fingers and thus setting the deed aflame. Lilith screamed in fear and she hurriedly dropped the flaming document as it burned to mere ashes. "There. No papers, no ownership."

"What is wrong with you?!" Lilith shrieked, both angry and frightened. Ruby shushed her softly and tried her best to calm down the young Demon. It wasn't working. "No civilized person would ever rebel against such legal restrictions! Why is it that following simple rules is so difficult for you?! Is it that you do not understand? Are we speaking too fast for you ignoramuses?!" Lilith screamed in frustration. Lucifer scoffed and flipped to his feet, standing in front of the Demons with glowing red eyes. "Go on, prove me right!" Lilith seethed, her eyes flickering white once more.

"Shut your fucking mouth!" Lucifer demanded, butting heads with the younger Demon. "If you want us gone, then do something about it. Don't just stand around bitchin'." He challenged. Lilith gave an animalist growl, but soon calmed down, remembering that she was here on vacation with Ruby.

"I rather not." Lilith said calmly, stepping back from the Archangel.

"Yes. Why fight when we can settle this disagreement differently?" Ruby inquired as a suggestion, stepping in to assist her dear sister.

"How so?" Castiel asked, tilting his head. He was interested.

"A game."

* * *

"Point one goes to Demons!" Garth announced, loudly blowing his metal pea whistle and waving an ink black flag to signal the Demons had won the first point.

"Volleyball? Seriously." Lucifer complained.

"This game presents a challenge of both endurance and gracefulness." Ruby stated proudly, spinning the volleyball on the tip of her index and middle fingers.

"Although now it seems unfair given your common looks and chemically unbalanced personalities." Lilith said with a cackle. Spiking the ball, Ruby went in to end the match. Quickly Lucifer dove for the ball, passing it to Gabriel. The young Archangel clasped his hands together and bopped the ball, giving it more bounce.

"Lucifer!" Gabriel cried out. With a loud cry, Lucifer jumped and smacked the ball down. The ball flew passed Ruby and Lilith, landing on their side of the court. Garth blew on his silver whistle and waved a sunglow gold flag, signaling the Angels had won the point.

"Point one goes to Angels!" Garth announced, and the crowd cheered for their lovely heroes.

"Oh, we're sorry." Gabriel falsely apologized.

"Was that too 'unbalanced' for you?" Lucifer asked mockingly, snickering.

"Don't get so cocky." Ruby tsked. "The challenge has just begun." And so the real game started. Demons spiked and Angels earned the next point. With a confident smile, Lucifer signaled his brother behind his back: two, two, five, zip. Nodding, Gabriel spiked. Saving the ball, Lilith passed it to Ruby, who smacked the ball down. Demons earned the point. And so this continued. Angels, Demons, Demons, Angels, Angels, Angels, and so forth. Until the game came to an end: Demons with 18 points and Angels with 21.

"Game point and Angels win the match!" Garth announced, blowing his pea whistle and waving the sunglow gold flag high in the air. Gabriel and Lucifer cheered happily, all-the-while gloating and high-fiving their brothers and friends.

"Sister," Lilith whispered to Ruby. "I think it is time to move on to Plan B."

"Indeed Lilith." Ruby agreed. "I will not lose to those pitiful Angels." The game then started up again. However, the Angels were losing. Gabriel finally had enough when it was 12-0.

"What the fuck?! You hoes can't just suck one minute and become Beyoncé the next!" Gabriel yelled, clenching his fists.

"I simply cannot fathom what you are talking about." Lilith said with a yawn, unimpressed. "We are merely playing the game. You simply cannot start complaining just because you are losing." She said, giggling to herself. Gabriel fell silent, but Lucifer knew he wasn't finished. As Ruby spiked, Gabriel stripped himself of his swimming trunks. They're similar to boxers after all. So without hesitation or shame, Gabriel transformed them into his pistol and aimed at the volleyball. Closing one eye, Gabriel fired. Watching as the volleyball turned into a puff of blackened smoke.

"I knew you bitches were cheating." Gabriel said, shifting Crotchless back into his swim trunks. "Cursing the damn volleyball so you'd win every match." He grumbled, putting the trunks back on like nothing happened.

"You're no better! This is a beach, not your personal strip club!" Ruby raged, her cheeks beet red and her eyes black like coal. "Not only that, but we're in the middle of a game! You can't abuse the rules just because you're losing!"

"You're shitting me, right?!" Gabriel screamed in outrage. Lucifer simply huffed, snatching another volleyball from the sidelines and pouring Holy Water over it.

"Ball's up!" Lucifer called out in what seemed like a warning as he served the volleyball. Lucky for her, Ruby had managed to jump out the way while Lilith bashed it into nothingness with her own weapon.

"What is wrong with you?! Are you trying to kill me?!" Ruby screeched.

"You started it!" Gabriel argued in protest. Gabriel was ready to tear Ruby a new one, when another volleyball was served. And before any one could react, the ball landed on the Angels' side of the court. Thus the Demons earned the point. 13-0.

"Now that I've got your attention, let's get one thing straight." Lilith said, smoothing her hair back to tumble pass her shoulders. "We've been going easy on you from the start." She said, gesturing to herself and Ruby. "But if you'd like to play for real..."

"Bring it." Lucifer and Gabriel insisted.

"Good. Let's make this interesting." Lilith said, and the boys hummed in interest. "This shall be the last game. No second chances. And whoever loses the match has to get completely naked." Lilith explained, smirking with a devilish gleam in her eyes. The crowd hushed themselves as they awaited the Archangels to answer. Lucifer and Gabriel turned to one another, serious looks on their faces as they weighed the pros and cons of this game. Finally with knowing nods, the brothers smirked and turned back to the Malum Sisters. Lilith's smirk turned into a frown upon seeing how confident they were.

"We'll accept your offer." Gabriel spoke. "But I want you to reassure my baby brother of one thing."

"Castiel? Not you?" Ruby questioned, and Gabriel nodded. "Very well. What is it?"

"When you return to whatever sewer drain you belong to, don't mention Crowley's name or his current whereabouts to your boss." Gabriel said. It wasn't so much as a request, but rather a demand.

"Is that all you want?" Ruby asked, chuckling. Gabriel and Castiel nodded. "Fine then." She said, agreeing to this offer. "Now, about _our_ deal..." She trailed off, and thumbed at the strap of her bikini.

"Yeah." The Archangels said. "We have a deal." They decided. Lilith nodded curtly and rolled the ball towards the Angels' side of the court with a small kick.

"Your ball." She sneered. Gabriel placed his foot on top of the ball, rolling it around before kicking it into the air and catching it. Throwing the ball into the air, Gabriel served.

"Ball's up!" As the match progressed, to the untrained naked eye, it would look like flashes of currant red and electric blue flying across the court. Although to Castiel, Michael, and Crowley it looked like a real match. Demons, Demons, Angels, Demons, Angel, Angels, Angels, Demons, and so on. Until the game came to a pause while everyone tried to catch their breathe. Demons with 20 points and Angels with 20 points. A tie. Garth blew the whistle and waved both flags high in the sky. "It's anyone's game now!" Ruby turned to Lilith and nodded, getting into position. As Lilith served the ball, Ruby threw the blonde into the air. Gabriel jumped for the ball, meeting Lilith's gaze.

"I hate to disappoint you, dear Gabriel, but this match is ours!" Lilith claimed boldly, slamming the ball down with great force.

"Lucifer!" Gabriel cried out. In the blink of an eye, Lucifer was on his stomach. His arms outstretched and his hands clasped together, blocking the ball as it came crashing down. Beating the volleyball upwards with his fists, Lucifer passed it to Gabriel as the younger Archangel took a tumble. With a startled yelp, Gabriel spiked the ball out of pure instinct.

"Go Gabe!" Sam cheered encouragingly. Snapping out of his stupor, Gabriel spread his wings and flew over the Demons' heads. With a small twitch of her eyebrow, Lilith brought out her own wings and took flight, meeting Gabriel's gaze.

"I hate to disappoint you, dear Lilith, but this match is ours." Gabriel mocked, his halo flashing for a brief second. "Repent bitches!" Hitting the volleyball with everything he had, the ball flew down and crashed into the sand like a fireball. The audience covered their eyes as the sand kicked up and only revealed them when they were sure the excitement had ceased. They were surprised however to see the volleyball had created a heart-shaped glass crater. For the final time, Garth loudly blew his whistle and raised the sunglow gold flag over his head, wildly waving the flag about as he blew the whistle like a child on a sugar rush. "Game set and match, girls." Gabriel said, gracefully landing besides his dear brother. A earsplitting grin on his face. "We win." He taunted, blowing a raspberry at the Demons.

"Well?" Lucifer inquired, raising an amused brow. "Whatcha standing around for? You better start stripping."

"A deal is a deal after all." Gabriel reminded them, wagging a finger at the girls. "You should consider yourselves lucky. Your fanbase is about to make it rain up in here." He said, snickering to himself. Ruby and Lilith blushed heavily in embarrassment. They should've known better than to make deals with Angels.

* * *

In the middle of the night  
Nearby motel

The Malum Sisters left soon after their strip teased and kept their word, promising to keep Crowley's name and location out of their mouth. Afterwards, they continued playing volleyball. It continued on like that before they decided to leave as the sun went down. They drove to the nearest motel and decided it was best to hit the road tomorrow. After taking showers and getting in their pajama sets, the group went to their respective rooms to head to bed early. All except for Gabriel. The little Archangel was wide awake. Tired of staring at the plain white ceiling, Gabriel decided to head out. He was in the mood for some ice-cream. Snagging the keys to Transparent, Gabriel exited his and Lucifer's motel room.

"Where are you heading off to?" As soon as he heard those words, Gabriel spun around to attack whoever had scared him. But quickly stopped himself when he saw it was just Sam.

"Damnit, Sammy." Gabriel groaned, scrubbing his face. "I could've knocked your head off."

"Sorry." Sam apologized with a sheepish laugh. "So, where are you going?" He asked, noticing the keys Gabriel had wrapped around his fingers.

"Target probably." Gabriel said with a shrug. "Ice-cream run."

"I'll go with you." Sam said, and turned to head towards Transparent. But Gabriel hadn't moved. "You coming?"

"Yeah..." But Gabriel looked lost. "Sam, I have a question." He suddenly said, licking his lips in thought.

"About?" Sam inquired.

"Humanity." Gabriel replied, and Sam nodded. "Michael told me there are many definitions to the word 'humanity'. So, uh, what is it?" He asked. "What is the _true_ definition of humanity?" Gabriel asked. This question shocked Sam. He wasn't expecting such a serious question. Not at this time of night. Not from Gabriel.

"Why do you ask?" Sam asked, avoiding the question.

"No reason." Gabriel said, but Sam knew he was lying. "Sammy-Boy, please answer the question." But Sam didn't. So Gabriel decided to try another approach. "Sammy, what do you think Angels are?" He asked, but Sam didn't know how to reply. "We're warriors. We protect Heaven and guard Purgatory. We're made of Grace and Sin or Virtue."

"Where is this going?" Sam asked curiously.

"Angels aren't human, Sam." Gabriel replied. Suddenly it all clicked. " _I'm_ not human, Sam." Gabriel added, bubbly tears prickling the corner of his eyes. "I'm made of Grace. My DNA was tweaked to harbor the Sin of Gluttony. All I'm good for are stupid jokes, cheap party tricks, and showing douchebags a 'good time'. I run away from my troubles and was kicked out of Heaven because I wasn't good enough. Father used to tell me that I should have faith in humanity. My humanity. But what even is that?!" Gabriel tried to ignore the fact that his voice was cracking and that he was crying in front of the infamous Sam Winchester, but he just couldn't. "That's all I want to know." Gabriel croaked, wiping his eyes dry with the underside of his wrist.

"Gab-"

"You mind forgetting all this?" Gabriel muttered, interrupting Sam, sniffling softly. "I don't wanna talk about it. Not now." He said, staring up at Sam with saddened pink-rimmed eyes. Sam let out a sigh through his nose and hesitantly nodded in agreement. "Thanks."

"No problem." Sam said. "You still up for going on that ice-cream run?" He then asked, hoping to lighten the mood. This earned him a small smile from the short man, which made him smile, knowing he had accomplished his mission.

"I always am." Gabriel said meekly, nodding curtly.

"Good." Sam said, taking the keys from the short Archangel. "Because I'm driving."

"So bossy." Gabriel mumbled, punching Sam in the ribs, his small smile growing and turning playful. Sam let out a small laugh.

"Please, you love when I'm bossy." Sam joked, nudging Gabriel's shoulder with his elbow. Gabriel chuckled and nodded in agreement.

"I can't say I disagree with that fact."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You must be wondering: Are Garth and Bess human? The answer is no, they're still Werewolves. They just never mentioned this fact to the Winchesters. Find out why real soon.
> 
> So now you've met Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Castiel, Chuck, Amara, Donatello, Sam, Dean, Jess, Brady, Ruby, Lilith, Jervis, and Crowley. Now we have Garth and Bess. Who else shall we meet as this adventure continues?


	11. It's Code

The next afternoon  
Michael's motel room

"Michael, I don't wanna go home!" Gabriel complained, looking up at Michael with his best pout. "Mikey, c'mon! One day at the beach isn't a vacation. That's a day off and you know it too!" He whined, holding onto Michael's leg tighter while his older brother tried to shake him off. "Michael, please, this is Angel abuse!"

"Gabriel does have a point ya'know." Dean said from the doorway of the motel room, watching as the chaos progressed. "If you overwork yourself, you're gonna burn out. Archangel or not." He stated, trying to hide the smirk as Gabriel rubbed himself against Michael like a kitten looking for attention.

"We have to protect Sioux Falls." Michael groaned out as he tried to get Gabriel to let go of him.

"Just a few more days, Mikey, that's all I'm asking for." Gabriel said. "Please Mikey? Pretty please with three ice-cream scoops, chocolate syrup, hazelnut caramel syrup, butterscotch sauce, whipped cream, chocolate chips, M&M's, strawberries, and a cherry on top?" He begged, still giving Michael his best pout. But Michael just sighed.

"Gabriel, please, have some dignity." Michael said, pinching the bridge of his nose. Gabriel hummed in thought, realizing that his pout alone won't work on Michael. So he decided to take it up a notch. Once again, Gabriel gave Michael his best pout and even brought out his sweet babydoll eyes. "Gabriel, no." Michael said, trying to avoid Gabriel's gaze. But Gabriel showed no mercy and whimpered in response, as if he was going to cry any second. "Please, stop. Anything, but the baby pout." Michael pleaded, but that wasn't the answer Gabriel was looking for. Gabriel's whimper grew louder as his bottom lip quivered. Michael eventually let out a defeated groan and hung his head. "Six more days." Michael muttered, and Gabriel cheered happily. "But that's all you get." He added. Gabriel nodded his head feverishly and gave Michael a mock salute.

"Sir, yes, sir!" And with that, Gabriel disappeared with that familiar swoosh sound and a flutter of wings. No doubt to tell everyone else the great news.

"You poor bastard." Dean said, trying to stifle his laughter.

"Don't patronize me." Michael grumbled, looking up at Dean through his dark bangs. Dean simply shook his head and walked over to the sulking Archangel.

"Don't worry, man. Sam gets me with the puppy pout all the time." Dean said empathically, patting Michael's back. "First he stares at you with the sad puppy dog eyes and then goes straight for the kill with the pouty lip."

"I guess we're both poor bastards, huh?"

"And how." Dean agreed. They then sighed exhaustedly in unison before laughing to themselves. Being an older brother was never easy.

"Mikey, Dean-o, check it out!" The two older brothers perked up upon hearing Gabriel's voice once again, and looked up just in time to see the little Archangel running into the motel room. 'At least he used the door this time.' Michael thought, recalling this morning when Gabriel popped up out of nowhere and jumped onto him like a maniac. "So I was telling everyone the news when Bess showed me this flyer." Gabriel said, showing his friend and his brother the piece of colorful parchment paper. The only words Dean and Michael were able to read however were _"COME ONE! COME ALL!"_ before Gabriel turned the paper towards himself to read it. "Come one, come all, to the greatest arcade this town has ever seen. Welcome to Codes. It's new, it's improved, it's Heaven on Earth."

"Heaven on Earth, huh?" Michael repeated with a tiny chuckle.

"The flyer says that the place is just down the street from Santa Monica beach." Gabriel stated, folding up the flyer. "Can we go?" He asked. Michael sighed and nodded in defeat. He lost one fight already. He might as well give in to save himself the embarrassment. "You're the best." Gabriel said, standing on the tips of his toes to kiss Michael's cheek. Michael smiled and smoothed his hand through Gabriel's messy locks. "C'mon Dean-o." Gabriel then said, taking hold of Dean's wrist and guiding him out of Michael's motel room. "Let's get out of these pajamas so we can go to the arcade." He said excitedly. And with that, Gabriel and Dean left.

"Father have mercy..."

Later that afternoon  
Codes

When the group arrived at the arcade, they saw how different it was compared to many other arcades. It reminded Garth of Dave-n-Busters. It was spacious for one, which was perfect considering they had a large group that were basically joined at the hip. There was a prize area, a dessert area which was next to two photo booths, a section for classic old-school games that the Winchesters knew from childhood memories, and another second for new games that nobody had ever heard of.

"Split up." Everyone said, giving each other agreeing nods and knowing looks. The married couple went to the old-school game section to see what games they were familiar with. The Winchesters, the mischievous Anarchy Brothers, and the Demonic-Angelic couple went to the new games section to see what videos games were out. And Michael scampered off by himself for some peace. As the group of six started to explore the variety of new games, Sam nudged Dean when he spotted an all too familiar game.

"Dance Dance Revolution." Dean said, smiling to himself.

"Isn't this an old-school game?" Sam asked, but Dean shook his head and pointed to the title. Sam squinted his eyes: Dance Dance Revolution Rave.

"It ain't no Just Dance, but I'll take a swing at it." Gabriel said, taking off his signature forest green jacket and tying it around his waist. Stepping up to the plate, the game came to life. The speakers glowed all the colors of the rainbow and a chibi boy popped up on screen.

_"A new challenger!"_ The game spoke cheerfully through the chibi boy, surprising the Winchesters. _"Say your name into the mic so that we may begin."_ The chibi boy told Gabriel, holding a sign over his head that was a painted with a messy black down pointing arrow. Gabriel's eyes followed the arrow to see the microphone was just under the screen. Bending at the waist, Gabriel cleared his throat.

"Gabriel."

_"The name that was given was 'Gabriel'. Is that correct?"_ The chibi boy asked, rotating the sign to display Gabriel's name on the other side.

"Yes." Gabriel answered, speaking into the microphone.

_"Splendid!"_ The chibi cheered as confetti rained down to switch the background to the main menu. The little Archangel straightened up and waited eagerly for further instruction. _"Choose a mode."_ The chibi boy instructed, showing Gabriel how to operate the game. Gabriel reached out and swiped, realizing it was touchscreen. With a thoughtful hum, Gabriel looked through the four options he was given: **ROOKIE** , **BASIC** , **PRO** , **CHALLENGE**. Gabriel selected **CHALLENGE**. _"Choose your secondary mode."_ The chibi boy then instructed, giving Gabriel two options: **REGULAR** or **KARAOKE**. Gabriel happily selected **KARAOKE**. _"Select your song."_ Gabriel's eyes glided over the list of songs as he scrolled, and was impressed to see that they programmed the game to save the song for the other DDR, all-the-while putting in some actual songs that were considered popular.

"This one." Gabriel said to himself, selecting a song he knew best: Sleepless Beauty.

_"Excellent choice!"_ The chibi boy cheered. _"Ready to perform?"_ The chibi asked, holding up two different signs: **YES** or **NO**. Gabriel clicked **YES**. _"Perfect!"_ The background then changed from the menu to the dancefloor, which was similar to the other DDR games. _"Ready? Set? Perform!"_ Immediately he was met with a hard beat as arrows came flying upwards.

_"Tooku de me o hikarasete mezameru monotachi matte iru."_ The Winchesters were left awestruck upon hearing Gabriel sing the first words to this Japanese song. One minute they thought they knew everything about the Archangel and then he goes and does something like this. _"Yoru no jouheki sasowarete utsurisumu mure no nukegara ni."_

_"Deguchi no nai."_ Lucifer joined in, singing in unison with Gabriel.

_"Shougeki ni taeru tsumori nara."_ Gabriel continued, blowing his big brother a kiss without looking away from his game.

_"Kuzureru hodo."_ Lucifer and Gabriel sung in sync once again, harmonizing.

_"Itsuwari o misete."_ Gabriel finished, rolling his body to the beat. _"Umarekawareru anata yo hitori hohoemanaide hitomi o irodoru. Nozonda sekai ga totsuzen hai ni natte mo kiseki ni mada meguriaeru."_

_"Sotto dakishimete kowasu you ni."_ Castiel sung quietly with his brothers, much to their delight.

_"Muku na mama de sarasarete hanabira o chirasu hana no you ni. Migaku houseki te no naka no hibi ni sae kizukihajimeteru."_

_"Tsumetai te ga."_ The Anarchy Brothers sung in sync, sounding like sirens, which caused the Winchesters to do another doubletake.

_"Nukeochita toge o hirou kara."_ Gabriel kept on singing, running his hands through his golden caramel locks.

_"Madoromu hi ga."_ Lucifer grasped Castiel's hands and began to dance with his little brother as they all fell in sync once again.

_"Kusuburitsuzukeru."_ Gabriel continued, spinning around briefly to wink at his brothers, all-the-while hitting the correct arrows like the showoff he knew he was. _"Ima mo todokanu hikari no yukue azayaka ni mau omoi o egakou. Michibiku kotoba ga koborete shimawanu you ni utsuru toki o osorenaide."_

_"Deguchi mo naku."_ The Anarchy Brothers sung together, laughing to themselves for no particular reason. _"Kuzureochiru."_ The instrumental break then started up and the arrows started coming faster, but Gabriel was barely breaking a sweat. Left and right, left and right, up and left, up and left, up and down, down, right, right, up, left, down and right and hold, now left and up, up, down, left and right, left and right and hold, now sing!

_"Umarekawari no anata yo hitori hohoemanaide hitomi o irodoru. Nozonda sekai ga totsuzen hai ni natte mo kiseki wa mada megurikuru."_

_"Todokanu hikari no yukue azayaka ni mau omoi o egakou."_ The Anarchy Brothers harmonized once more, laughing happily and dancing as they sung. _"Michibiku kotoba ga koborete shimawanu you ni utsuru toki o osorenaide."_ Lucifer spun Castiel, letting the Angel twirl into Crowley's arms, which surprised the Demon somewhat. _"Sotto dakishimete zutto tsukamaete motto kokoro made kowasu you ni."_ The song then ended and the scores were tallied up.

_"Marvelous full combo! AAA! New high score!"_ The chibi boy spoke as he reappeared, cheering for the talented Archangel. _"You were on fire!"_

"That was amazing!" The Winchesters cheered, making Gabriel blush.

"It was nothing, really." Gabriel said modestly, stepping down from the platform.

"We didn't know you guys knew Japanese." Dean said. "I know a bit of Japanese myself." He added proudly.

"In Heaven, we were taught every language there was to know." Castiel informed.

"C'mon, let's look for more games." Gabriel said excitedly, urging the group to continue on with their fun. So they did. Walking around the new games section like tourists visiting a foreign country and pointing like they were in a carnival, until Dean had found a game he had only played once. Legend of Zelda. But it was different. The full title said Legend of Zelda: Boss Fights. There was a large television screen and a slick silver platform in front with different weapons leaning against the game in slots which acted as controllers. Without a word, Castiel walked up to the game. As soon as both of his feet touched the slick platform, the platform glowed and turned form a shiny silver to a bright true blue. Curious, Castiel started walking and he stayed in place, almost like he was on a treadmill.

_"I see you're getting the hang of the game."_ A high-pitched feminine voice said. Looking up, Castiel met with three bright lights. The first was cyan blue, the second was honey yellow, and the third was wine purple. They were fairies. _"My name is Navi."_ The cyan blue fairy said. _"This is Tatl."_ Navi motioned to the honey yellow fairy. _"And this is Tael."_ Navi then motioned to the wine purple fairy. _"We're your fairy companions."_ Navi informed. _"There are different fairy companions depending on the game you choose."_ She stated. _"I'm only gonna tell you how the game works once, so you better pay attention. This game is touchscreen, so you're able to select your game and battle through touch obviously. Walk normally to move Link. Choose your weapons and swap them out at any time. Your shield has controls inside so that you may use potions or call us for hints."_ Navi explained. _"Now choose your game."_ She said, displaying many different games of the Zelda series. Castiel hummed in thought as he scrolled through the options before settling on Ocarina of Time. _"Perfect choice! This means I'll be your fairy guide."_ Navi said proudly.

_"Choose your battle!"_ Tatl and Tael then said encouragingly. Castiel almost immediately picked the Dark Link mini-boss battle. _"Freaky. Well, good luck hero!"_

_"Pick up your sword, shield, and hammer so that we can start the fight."_ Navi instructed, and Castiel done as told, sliding his arm through the shield and connecting the hammer to the inside of it while he held the sword in his other hand. The items activated upon being picked up and glowed the same true blue. _"Perfect. Now get ready."_ The three fairies then flew away and the screen turned black momentarily before presenting the battle. Link stood outside the door of the mini-boss in his blue tunic with Navi at his side. Walking forward, Link entered the room only for it to lock behind him. Castiel wasn't expecting that to happen. Still, he continued on. 'The room seems to be empty.' Castiel thought, confused. As he walked around inspecting the strange room, Castiel finally noticed something. A dark figure standing in front of the dead tree. Inching towards the figure, Castiel was surprised when the figured launched at him. _"Dark Link!"_ Navi yelled in warning. _"Conquer yourself!"_ She advised. Swinging his sword, Link clashed with Dark Link until Dark Link flipped away. Castiel ran forward, swinging his sword horizontally.

"Cas, that won't work!" Sam called out, trying to warn Castiel. But Dark Link had flipped on to the tip of Link's sword and slashed at Link. Castiel lost half a heart.

"What just happened?" Castiel asked, using his sword to block Dark Link's fast attacks.

"That's his defense." Sam stated. "Use your hammer."

_"Catch him off guard!"_ Navi advised. Castiel nodded and reached for the hammer, quickly swapping it out for the sword. Bringing the hammer over his head, Castiel brought it down. Dark Link let out a cry and fell into the water. But he came back up. _"Good! Keep going!"_ And so, Castiel used the hammer a second time. And then a third time. Then a fourth. Then a fifth. And then a sixth until he swapped out the hammer for the sword. Castiel stuck his tongue out the corner of his mouth as he and Dark Link kept clashing. His family and friends kept cheering him on which caused butterflies to start forming in the pit of his stomach. Finally breaking his defense, Castiel was able to slash Dark Link, causing him to disappear into the water before resurfacing. Running at each other, Castiel brought his sword overhead and jumped. Dark Link did the same, but his sword touched the ground first, giving Castiel the advantage as his sword overlapped Dark Link's. Trapping him. With a quick maneuver, Castiel once again slashed Dark Link.

"You got him on the ropes, Cas!"

"You're doing great!"

"Show 'im whose boss!" Switching to the hammer, Castiel blocked with his shield before bashing Dark Link with his weapons. "Hit him again, Cassie!" With a nod, Castiel dodged Dark Link's slash and hit him again with the hammer.

"One more time!" His teammates cheered, which made him laugh a little. With another running start, Castiel swung his hammer overhead and brought it down.

"Hit 'im with the power move!" Dean told him, pointing to the top righthand corner, where a transparent gem sat. The buttons. It must've been an option in his shield. Swapping the hammer for the sword, Castiel countered Dark Link's attacks. Backing up and dodging the attacks that came from above. Once he found an opening, Castiel pressed the button. As Link preformed his super move, flames rose up from within him, attacking his foe. Dark Link let out an agonizing cry before he disappeared for good. A familiar tune then played, signaling the battle was over. Picking up the rupee, Castiel moved Link to exit the room. Noting that the strange surroundings shifted and became a normal room once again. As Link exited the room, the game flashed and the words **VICTORIOUS** appeared on screen.

_"That was a good battle, hero."_ Navi complimented Castiel, who smiled and returned the weapons back where they belonged. The platform's true blue glow then dimmed and turned back to its pervious shiny silver gloss. Castiel slowly stepped down from the platform and was immediately praised.

"You were so good, Cas!"

"Impressive swordsmanship, Feathers."

"Woah, Cas, that was unbelievable. Believe it or not, I'm still processing this."

"Never took you for a gamer, Cassie, I gotta admit."

"I sorta envy you, baby brother."

"I couldn't have done it without your encouragement." Castiel confessed with a bashful blush. "Come on, there's so many other games to play." He said shyly, quickly changing the subject. They all laughed at the Angel's bashful behavior, but continued to explore so Castiel didn't turn into a cherry boi.

* * *

That late evening  
The motel

Once again it was an eventful day for the group of nine. Gabriel ended up finding Mario Kart 8 Deluxe with six controllers coincidentally enough. Gabriel played as Toad, Lucifer played as Dry Bones, Sam played as Luigi, Dean played as Mario, Castiel played as Princess Peach, and Crowley played as Yoshi. They all played a few rounds before everyone decided called it quits because Lucifer kept winning every time. They claimed he was cheating somehow. Lucifer then found Super Smash Bros Ultimate for Nintendo Switch. Gabriel played as Kirby, Lucifer played as Dark Pit, Sam played as Ness, and Dean played as Marth. Castiel and Crowley just watched since they weren't as skilled as the others. The Demonic-Angelic then met up with the married couple soon after, where the four decided to explore the arcade together to find games that required teams. The rest of the day went on like that until they decided to leave and return to the motel. But instead of going to their separate rooms, they all cooped up in Michael's room all dressed up in their pajamas.

"So I brought some movies from home." Gabriel said, rummaging through his duffle and digging through it. Taking out the DVDs that he collected. "I got The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen, V for Vendetta, all the X-Men movies, Baby Driver, Who Framed Roger Rabbit, all the Pirates of the Caribbean movies, all the Chucky movies, and Deadpool."

"That's a lot of options." Sam said, amused and a little awestruck.

"No it isn't." The Anarchy Brothers disagreed, deadpanning.

"So what's it gonna be?" Gabriel asked, showcasing his movie choices.

"X-Men." Everyone said, pointing to the collection. Gabriel grinned.

"Perfect."

"Who has the snacks?" Lucifer asked, although he really didn't have to ask.

"Me!" Garth and Gabriel cheered, their hands shooting up in the air.

"Shouldn't we eat actual food too?" Crowley said, raising an eyebrow. "Something like wings or Chinese?"

"I'm already on it." Michael said, pulling out his phone. "Everyone alright with pizza?" He asked, and everyone nodded. "Cool. Where are we ordering from?" He asked, but nobody answered. "Alright..." Michael hummed in thought. "Raise your hand for Domino's." He then said. Gabriel, Dean, and Castiel raised their hands. Sam looked at Dean with a grimace.

"What?" Dean huffed. "I like my pizza seasoned to the max."

"Raise your hand for Pizza Hut." Michael said, moving on. Bess and Lucifer raised their hand. Gabriel gasped dramatically.

"Traitor." Gabriel said to his brother. Lucifer scoffed and shoved Gabriel, causing him to topple over with a yelp.

"Raise your hand for Papa John's." Michael said, stifling his laugh. Crowley, Sam, Garth, and even Michael himself raised their hands. Everyone else whined in protest. "Nope, we have a winner." Michael said rather smugly, dialing up the pizza store's number. It rung twice before someone picked up and greeted Michael. "Hi, yeah, may I have four large pizzas. One with the works, one garden fresh, one spicy Italian, and make the last a John's favorite." Michael requested. He then waited, answering the person with the occasional hum. "My drink?" Michael asked, looking towards the others for suggested. They all shrugged. Michael rolled his eyes. "Two bottles of Mountain Dew." He said. "Twenty minutes? That's perfect. Thank you, bye."

"Should I pop in the movie now or should we wait?" Gabriel then asked, holding up the DVD case for X-Men.

"Actually..." Garth spoke up, grabbing everyone's attention. "I have to get something-"

" _We_ have to get something off _our chests_." Bess interrupted, surprising Garth. "I am your wife and you are my husband. We'll do this together." She said, clearly determined. Her expression was firm and tone came off as very protective. Garth shook off his shock expression and gave his wife a fond smile. The couple gave one another a knowing nod before turning back to the confused group.

"Should we leave?" Dean asked awkwardly, coughing into his fist.

"No, we want you to stay." Bess said, unconsciously grasping Garth's hands. "This is really important."

"We had a really fun time being with you guys and like marriage, friendship is based off of trust. And you guys put your trust and faith in me, so I should be able to do the same for you." Garth said, rambling, which obviously meant he was stalling. Garth continued to talk about trust and friendship and wasn't really getting to the point. Bess then proceeded to rest her head on Garth's shoulder, which caused him to stop talking immediately. It was like watching a computer reboot.

"What my silly husband is trying to say is that we're Werewolves. Although we prefer Lycanthropes." Bess blurted out. "I'm a born pureblood while Garth is a bitten pureblood, which is another reason why we wear these." Bess explained as they both untucked their necklaces. The charm was a shiny silver bullet and thick black cord that went through it. The group leaned forward to examine the accessories. They noticed the two wearing the necklaces at the beach, but simply thought the charms were fake. But on closer inspection, they saw that the charms were real.

"Doesn't it hurt?" Sam asked curiously, his eyebrow furrowing in concern.

"Well, yes, it does sting." Bess admitted. "But nothing that we aren't used to."

"Does it mean something?"

"It represents that we're ok with showing weakness and if it ever comes down to it," Bess pinched the bullet between her thumb and middle finger. "this bullet will be the end of us."

"That's rather interesting, now isn't it?" Crowley inquired, almost speaking aloud to himself.

"You're acting so calm about this." Garth said quietly, his eyes glancing over all his friends.

"I admit, we were surprised." Dean spoke up, and everyone agreed verbally. "But we're not mad." He reassured them. "Personally, I'm curious."

"Thanks for being cool with this." Garth said gratefully, snuggling closer to his beloved wife.

"No problem."

"Anybody got anything else to get off their chest?" Crowley asked in suggestion, looking around. Gabriel and Lucifer gave each other knowing secretive looks before looking elsewhere with blushes on their cheeks. They weren't really to tell everyone what they discovered about themselves just yet.

"I actually have a question for Cas." Dean said, raising his hand as if he was back in kindergarten. "This is gonna sound dumb, but when did you and Crowley fall in love exactly?" He asked quietly, sounding really embarrassed. "I only ask because I know you won't sugarcoat anything and because this couldn't wait for later..." He explained himself. "If you don't wanna answer-"

"The moment I fell in love with Crowley was when he first spoke to me." Castiel interrupted, answering Dean's question, his voice sweet and genuine. "It sounds scripted, I know. But his voice..." Castiel paused and smiled to himself. Dean smirked knowingly to himself.

"You have absolutely no chill." Gabriel said to his younger brother, chuckling. "You really are shameless, Cassie."

"Well it's true!"

"Your turn, puppy." Lucifer said teasingly to Crowley.

"I really wish you wouldn't call me that." Crowley grumbled. But Lucifer shook his head and Crowley sighed unhappily, knowing he had lost the battle. "Anyway," He started, deciding to move on. "I fell in love with Castiel during Thanksgiving." Crowley said bluntly and proudly. "He had met me in the park with three Tupperware containers and then proceeded to ramble on about what his ridiculous family did for Thanksgiving."

"You guys are so mushy!" Gabriel whined playfully, draping himself over Lucifer. "I'm so envious of your relationships." Gabriel said, his eyes shifting between the Demonic-Angelic couple and the married Werewolf couple. "Seriously, where are our lovebug brothers and sisters when you need them?" He asked, referring to the Cupids up in Heaven.

"Laughing at your desperation, probably." Lucifer teased, plucking Gabriel's ear playfully. Gabriel batted Lucifer's hand as his cradled his ear, glaring at his big brother.

"I'm sure the Cherubim are working on finding the perfect matchings for you two." Michael said, snickering to himself. "I wouldn't be surprised if they were making you two wait for your significate others for pure shits and giggles."

"They've done it before." Castiel added, giggling to himself. He remembered that perfectly. How a small group of Cherubim decided to play jokes on two specific people because they were hardheaded. In the end, the Cupids spared the two from their pranks and pushed them together. Right on time too. Just because they run tight schedules, doesn't mean they can't have a little bit of fun.

"Well I hope you find the relationship you're looking for." Bess said to Gabriel, secretively glancing over to Sam. "And I hope the same for you, Lucifer." She said to Lucifer, secretively glancing to Dean. "I would say the same to you, Michael, but I'm sure you're already happy." Bess said, secretively giving Michael a knowing toothy smile. _Hey, Bess is a married woman. She knows these kinds of things._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ya'know, I had lots of fun writing this chapter, especially when they all went to the arcade. It was nice creating games thanks to my imagination. I really do wish there were games out there that are like DDR Rave and LoZ: Boss Fights. To me, in my own opinion, an arcade is like a fun place where everyone can go to have fun and show off their own little skills, like with Gabriel's dancing, Castiel's swordsmanship, and the Anarchy Brothers' singing. I also wanted to keep that bubbly happy atmosphere in the end for when Garth and Bess finally told their friends the truth. And I hope you like the subtle hint I gave you about Michael.


	12. The Hideous Past and The Beautiful Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lucifer is haunted by nightmares of past memories; Dean and Lucifer explore more of the Angels' past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Favor, if anyone knows Enochian and is willing to teach me, that would be hella awesome. Something along the lines of: Ol aziazor elasa, which should mean I love you. So pretty please, if anyone knows Enochian, would you mind contacting me? Either here on AO3 or on Tumblr under the user pastelbluebirds is fine.
> 
> For the rest, if you just wanna talk, you know where to look for me.
> 
> PS: This chapter is mixed with angst and fluff, but it also contains cute-sexy moments. I appreciate this chapter very much, because we're getting close to the smut and I'm wondering if I need to add more chapters, because I don't know if 30 is gonna do.  
> PPS: You'll see the words "tilmahtl" and "maxtlatl" when Lucifer and Dean start talking. And if I did my research correctly, a tilmahtl is a cloak and a maxtlatl is a breechcloth.  
> PPPS: I'm writing another BMC story that is not apart of the Bi Bi Bi! Series, so watch out.

As Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest droned on throughout the room, one by one, the group of nine fell asleep. Starting from Garth, Castiel, Gabriel, Dean, Bess, Sam, Crowley, Lucifer, and Michael. After numerous times of playing the movie menu, the TV wounded up turning off by itself, which turned out to the rather convenient. As the night stretched along, Michael found himself waking up upon hearing a strange noise. Sitting up, Michael searched the room. But there was no noise. Shrugging, Michael went to lay back down when he heard the noise again: a whimper. Coming from Lucifer. Lucifer continued to whimper and groan in his sleep, occasionally tossing and turning as he slumbered. Michael watched with a blank expression. There was nothing he could do to ease his younger brother. He wished he could do more, but he couldn't battle dreams. And Lucifer was simply...dreaming. 'Dreaming.' Michael thought bitterly, scoffing quietly. Dreams were pleasant. Lucifer wasn't dreaming. That would mean he was sleeping comfortably. Lucifer would never admit it, but most of his nights were usually filled with nightmares. _"They're just unpleasant dreams is all. Not nightmares. There's a big difference."_ Michael never knew what the dreams were about though. But now this was his chance to figure out what was making Lucifer uneasy. Reaching forward, Michael gently pressed the pads of his pointer finger and middle finger to Lucifer's temple and closed his eyes in concentration, feeling an unfamiliar icy surge go through him.

 

_"Father, where are you taking me?" Lucifer asked as he continued to follow his father through the many halls of Heaven._

_"You'll find out soon." Chuck replied. Lucifer sighed, but chose not to ask any more questions. Their walk continued until Lucifer finally figured out where they were going. "Stop." Chuck commanded, and Lucifer did as told. "Around this corner stands Gadreel. He guards the Garden of Eden." He stated. "But I'm sure you already knew that."_

_"Gadreel is one of your best warriors. Just a mere Seraph, to be exact. He is the Embodiment of Humility and a prized student of Ezekiel."_

_"Very good." Chuck praised his son._

_"But that doesn't explain why you have brought me here." Lucifer said, still confused as to what he was doing. Or about to do._

_"I have seen the future." Chuck stated. "Eve will eat the sacred Forbidden Fruit and then convince Adam to do the same."_

_"And you brought me here to punish her?" Lucifer asked, arching an eyebrow._

_"I brought you here to_ help _her." Chuck corrected Lucifer, surprising him. "Lucifer, I need you to help Eve betray me."_

_"B-but that means I would be betraying you." Lucifer said with uncertainty._

_"You'd be_ assisting _me." Chuck corrected him once again, but Lucifer just shook his head. He didn't understand. "Lucifer, please, all will make sense in due time." Chuck assured Lucifer, placing a reassuring hand on his shoulder. "Please. Do me this one deed."_

_"...Do you promise this is all you need of me?" Lucifer asked quietly. Chuck smiled softly and nodded. Lucifer sighed heavily and uneasily, but he trusted his father. Closing his eyes, Lucifer felt himself sink down. Taking a new form. A serpent. The snake was large with emerald scales and goldenrod eyes. Lucifer slithered towards Gadreel, who remained oblivious of this ambush. 'Please, forgive me.' Lucifer thought before coiling up Gadreel's leg. The Angel gasped and tried to defend himself, but Lucifer had coiled himself around Gadreel's upper body before biting into his neck. Although Lucifer had no real venom, he was an Archangel. Substituting his powerful Grace as venom, Lucifer manipulated Gadreel's mind into falling asleep. The Angel's body tensed before falling to the ground. He was out cold. Lucifer then continued, slithering into the Garden without any further problems._

 

Michael gasped in both pain and shock, his eyes instantly snapping open to see that Lucifer was wide awake. Michael tried to back away, but Lucifer's hand had quickly snatched up Michael's wrist and he had absolutely refused to let out. His usual celestial blue eyes were now glowing a dangerous maroon. Lucifer growled like an animal with his teeth barred at his older brother. He looked ready to snap at any moment.

"What the hell do you think you were doing?" Lucifer asked fiercely, tightening his grip of Michael's wrist.

"You were tossing and turning..." Michael answered. "Lucifer, I was concerned for you. Honest." He said, frowning. Lucifer merely blinked at his brother before he huffed and removed his grip, his burning red eyes turning back to their usual pretty blue.

"Concerned, huh? So that gives you permission to rummage around in my head?" Lucifer questioned angrily.

"I just wanted to see what was troubling you." Michael said defensively. "But I suppose I shouldn't have entered your mind without permission." He mumbled, averting his gaze. "I had no idea that it was a memory that was troubling you." Lucifer didn't reply. "...You didn't do anything wrong."

"Yeah? Well, Michael, guess what. You weren't in my shoes." Lucifer said. "You weren't the one that tampered with your brother's Grace so that he would 'go to sleep', while you fucked with Man in the shape of a fucking serpent!" He yelled, jabbing his finger into Michael's shoulder.

"Quiet." Michael hissed through clenched teeth, motioning to the others, who were shattered about the room. Sleeping. "Lucifer, I understand-"

"No! No, Michael, you don't." Lucifer disagreed, shaking his head feverishly and rather violently. And then suddenly he just deflated. Lurching forwards so his locks brushed the ground. It looked as if he was in serious pain. And he might as well be. "Michael, you don't know a damn thing." Lucifer hissed. "And yet...that's not entirely true."

"Lucifer-"

"Do you remember the day me and Gabriel were kicked out of Heaven?" Lucifer suddenly asked. Michael didn't answer. But he didn't have to. He remembered the event as clear as day. "Well let me refresh your memory." Lucifer said through gritted teeth. He then launched himself at his brother and firmly pressed the pads of his index and middle finger to Michael's temple. Once again, Michael felt the same unfamiliar icy surge flow through him.

 

_"Lucifer, Gabriel, I am very disappointed in you both." Chuck said, his eyes full of emptiness and his expression stern. Amara wasn't by his side. Only Michael. And no one else was there. This was serious. Lucifer and Gabriel stayed kneeling at their father's feet, however they couldn't help but glance at each other. "You two have disobeyed me for the last time." Chuck said, raising his voice and causing the boys to flinch. "Sneaking out of Heaven to roam Earth. Causing mischief in Heaven. Causing mischief to mankind. 'Befriending' Pagan Gods." Lucifer and Gabriel wished they could just vanish at that very moment. "I_ cannot _let this slide."_

_"What are you going to do with us?" Gabriel spoke up, raising his head to look up at his father. He was brave. But also stupid. Chuck glared menacingly. Gabriel's breath caught in his throat and he quickly looked back downwards. He never felt so scared before._

_"I will make an example of you." Chuck answered simply. "Lucifer, Archangel and Morningstar, Leader of the Garrison of Lust and Embodiment of Lust." Lucifer quickly stood to his feet, but kept his gaze to the ground. "Gabriel, Archangel and Heavenly Messenger, Leader of the Garrison of Gluttony and Embodiment of Gluttony." Gabriel hesitated, but he knew not to disobey. Rising, Gabriel stood to his feet and kept his eyes staring at the ground. "As of today, you two are banished from Heaven." Lucifer and Gabriel felt tears stinging their eyes. They tried not to let a single tear fall while their bodies shook. They couldn't believe what they were hearing._

_"Are we going to Fall?" Lucifer murmured. Like Gabriel, he was obviously afraid. He tried to be strong, but he couldn't anymore._

_"No, my dear son, you will not Fall." Chuck replied. No longer was he talking to them as God, but as their father. "You will be sent to Earth." He stated. "Monsters, unnatural Ghosts, have been unleashed on humanity. If you wish to prove where your loyalties lie, you will defeat these beasts using your training."_

_"I-is that all?" Gabriel asked hesitantly, refusing to look up. Chuck didn't blame him._

_"Yes." Chuck answered. "Once you collect 1000 Heaven Coins, you will be able to return to Heaven."_

_"Heaven Coins?" Lucifer asked, his head shooting up in disbelief at what he just heard. Gabriel bravely peeked through his bangs in curiosity, just as baffled as his big brother. What were Heaven Coins? And why did they have to collect them? "What is this? Is this some sort of game to you? Is this really our punishment?!"_

_"I know you have many questions, but I will send a guide to help you. Soon." Chuck said dismissively. And with a flick of his wrist, Lucifer and Gabriel were falling from Heaven. They screamed in utter terror and held onto one another tightly. Tears streaming down their face as they flew across the night sky like falling twin stars. When they landed, they found themselves in Sioux Falls. Their wings and Grace intact. But their hearts were broken._

* * *

The next morning  
The Mischievous Anarchy Brothers' motel room  
Dean's P.O.V

"Lucifer!" I called out to the Archangel, knocking on the motel room door. No answer. "Lucifer, hurry up, we're about to leave." Still there was no answer. I sighed and grasped the doorknob. I was kinda surprise however when the door opened before I could turn the knob. Lucifer had finally opened the door.

"Wassup." Lucifer greeted me coolly, leaning against the doorframe tiredly. I was confused. 'Why was he tired? Did he stay up later than all of us? Did he wake up in the middle of the night?' I questioned myself, feeling concerned for the Archangel. Something wasn't adding up. "Come inside." Lucifer said, barely stifling a yawn, moving away from the door. "It's too bright outside." He added, mumbling.

"I'll never understand you guys. You and your brothers, I mean." I said, entering the room and closing the door behind me.

"And why is that?" Lucifer asked, plopping on his bed. I shrugged and sat next to him on the bed.

"You guys eat. You guys sleep. You guys feel pain. You guys do all of things humans regularly do." I explained myself.

"As Angels we don't need food or sleep in order to properly function." Lucifer informed robotically, rubbing the sleep for his eyes. "In fact, when we first came to Earth, food tasted exactly like molecules and we weren't able to dream."

"What happened afterwards?"

"Simple. We adapted." Lucifer replied. "Michael learned about the biology of Angelkind and how to tweak with their Grace. When he 'fixed us' we were able to eat without feeling disgusted and dream like normal." He explained, speaking fondly. "As for pain, at the time that was the only thing we were able to experience when it came to our humanity." He stated, reaching behind him and taking out a book.

"What's that?" I asked, pointing at the book, puzzled.

"Scrapbook." Lucifer answered. "Me and Gabriel would often sneak out of Heaven to go to Earth." He said, opening the scrapbook and mindlessly began to flip through the pages. "We did this every new era. We would take pictures and then return to Heaven before Dad ever noticed when were missing."

"Sounds like a riot." I commented. I nearly laughed at the thought of leaving such a mystical place like Heaven to be on Earth.

"It was." Lucifer said, agreeing. "Wanna take a look?" He asked, pushing the book towards me. "You seem interested." Lucifer said, placing the scrapbook on my lap. He was right. I was interested. Taking his offer, I flipped back to the first page. Six pictures were taped to the page. Three on top, three on bottom. But none of them were labeled. "When was this taken?" I asked, pointing to one of the old photos. Lucifer groaned quietly. I guess it was a picture that Lucifer wasn't really fond of. The picture was in monochrome and was gritty so you couldn't make out much detail. The mischievous Anarchy Brothers wore mature Western clothing and had wide goofy smiles on their faces.

"That was taken in 1842." Lucifer replied. "Northern Texas. Dallas." He added. I nodded and stared at the photo before flipping to the next page. Same as the other one, there were six pictures taped onto the page. Three on top, three on bottom. All unlabeled.

"When was this?" I asked, pointing to yet another picture that I found interesting. Lucifer looked over my shoulder to examine the picture. The detail was much better and the picture was even in color. The brothers were standing by a large familiar monument and they were once again wearing mature clothing.

"1897." Lucifer informed. "Venice, Italy." I hummed and eagerly turned to the next page, almost immediately pointing to yet another interesting photo.

"And this?" I asked, barely taking note of the photo. This made Lucifer laugh, but I didn't blame him for being amused. I was acting like a child about to receive cake and ice-cream at a birthday party.

"1953." Lucifer stated. I then decided to examine the picture, trying to guess where the brothers were myself. Gabriel wore a yellow Hawaiian shirt and khaki pants while Lucifer wore a red Hawaiian shirt and khaki pants. Gabriel was strumming a soprano ukulele while Lucifer was singing. The two were sitting by a bonfire by the seashore under the starry night with their toes buried in the sand.

"Hawaii, huh?" Lucifer shrugged sheepishly. I playfully rolled my eyes and flipped to the next page. I took a pause. Lucifer was nowhere to be found in any of these pictures. Only Gabriel and some woman. She had shoulder length curly brown hair, coco brown skin with a crimson dot painted on her forehead, and fierce dark brown eyes. So dark they almost looked black. She brandished a necklace of heads which laid over her bare breasts, a skirt made of severed arms, and a golden poppy ansorena tiara adored with gems. Her wrists were covered in golden bracelets and matching anklets. She had four arms and she had a bloody knife clenched in one of her hands. She was smiling as she leaned into Gabriel, his arm wrapped around her waist.

"Who exactly is this freaky chick? Who was she to Gabriel?" I questioned, tapping on the photo. Lucifer hummed and followed my finger. He made a disapproving and disgusted noise.

"Kali, the Hindu Goddess." Lucifer hissed. "Why did we even keep this damn picture?" He asked, but for some reason he couldn't bring himself to remove the picture from the album. I looked up at the Archangel, confused as to why he was so angry. "Kali wasn't anything to Gabriel." He said, glaring down at the photo with such hate. "At one point, she was the love of his life, but the poor guy wasn't even certain about his feelings back then. So really, they were just fuckbuddies." Lucifer explained. "Fucking bitch played Gabriel for a fool."

"...How did they know each other?" I asked hesitantly.

"Before we were banished from Heaven, me and Gabriel had been in contact with the Pagan Gods." Lucifer answered. "After we were banished, we joined them. Witness protection, you could say. They took us in until Michael found us. He became our guide." He explained. I could tell he wasn't telling me the whole truth, but I decided not to pester him.

"Which Gods were you?" I asked curiously, deciding to distract him from his pain.

"Gabriel was Loki."

"The Norse God of Mischief and Lies. A Trickster." I stated instinctively, surprising Lucifer. I blushed in embarrassment. "When it comes to mythology and folklore, I'm kinda a nerd." I admitted. Lucifer chuckled and nodded in understood. "So, uh, what about you?"

"I was Xochipilli." Lucifer answered smugly.

"If I remember correctly, Xochipilli was the Aztec God of art, games, beauty, dance, flowers, and song." I said. Lucifer smiled at me proudly. "Ya'know, those personas fit you two perfectly." I complimented. "Also," I continued. "I was wondering if you had any mores pictures from your 'witness protection' experience?"

"Duh, of course." Lucifer then flipped to the next page. "That's Gabe." He pointed to the first picture. Gabriel was dressed in a linen brown accented Viking tunic, tan leggings, leather brown mid-calf boots, and a brass circlet crown. Gabriel was smiling brightly, perched happily on a fluffy pure white cloud which was no doubt of creation of his. It reminded me of Flying Nimbus from the DBZ Series.

"He looks like a prince." I commented.

"I know." Lucifer said fondly. "And this is me." He continued, pointing to the second picture. Lucifer wore a tilmahtli, a maxtlatl, thick golden cuff bracelets, jade spiral gauges and a spiral stone pendant, two rings on each finger, and a headdress. He even wore tribal Aztec face paint.

"You look amazing."

"Really? I think I look ridiculous." Lucifer laughed, but I shook my head and closed the scrapbook.

"Amazing." I repeated, insisting, glancing at the Archangel. Lucifer hummed to himself and leaned his head on my shoulder. I jumped which made him laugh. "Are you...are you falling asleep on me?"

"Maybe."

"No, c'mon, you gotta wake up. Everyone probably left by now." I whined. I was really looking forward to breakfast. Lucifer just shrugged halfheartedly in response before he wrapped an arm around me and fell back onto the mattress, all-the-while taking me down with him. "Lucifer!"

"'M tired." Lucifer mumbled, shifting us both so we were laying on our side. His arms stayed wrapped around me, pulling me to his chest. "Stay." Lucifer requested. I made an unhappy noise, but I chose to stay. Being in his arms felt nice. More than nice actually. "Thanks." Lucifer then leaned up on his free arm and placed a kiss on my cheek. "Goodnight." He said playfully. He went to lay back down, but I stopped him. "Yes?"

"Could you...could you do that again?" I asked, feeling my cheeks and the tips of my ears heat up.

"Kiss you?" Lucifer asked, and I nodded timidly. I didn't bother to look up at him, afraid he would get a better view of my rosy face. Still, Lucifer just chuckled at my sudden shyness. "You have to use your words." He said teasingly.

"...Can you kiss me again?" I requested, doing as he had asked.

"Where? Where do you want me to kiss you, Dean?" Lucifer asked. I wanted to shrug, but that wasn't going to get me what I wanted. 'But what do I want?' I thought. He kissed me on the cheek, so what? But it wasn't like that. When he kissed me, I felt a spark light up within me. And I wanted to feel that spark again.

"Anywhere." I finally said. Lucifer smiled and leaned down, placing a kiss on my cheek once again. "Again." I said, and he kissed my temple. I sighed in content. "Again." I said once more, and he kissed my neck. I shuddered. "Again." I was then shocked when Lucifer turned my head and kissed my lips. Heat filled my body and I felt this need. This need to be closer to Lucifer than I already was. I wanted to have him all to myself. I needed to. "Lucifer, please."

"Soon." Lucifer promised, pecking me on the lips. "Now, we sleep." He said. I bit my bottom lip and nodded curtly. He laid back down and I rolled over so my nose was nestled in his neck. His arm wrapped tightly around me and I didn't want to leave anymore. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight."

Later that evening  
Lucifer's P.O.V

'Lucifer, you really are a fucking idiot.' I thought, scolding myself as I stared down at Dean. He looked peaceful. When I had moved to sit up Indian style, Dean had simply rolled over. His arms embracing the pillow and his cheek nuzzled against it. My hand hovered over his head of short hair, brushing the tousled locks every so often and listening to him mumble incoherently. 'Why would you kiss him like that? Why would you kiss him at all?' I questioned myself. This wasn't how I planned it...

"Planned what?" I nearly fell off the bed when I heard that voice and looked down to see Dean staring back at me with a sleepy gaze. "Hey." Dean greeted me with a silly smile, still half asleep.

"Hey..." I greeted back, gulping thickly.

"What didn't go as planned?" Dean then asked, blinking.

"I said that aloud, huh?" I asked, avoiding Dean's question. Dean nodded and asked me once again what I had meant. "The kiss." I replied. "The kiss didn't go as planned."

"...Do you regret it?" Dean asked quietly.

"Absolutely not." I admitted. "But I didn't want my confession to go down like that."

"How was it supposed to go down?" Dean asked, interested and even a little amused. "Were you planning to sweep me off my feet? Take me on a magic carpet ride to show me a whole new world?" He asked teasingly, lightening the mood. I laughed sarcastically and plucked his forehead. Dean whined and rubbed the sensitive area, flashing me a halfhearted glare.

"Nothing like that." I started. "However, I guess you could say my words are straight out of a chick-flick."

"Fire away." Dean said encouragingly, now fully awake. He even looked excited.

"Well," I started with a little laugh. "I wanted to tell you how handsome you look whenever you're helping us fight Ghosts." I rested my hand on his head, twirling my fingers in the short messy locks. Never looking away. "How contagious and real your laugh sounds." Dean licked his lips and almost seemed to nuzzle into my touch. He never looked away. "How your eyes remind me of green apples and how they glow whenever you're feeling joyful or courageous, which is all the time." Dean pushed himself up until he was sitting, taking my hand from his hair and entwining it with his. "There's so much more I wanted to say, but I fear we might be here forever."

"You really wanted to say all that sappy shit?" Dean asked, and I nodded.

"Well," I paused. "I just did, now didn't I?"

"Yeah, I guess you did." Dean replied, snickering softly. "Ya'know that's the realest thing that anybody has ever said to me." He said. "Usually when someone wants to 'be mine', they say things that I've already heard. It's like listening to a broken record."

"Well they probably haven't been in love with you since day one." I said, and Dean's eyes widened. "Yeah. I finally figured it out." I said sheepishly. "The day I received that miniature music box that you made for me with me singing... It hit me like a ton of bricks. And I still have it."

"Funny. _I've_ been in love with _you_ since day one." Dean confessed. "I figured it out too." He added. "The moment I saw those wings and smirk of yours, I was melting." He said, blushing heavily. He looked like a cute strawberry. "Damn. And here I promised myself no chick-flick moments."

"Same."

"Hey, Luc." I hummed in acknowledgement and was completely taken aback when Dean sat himself in my lap. The move was bold and his expression was confident despite his blush. His arms wrapped themselves around my arms and his legs sat besides my own. "Kiss me again." Dean requested, batting his eyelashes prettily. I laugh loudly and rested my hands on his hips, my thumbs looping through his beltloops and my fingers just grazing his rear.

"Where?" I asked. "Where do you want me to kiss you, Dean?"

"Anywhere." Dean replied immediately. "But I think you know where."

"Oh?" I chuckled. "I do, do I?"

"You better." Dean said, cocking an amused brow. I hummed thoughtful before shaking my head.

"I might need some help remembering."

"Fuck, you're awful." Dean snickered, removing one of his arms from around my neck. "Here." He said, pointing to his pink lips. "And then maybe here too." He said, pointing to his neck. I hummed in interest, feeling the lust boil up within me. But I restrained myself. Be patient.

"And if I wish to bite you?" I asked, raising a mischievous brow.

"Bite away." Dean said cheerfully. "I am yours to mark."

"Mine?" I repeated, my eyebrows shooting up in total awe. Nobody has ever been mine before. Not romantically anyway.

"Yours." Dean said, placing his hands on my cheeks and running a thumb over my bottom lip. "Like I said, I am yours to mark. I am yours, Lucifer. If you'd like that." He said, giving me a choice. A chance to back out now if I wanted to. But I wanted him. I'm done waiting. I've waited long enough. I'm done with the shy glances and platonic flirting. I wanted more. And now was my chance to have something. Someone. To have him. I nudged my head while my eyes were trained on Dean's flannel. The buttons undid themselves, which surprised Dean. I then leaned forward and nudged the flannel with my nose so I had more access to his neck and below. I pressed a kiss to Dean's neck and trailing down to his shoulder. With one last kiss, I bit down on Dean's shoulder. Dean yelped and clenched a chunk of my shirt in his fist. I continued to bite, suck, and kiss the abused skin until it had turned into a sweet purple bruise. I sweetly kissed the hickey and along Dean's jawline, whispering sweet loving praises that make him melt.

"You're mine." I claimed, and Dean nodded meekly. "Say it."

"I'm yours." Dean said, and I hummed in approval. I returned to his shoulder, licking along the bruise and listening as Dean's let out a shuddery breathe.

"Say it again." I requested, kissing the hickey proudly.

"I'm yours." Dean repeated sweetly, whimpering softly. "Fuck, I'm yours."

"Mine."

"Yours."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, some excitement! Now the romance truly begins! Honestly, I've been waiting for this moment, which is crazy because I'm the writer. I swear, I'm a goddamn mess.
> 
> And although you didn't technically meet her, I bring you Kali.
> 
> So now you've met Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Castiel, Chuck, Amara, Donatello, Sam, Dean, Jess, Brady, Ruby, Lilith, Jervis, Crowley, Garth, and Bess. Now we—sorta—have Kali. Who else shall we meet as this adventure continues?


	13. A Blossoming Friendship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel knows about Lucifer and Dean; Gabriel takes a stroll to think things over and meets someone new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was reading through my chapters and counted the Feels. I feel like there's more Feels coming from Gabriel and I think that's a good thing, because Gabriel is usually characterized as this bubbly carefree Archangel. To me though, Gabriel is a precious soft boi who has lots of feelings.
> 
> Side note: While searching Google for Enochian translators—with very little success—I found something. Gigipah, which is supposed to mean "breath". I hope that's the correct translation.

The next night  
Gabriel's P.O.V

The sound of pages turning and keys crunching was all that was heard around the motel room. It was generally peaceful. Tonight was the fourth night and in three more days we'd be leaving LA. Personally, I liked it over here. Besides the short visit from the Malum Sisters, everything was great. No Ghosts. No bloodshed. Nothing like that up here. 'Which makes me wonder what's happening down there.' I thought, pausing what I was doing. 'What exactly are the Malum Sisters doing? Where are they?' I questioned. 'No, stop it!' I shook my head, brushing those negative thoughts aside. We're still on vacation. We can worry about those things when we get back. I decided to distract myself and focused my attention on my brother. Watching him flip through his book. It was an interesting book—Whisper Me This by Kerry Anne King—but I knew his mind was elsewhere. 'Dean.' I thought, nodding to myself. 'He finally snagged the loudmouth Winchester.' I thought jokingly. 'Good for him.' I tried not to feel jealous, but I couldn't help it. However he wasn't the only one I was jealous of. I was jealous of Dean too. He'll take Lucifer away from me. And Lucifer will forget all about me. That's what happens when you get in a relationship. 'No! Stop that!' I scolded myself. 'You selfish bastard, you know they would never do that. And you know for a fact that both of them would be happy for you, so you should be happy for them too.'

"Gabriel, is everything alright?" I blinked, suddenly brought back into reality by my brother's voice. He was staring at me with a concerned frown on his face, his book closed and placed on the nightstand. He looked prepared to get up at any moment. "I couldn't help but notice your distress. Your thoughts are very loud."

"I saw you yesterday." I blurted out. Lucifer hummed, his concern turning into confusion. "Yesterday night, I went to check on you and Dean since you guys ditched us." I explained, turning my gaze back to my laptop. Although I didn't know what to type, so I just stared at the screen. "I saw you through the curtains. You were all combing his hair and being all lovey-dovey."

"How much?" Lucifer asked quietly.

"How much what?" I inquired, playing dumb. I looked up just in time to see Lucifer groaning and rolling his eyes.

"How much did you see, Gabriel?" Lucifer asked seriously, elaborating.

"I watched up until Dean-o hopped into your lap." I stated bluntly. "Still, the moment was really sweet. I'm actually really jealous."

"Does anyone else know?" Lucifer asked. He sounded genuinely worried. I shook my head, bringing him some relief. "And you won't tell anyone?"

"You two should be the first to tell everyone." I insisted, giving my brother a smile. "I'm happy for you." I said, and Lucifer smiled back at me.

"Thank you."

"I wish I was as brave as you." I said, my smile wavering. Lucifer's own smile completely disappeared and he looked at me with that same concerned frown once again.

"Where is all this coming from?" Lucifer asked confused, his eyebrows creasing.

"I'm just trying to make conversation." I said hurriedly, waving him off. But Lucifer shook his head and popped up by my side on the edge of my bed, taking my laptop out of my lap and forcing me to look him in straight in the eyes. "Lucifer, stop." I said, trying to avoid eye contact. But my dear brother was persistent. Lucifer firmly cupped my chin and gave that stern look that I could never lie to, even if I wanted to.

"Gabe."

"I," I licked my dry lips, trying to grasp for the right words. "I'm just wondering if confessing my feelings for Sam is worth it."

"Why do you say that?" Lucifer asked, blinking. I just shrugged halfheartedly, not really wanting to answer the question. "Gabriel."

"Because!" I yelled, accidently unleashing my wings and causing the lamp to fall to the floor with a loud crash. However Lucifer kept the same concerned and confused expression. My anger quickly disappeared and my shoulders slouched as I calmed down. I tucked my wings neatly behind my back, feeling them twitch every now and then. "Because all I ever do is make him upset and uncomfortable."

"That's not true." Lucifer said, shaking his head. "You don't see the way he looks at you."

"The way he looks at me?" I echoed, looking and sounding ever-so hopeful. "How does he look at me?"

"Like you hung the stars." Lucifer answered. "Which is actually true, but he doesn't know that." He joked, winking at me and actually making me laugh. "If you really pay attention, you'd see how much he cares about you." Lucifer advised. "Ok, Gabe?"

"Ok, Luci." I replied, nodding slightly and Lucifer nodded back. My eyes fluttered closed as I inhaled deeply, collecting my thoughts. 'My feelings for Sam don't feel similar to the feelings I held for Kali. Damn, I'm in deep.' I thought. "Luci," I opened my eyes and instantly my eyes starting burning, like I was about to cry. I've been crying a lot lately. "I think I'm still confused." I said, choking on my words. "I don't understand."

"Calm down, Gabe." Lucifer said softly.

"I love Sam, I know I love Sam." I said, rapidly blinking to keep the tears at bay. "But why can't I wrap my head around things?"

"Things like what?"

"I don't know, I'm so confused!" I was highly upset. My wings to flared up once again and they were glowing to the point I almost blinded myself. But Lucifer just shushed me softly, his own wings appearing and wrapping around me. Coaxing me to make my wings disappear and whispering in our native tongue. Sweet encouraging things. Like how he loved me and how he needed me. Things like that. The golden glow dimmed and dimmed until the room was back to its normally lit state. I breathed in my brother's scent, leaning my head on his shoulder and letting him hold me like I was a Fledgling once again. "I feel like an idiot. Like my mind is in shambles..." I mumbled, embarrassed. "It hurts just trying to explain to myself. My thoughts are clashing and taking up too much space. They're so loud." I told Lucifer, rambling.

"Gigipah." Lucifer said softly, still speaking in our native language. It was comforting and I couldn't help but follow directions. "You doing alright?" Lucifer asked, switching back to English, his wings vanishing from around us. His arms were still wrapped around me though.

"No." I admitted. "But I will be. I just think I need to take a walk or something." I said, and Lucifer nodded in understanding before letting me go. I got up and walked towards the door, taking my raccoon pullover off the coat rack and my sneakers from the closet. I smiled as I felt the large hoodie engulf me and my smile grew as I flipped on my hoodie. I gave the perky ears a playful tug and happily swished the fluffy tail before moving on to put on my most cherished sneakers.

"Gabriel." Lucifer called, and I hummed in acknowledgement as I adjusted my shoes. "Are those...are those your shitty ass neon Heelys?"

"They are." I answered cheerfully. "You know what they say." I said, opening the door and giving my brother a cheeky smile. "Wear heelies to escape your feelies." I joked. Lucifer just scoffed an playfully rolled his eyes with a shake of his head. "I love you." I said, blowing Lucifer a kiss. He chuckled and caught my kiss.

"I love you too." With that left said, I exited the motel room and closed the door behind me before rolling away with my thoughts. The cool breeze mixed with the faint smell of salt water as I rolled through the quiet streets. The streetlights glowed white and nearly clashed with the stars above me. The stores and houses that were decorated with pretty fairy lights. The 24 hour restaurants were lit and still swarming with costumers. I kept my head up and my eyes wandering as I rolled through the silent streets. I was surrounded with things that usually made me happy and excited like a puppy...I still felt like crap. Suddenly my stomach growled and I nearly fell on my ass. I paused. I guess my emotional state made me hungry. I hardly think any of these restaurants would let me in while wearing pajamas and Heelys. But a fast food restaurant would and the closest fast food restaurant was Taco Bell. So I rolled my way up to the store and into the empty drive through.

_"Welcome to Taco Bell!"_ A woman greeted me almost instantly. _"What can I get you at 1:37 AM?"_ She joked. When she had said the time, I nearly did a doubletake. I didn't realize I was out that long.

"You got a drink labeled regret and sorrow?" I asked jokingly, making the woman laugh.

_"Not that I know of."_ The woman said, and I could almost hear her shaking her head.  _"Whatcha doing out here so late at night?"_

"Whenever times get hard and things get a little too real, I just take a stroll." I informed the woman. "When I'm inside, my thoughts, mainly my negative thoughts will clutter up until I can no longer think. But when I'm outside my thoughts just flow, both the positive and negative ones."

_"That's so interesting."_ The woman mused. _"Now I gotta ask. Are you ok?"_

"No." I confessed, sighing heavily.

_"What's wrong?"_ The woman asked. She sounded both concerned and curious. But I shook my head, even though she couldn't see it. I didn't want to bore her with my problems.

"It's a long story." I replied. The woman scoffed softly.

_"I got time."_ The woman said dismissively. It was my turn to scoff. _"Dude, believe me, I got time."_ She insisted. I hummed in deep thought, thinking over my options. And really, I didn't have many. So I decided to just let it all out.

"Well, my love life is absolute shit." I said, rolling to the bell-shaped speaker and leaning against it. I made sure to speak loudly and clearly. "Ya' see, I'm an Archangel. My name is Gabriel, by the way. Anyway, a long time ago I met this woman named Kali. She's a Hindu Goddess and all that. Pagan God, ya'know. She referred herself as 'my girl', but she was never truly mine. All we really did was fuck. There were no cute nicknames, hand holding, cheek kisses, or anything like that. There were dull kisses on the lips and she'd sit in my lap, but that was it."

_"That sounds toxic."_

"Well I realize that now." I said, scratching my head sheepishly. "She was deadly as she was beautiful. But that beauty was corrupt."

_"What a poet you are."_ The woman commented, and I chuckled slightly. _"Keep going."_

"She played me and I played myself for a fool." I said sadly, twiddling with the cuffs of my oversized sleeves. "After awhile, she dumped me. She, uh, she actually dumped a bucket of bloody goat entrails over my head and told me that she was done fiddling with a toy."

_"Jesus Christ."_

"I know." I groaned, scrubbing my face. "She was a crazy bitch."

_"Goat entrails though? Isn't that a little...over the top?"_ The woman questioned, clearly disgusted.

"I know!"

_"Then what?"_ The woman asked. _"Did you get over her?"_

"I was pretty broken up about the breakup. I mean, who wouldn't be after something like that, am I right? Anyway, Michael came to take me and Lucifer in. He said playtime was over. The real Loki and Xochipilli came back. They're Pagan Gods too, by the way."

_"Why'd they leave in the first place?"_ The woman asked curiously.  _"That sounds kinda irresponsible of them."_

"Well ya' see, me and Lucifer had nowhere to go after we were kicked out of Heaven. So we asked Loki and Xochipilli _specifically_ for help. We swapped places with them and the other Pagan Gods were none the wiser." I explained, and the woman let out an interested hum. "Like I said, I was pretty broken up about the breakup. After Michael took us in, I refused to let anyone in my room and I hated leaving my room. I always had a tube of ice-cream on hand and I'd cry almost all the time."

_"How'd you get through it?"_

"My brothers." I answered. "Lucifer was sick of my moping after two months of my bullshit and busted down my bedroom door. They consoled me for weeks on ends until I felt like my usual bubbly Trickster self. But get this, I'm in love. For real this time. I've fallen for a guy named Sam Winchester. He makes me go crazy, in a good way. I like stealing glances whenever he isn't looking and holding his hand whenever I get the chance and being near him whenever he comes around. I like how his hair is so fluffy and how his eyes seem to change color in certain lights and how his smile makes my wings flutter." Just talking about the younger Winchester made my heart shake and quiver, which was something that never happened when I was with Kali. Which was why I was so confused. All these sweet feelings came when I first met Sam. But when I was with Kali, those feelings were dull and damn near cold.

_"Your feelings for this Sam guy..."_ The woman's voice brought me back to reality. _"Gabriel, they sound so sweet and innocent."_

"You think so?" I asked, and the woman said yes. "I just...I just don't want to get hurt or be treated like I did when I was with Kali."

_"Well, the way you described Sam, I'm pretty sure he won't hurt you."_ The woman assured me. _"And if he does, you have caring brothers who'll gladly kick his ass."_

"I'm sure they would." I agreed. "I just want him to see me as more than some powerful being or his goofy friend. I want to be...closer to him. I want him to be mine and I want to be his."

_"I hope you tell him that soon."_

"Me too." I mused. 'This is nice.' I thought, smiling to myself. 'Who knew speaking my thoughts and concerns aloud would make me feel better. Looks like Mikey were right.'

_"Hey, you want some comfort food?"_ The woman asked kindly, and I hummed happily with an eager nod. She laughed. _"What can I get you, Gaby-Baby?"_ She asked. I hummed at the nickname, quietly saying it to myself and letting it roll off my tongue. 'Gaby-Baby. That's a new one.' I thought in approval.

"Can I get a Crunchwrap Supreme, a Nachos Supreme, one large Strawberry Skittles Freeze, one large Mountain Dew Baja Blast, two of those delicious Caramel Apple Empanadas, and a side of Cheesy Fiesta Potatoes. Please and thank you."

_"You sure can eat."_

"I'm emotional. Sue me." I joked, making her laugh again. Her laugh was cheery and she even snorted a little. Her laugh made me feel happy.

_"Come up to the window."_ The woman instructed and I said ok, rolling forward and stopping in front of the window. The window opened up to reveal the woman I was talking to. She had long fiery red hair that tumbled down her back in waves, milky fair skin that sported faint freckles, and the brightest pair of green eyes I've ever seen. They reminded me of emeralds. She wore the Taco Bell uniform, sure, but she also wore a button. Underneath her nametag laid a lesbian pride button. "Wow." The woman said, gasping as she looked down at me. "Wow." The woman repeated with a small snicker. "You sure are something."

"Expecting something else?" I asked, and she nodded. "Nope. It's just ordinary me." I shook my head and showed myself off in my raccoon pullover, cupcake themed baggy pajama pants, and my neon Heelys that looked like they came straight outta the 80s'. "Just your friendly Archangel from Sioux Falls."

"Well, my name is Celeste Middleton." The woman said, but upon examination I saw that wasn't the name on her nametag. "But I go by Charlie Bradbury now."

"What are you running from?" I blurted out. When I realized what I just said, I went to apologize. But Charlie just shook her head. She wasn't angry.

"Maybe I'll tell you soon." Charlie said, and I slowly nodded. I was going to hold her to it. "That'll be $14.05." Charlie then said. Taking out my wallet, I handed Charlie $20 and told her to keep the change. Charlie then handed me a box and a drink holder before she waved goodbye. I told her goodbye and skated away. I wanted to hurry back to the motel to eat before my food got cold.

* * *

The next day rolled around and I never forgot my conversation with Charlie. Even if it did happen yesterday. The girl interested me. So much so that I told my friends and family about the girl. But I made sure to keep out the parts where Sam came up.

"You went to Taco Bell in Heelys?" Sam asked, trying and failing to keep his laughter to himself. I nodded. "You really are something." Sam said, and I took his comment as a compliment. "For some powerful Archangel, you really are goofy." He said, ruffling my hair. I relished the feeling of both his touch and the flutter of my heart before they both went away. "Maybe I should come with you next time."

"I don't think I'll be able to find a pair of Heely your size." I joked, and Sam rolled his eyes in response.

"I can tell you already made a new best friend." Michael said. "You were always able to make quick friends."

"I enjoyed her company greatly."

"Greatly?" Sam echoed, raising an eyebrow. "Must've been some conversation."

"It was." I said, smiling brightly. That's when an idea came to me. I quickly jumped to my feet and made my way towards the door, shoving my feet into my Heelys until they were properly on. Yeah, I looked like an idiot hopping around on my foot, but who gives a shit?

"Gabriel, where are you going?" Castiel asked curiously.

"Back to Taco Bell." I answered. "I gotta ask Charlie something."

"Dressed like that?" Crowley asked, pointing to my clothes: a pure black muscle-tee that read **SMASH** in bold golden letters, gray sweatpants, a galaxy themed beanie, and my neon Heelys which clashed with the rest of my outfit. I shook my head and opened the door.

"I don't care, this is really important." I said, and I was out of there. I skated through the crowd streets, ignoring the questioning looks and rude snickers as I rolled by. When I came to my destination, I saw the drive through had a few cars, but I didn't have to wait that long. I quickly skated through the drive through before the next car came in and almost screamed in excitement when the car in front of me moved. It was my turn.

_"Welcome to Taco Bell, how may I help you?"_ I paused instantly when I realized the person talking to me wasn't Charlie, but in fact a male.

"Yeah, hi there." I greeted. "You, uh, you mind putting Charlie on? If she's here, that is." I requested rather nervously. "This is really important, I promise." I swore, talking fast so he wouldn't tell me to leave the property.

_"...Hold on."_ The man said, and I told him ok. I fiddled with my hair during the wait. There wasn't much for me to do except wait and hope the drivers didn't honk their annoying horns at me. But then I heard static and perked up.

_"Hello?"_ Charlie answered, and immediately my excitement returned.

"Charlie, hey, this is Gabriel!"

_"Oh, hey!"_ Charlie said cheerfully. _"What can I do you for?"_

"Well, ya' see, this crazy idea came to me and I almost considered not asking you." I started, rubbing the back of my neck. "But I really _really_ liked the conversation we had last night and I was wondering if you wanna have a sleepover?"

_"A what?"_ Charlie asked, giggling.

"A sleepover." I repeated. Her laughter was so contagious that I couldn't help but giggle myself.

_"When?"_ Charlie asked with another bubbly giggle, bringing me hope.

"Whenever you have free time." I said, and then I waited for my answer. I heard her talking quietly with the guy from before, which made me all-the-more anxious.

_"Can you come up to the window please?"_ Charlie then requested. I laughed happily and raced up to the window where she was waiting for me. "Here." She said, holding out a napkin with a number on it. Her number. "Text me when you add my number and I'll call you, ok?" She gave me a wink as she handed me the napkin. I could barely contain my excitement.

"Great!" I cheered, grinning up at the redhead.

"I hope you two have fun." The man from before said. "Name's Adam Milligan, by the way." He said, introducing himself with a small salute.

"Gabriel Anarchy." I said in greeting, giving him a wink. Adam gave me a small head tilt before smile. Although the smile looked like it was more to himself than to me.

"You must be one strange Archangel." Adam remarked jokingly, referring to myself as a whole. I didn't blame him for thinking that. I did come all the way here to ask Charlie a rather simple question. In Heelys no less. And I asked if she wanted to have a sleepover. So yeah, I am pretty strange.

"Oh absolutely."

"Here." Charlie then said, shoving the same frozen drink and desserts I had yesterday into my hands: Strawberry Skittle Freeze and two Caramel Apple Empanadas. "I picked up that you liked sweets, so here. On the house." Charlie said, flashing me a cheeky wink.

"You're the best."

"I know."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh shit, Charlie is finally in this story! And guess who else, it's Adam! You must be wondering why Charlie and Adam work at Taco Bell in LA when Charlie is a geeky genius and Adam should be in medical school. We're getting there.
> 
> So now you've met Michael, Lucifer, Raphael, Gabriel, Castiel, Chuck, Amara, Donatello, Sam, Dean, Jess, Brady, Ruby, Lilith, Jervis, Crowley, Garth, Bess, and we sorta met Kali. Now we have Charlie and Adam. Who else shall we meet as this adventure continues?


End file.
